4 years of PFS - my story/progress

[Atticas]

What's up everyone, just coming back on after probably a year or so. Some of you will remember me, some of you have no idea who I am, so here's the short of it:

So, about 4 years ago, I decided to take a generic version of the POS drug we all know and love :D
At the time, I was a very fit, young dude with decent hair but a small receding hairline. I was signed with a modeling mother agency, but I learned quickly that that certainly wasn't gonna go anywhere after I took finasteride.

The side effects I faced from it were:
> muscle atrophy (most noticable near the insides of my elbows. Big creases where muscle used to be)
> big dark circles under my eyes
> shriveled, flaccid dick
> looser skin
> incredibly low energy (which fucked with my weightlifting hard for a while)
> brain fog (constantly walking into rooms forgetting why I was there, forgetting what I was gonna say mid-sentence, etc)
> depression/suicidal thoughts

When I came to these forums probably about 2 years ago, it was a great change from the depressive, spiraling circle of depression and negativity you'd find on other websites like propeciahelp or solvepfs.
I didn't kick it off real well with some of the members here, because since I didn't suffer from ED (somehow) like the rest of them did, some of them took my concern for my face as trivial, petty bs... but for me, that was one of my biggest concerns. I was supposed to be signed with this modeling agency, but my face felt like it was falling apart, and I was working a job where I had to work with customers face-to-face everyday, and was supposed to act all cheery and happy, but seeing my own reflection during the day would visibly depress and anger the fuck out of me.
It also didn't help my reputation here since I got into a few arguments with CDN because I was frustrated with his lack of citing any studies - some of his protocol I never really found concrete evidence for to this day, but to the man's credit, with or without him listing all the studies, his protocol has helped many recover. Regardless of these experiences, I still found a lot of hope and positivity here among the forums.

I did find loads of research backing CDN's claims with herbs, and started buying tons of them. To this day, I still have like 15-20 sitting in my kitchen in various jars.
The herbs helped me INCREDIBLY. They gave me energy, better mental clarity, and hope. I started going back to the gym and got pretty religious about it again. I went pretty much full paleo (which I still follow) because of all the food allergies and intolerances I learned I had. I quit a job that I fucking. H A T E D. as well, which helped lessen my depression. Even if I was worried about money for a month or so, waking up to something that demeaning wasn't helping my current state of mind. Meditation was helpful as well, as it seemed to keep some of the bad thoughts at bay and chill me out.

Where I am now:
So I've been taking the herbs on and off now for about 2 years (currently on them again every day), got a new job, got back into the gym religiously, started taking caffeine about everyday, and started doing YouTube shortly after leaving that miserable job from before. YouTube has surprisingly helped with my depression and energy levels tremendously. It was great for me those 2 years ago, because I was so insecure about my depression and the shit PFS had done to my face that I would stay cooped up in my room alllllllllll the time, so I had just tonssss of time to study and work on it. Luckily though, that gave me something else to focus on other than just myself and all my problems, and now I have +34k subscribers, a couple extra sources of income, and something I can be proud of creating. I'd really encourage any of you to try and find a new hobby or something you can really find value in too, because believe me, it really does help to see value in yourself or something you're doing while going through all this - to give yourself another way to find hope and a reason to keep going - because sitting around, reading these forums alllll the time, and circling through depressive thoughts in your head does NOT.

So anyways, I'm definitely feeling better these days - not full recovery, but better.
Current side effects I still face:
> dark eye circles
> creases still where muscle used to be around elbows
> shriveled flaccid size
> skin... maybe still looser than should be? But I'm also 4 years older now, so idfk. I might just be older at this point lol

Anyways, that's basically my story. Hopefully that catches up some of you guys that have been DM'ing me over the past year or so and gives some of the rest of you some encouragement.
I hope to see more progress in the future, and feel free to let me know any tips or tricks you guys have learned along the way below, because I still wish to recover fully someday.

[The Goat]

Any plans? You could try a pro hormone cycle (R-Andro, AndroHard).

[Maxout777]

Welcome back man, glad to see life’s treating you well!

[jacknap]

thanks reporting back was thinking of you the other day. I think my skins gotten looser too could also be puffiness from cortisol and age like you said too

sounds like u made some big strides

[Atticas]

Any plans? You could try a pro hormone cycle (R-Andro, AndroHard).

Actually really been thinking about it man. Prohormones always kinda sketched me out and I’ve always been a fan of staying “natural”, but I also would really love to see some of the remaining side effects wear off, even if it was just fixing the dark circles under my eyes cuz MAN they have never quit since 4 years ago

You guys think it’d be worth it? Maxouttt I remember you telling me you didn’t notice any extra hair loss when you took it and I hope that’d be the case for me too lol

[Maxout777]

Actually really been thinking about it man. Prohormones always kinda sketched me out and I’ve always been a fan of staying “natural”, but I also would really love to see some of the remaining side effects wear off, even if it was just fixing the dark circles under my eyes cuz MAN they have never quit since 4 years ago

You guys think it’d be worth it? Maxouttt I remember you telling me you didn’t notice any extra hair loss when you took it and I hope that’d be the case for me too lol

I never had hair loss or MPB in the first place, so I would be a bad example to go off of. But yes, I didn’t experience any on cycle.

[jacknap]

Actually really been thinking about it man. Prohormones always kinda sketched me out and I’ve always been a fan of staying “natural”, but I also would really love to see some of the remaining side effects wear off, even if it was just fixing the dark circles under my eyes cuz MAN they have never quit since 4 years ago

You guys think it’d be worth it? Maxouttt I remember you telling me you didn’t notice any extra hair loss when you took it and I hope that’d be the case for me too lol

bro you're still on staying natural? prohormones are huge for recovery. I'd say like 25% of my recovery was from prohormones or more. they're really not that big of a deal if you do herbs for pct. I don't even get suppression from r-andro just 4 andro.

[Atticas]

bro you're still on staying natural? prohormones are huge for recovery. I'd say like 25% of my recovery was from prohormones or more. they're really not that big of a deal if you do herbs for pct. I don't even get suppression from r-andro just 4 andro.

25%?? Shit, another 25% might totally fix me lmao did you experience any negative side effects from the Andro yourself? Mood swings? Hair loss?

[jacknap]

25%?? Shit, another 25% might totally fix me lmao did you experience any negative side effects from the Andro yourself? Mood swings? Hair loss?

I sometimes would get in a negative mood a bit. Didn't notice too much hair loss my hair loss is very subtle and slow. the positives outweighed the negatives for me. some ppl have had more negative experiences but imo just run the cycle like medicine

[Atticas]

I sometimes would get in a negative mood a bit. Didn't notice too much hair loss my hair loss is very subtle and slow. the positives outweighed the negatives for me. some ppl have had more negative experiences but imo just run the cycle like medicine

Good shit! Alright, might have to look more into it then after next paycheck. You pretty close to 100% yourself?

[jacknap]

Good shit! Alright, might have to look more into it then after next paycheck. You pretty close to 100% yourself?

yeah pretty much

[The Goat]

Actually really been thinking about it man. Prohormones always kinda sketched me out and I’ve always been a fan of staying “natural”, but I also would really love to see some of the remaining side effects wear off, even if it was just fixing the dark circles under my eyes cuz MAN they have never quit since 4 years ago

You guys think it’d be worth it? Maxouttt I remember you telling me you didn’t notice any extra hair loss when you took it and I hope that’d be the case for me too lol

Worth a shot. Even some of the herbs contain hormones. So if you want to pull the natty card, you probably already ingested exogonous (pro)hormones haha.

Good luck dude.

[Jado]

I've been a little sketchy on the prohormone thing as well. I tried once, but I started to feel worse. I've fasted again, and been sticking to the protocol, so I'm starting a cycle today. I think my system has always been really sensitive, so I'm gonna start with just 1 capsule R-Andro/day to see how it goes. If all goes well I may move up on the next cycle. Anyway, welcome back, and I'll post my progress.

[Cdsnuts]

I've been a little sketchy on the prohormone thing as well. I tried once, but I started to feel worse. I've fasted again, and been sticking to the protocol, so I'm starting a cycle today. I think my system has always been really sensitive, so I'm gonna start with just 1 capsule R-Andro/day to see how it goes. If all goes well I may move up on the next cycle. Anyway, welcome back, and I'll post my progress.

I asked this in another post of yours, but how long has it been since you've fasted? You don't want to come off of a fast and into a cycle.....

[Jado]

I asked this in another post of yours, but how long has it been since you've fasted? You don't want to come off of a fast and into a cycle.....

I've done a couple. The first was almost a year ago, and the most recent was a couple months ago. Also, I do intermittent fasting at varying times, but the last "long" one I did was a couple months ago.

[Cdsnuts]

I've done a couple. The first was almost a year ago, and the most recent was a couple months ago. Also, I do intermittent fasting at varying times, but the last "long" one I did was a couple months ago.

How many days?

[Jado]

How many days?

7 days.

- - - Updated - - -


7 days.
The intermittent fasting I've been doing is anywhere from 1-3 days, but the two juice feasts were 7 days.

[Cdsnuts]

Actually really been thinking about it man. Prohormones always kinda sketched me out and I’ve always been a fan of staying “natural”, but I also would really love to see some of the remaining side effects wear off, even if it was just fixing the dark circles under my eyes cuz MAN they have never quit since 4 years ago

You guys think it’d be worth it? Maxouttt I remember you telling me you didn’t notice any extra hair loss when you took it and I hope that’d be the case for me too lol

I would think after taking a 5ar inhibitor drug, your concern about staying natty would dissipate and you would do anything in your power to get back to where you needed to be. Compared to propecia or dut, etc, these prohormones are very safe and very light. You took something that was very un-natural which fucked you up, why not take something un-natural to get you better? And honestly, I wouldn't call the PH's unnatural at all, as they are found naturally in the human body.

If you're not predisposed to MPB, you'll be good to go. If you are, like myself, the hairs will be jumping ship like they're on the titanic. I know you put alot of your identity as a person in your looks, so I could see how that would worry you. But myself, and many guys after going through this nightmare, could careless about their hair as long as they get their health back. It really puts things into perspective. That being said, if you don't have MPB in your genetics, you don't have much to worry about.

[Atticas]

I would think after taking a 5ar inhibitor drug, your concern about staying natty would dissipate and you would do anything in your power to get back to where you needed to be. Compared to propecia or dut, etc, these prohormones are very safe and very light. You took something that was very un-natural which fucked you up, why not take something un-natural to get you better? And honestly, I wouldn't call the PH's unnatural at all, as they are found naturally in the human body.

If you're not predisposed to MPB, you'll be good to go. If you are, like myself, the hairs will be jumping ship like they're on the titanic. I know you put alot of your identity as a person in your looks, so I could see how that would worry you. But myself, and many guys after going through this nightmare, could careless about their hair as long as they get their health back. It really puts things into perspective. That being said, if you don't have MPB in your genetics, you don't have much to worry about.

Well yea... like I stated before, I already feel fine energy-wise and most everything else, so there's not much concern for me there, but nice sermon anyway.

My problems from the get-go were low-energy and what this drug did to my muscles, skin and eyes.... one problem's fixed, one more to go imo.

In regards to family history... I think we're more on the side of thinning rather than completely balding... so still could be a slight worry but I guess I may find out soon.

[Cdsnuts]

Well yea... like I stated before, I already feel fine energy-wise and most everything else, so there's not much concern for me there, but nice sermon anyway.

My problems from the get-go were low-energy and what this drug did to my muscles, skin and eyes.... one problem's fixed, one more to go imo.

In regards to family history... I think we're more on the side of thinning rather than completely balding... so still could be a slight worry but I guess I may find out soon.

Sermon? Lol.

You got it my child. May the lord be with you.

Is that you in your avatar?

[Atticas]

Sermon? Lol.

You got it my child. May the lord be with you.

Is that you in your avatar?

Yea, from a few years back

[Cdsnuts]

Yea, from a few years back

I'm surprised you chopped it off at the face seeing as that's your money maker......

[Atticas]

I'm surprised you chopped it off at the face seeing as that's your money maker......

That's a real knee-slapper my guy :cool:

[Cdsnuts]

That's a real knee-slapper my guy :cool:

From sermon to knee slappers to your guy......you never know what angle I'm gonna come from.

[jacknap]

I thought I recall you saying it wasn't you when I read your old posts

[Bankai9000]

I thought I recall you saying it wasn't you when I read your old posts

^this lol, or did the pics change

[Cdsnuts]

I thought I recall you saying it wasn't you when I read your old posts

Bingo......

- - - Updated - - -


^this lol, or did the pics change

Lol....same pic. I wonder if this dude knows he's representing Atticus?

[Atticas]

I thought I recall you saying it wasn't you when I read your old posts

Nah lol I used to have this pic I just found off google of some jacked looking guido dude with a baseball cap but people here started throwing a fit saying the pic looked too much like a douchebag lol so I switched to my own

[jacknap]

Nah lol I used to have this pic I just found off google of some jacked looking guido dude with a baseball cap but people here started throwing a fit saying the pic looked too much like a douchebag lol so I switched to my own

you're a dime. what are your tips for looks maxing?

[Atticas]

"LOL this guy's problems are so stupid! What idiot... how dare he care about muscle sapped out of arms, dark circles stuck under eyes for 4 years, and other aesthetic issues!
Our problems so much bigger! Let's mock him in chat."

Literally how mature you guys are being. I've had multiple people send me DMs while I was gone for like a year or so asking how I was doing because they had similar problems/worries. This kinda shit makes guys not wanna not leave their house - sink into depression - wanna kill themselves - etc

I get it - you guys may have worse problems, but you don't see me going around going "OMG COMPARED TO CANCER PATIENTS UR GUYS PROBLEMS SO MINUSCULE. STOP BEING BABIES"

We're not here to dick measure who has worse problems - we're supposed to be here to help each other out. Being pretentious jackasses doesn't help your cause.

[Bankai9000]

I get you man no worries.
After a month of ED AND SKINISSUES my skin got that bad that I stopped caring about ED. No point to have a working dick if you look like a freak of nature.

[Maxout777]

"LOL this guy's problems are so stupid! What idiot... how dare he care about muscle sapped out of arms, dark circles stuck under eyes for 4 years, and other aesthetic issues!
Our problems so much bigger! Let's mock him in chat."

Literally how mature you guys are being. I've had multiple people send me DMs while I was gone for like a year or so asking how I was doing because they had similar problems/worries. This kinda shit makes guys not wanna not leave their house - sink into depression - wanna kill themselves - etc

I get it - you guys may have worse problems, but you don't see me going around going "OMG COMPARED TO CANCER PATIENTS UR GUYS PROBLEMS SO MINUSCULE. STOP BEING BABIES"

We're not here to dick measure who has worse problems - we're supposed to be here to help each other out. Being pretentious jackasses doesn't help your cause.

You’re also sort of being a pretentious jackass who just so happens to be asking for help and then giving shit to those giving it to him.

We started this the same time, my man. I’m long on the other side and you’re still dealing with this. Mainly due to your ability to fight off good advice. You wouldn’t run hormones due to wanting to be “natty” due to what some dumbass in the gym might think of you. Who the fuck cares? You answer to yourself everyday in the mirror - not some random asshat.

I’m not saying accept everything as gospel, but your attitude is exactly why people on this forum treat you as they do. I understand your issues are important to you as do others - however when you behave as a grade schooler with snide remarks like “nice sermon anyway” and other passive aggressive bullshit - well, don’t be surprised when the big dogs actually bite, Astro.

[Atticas]

You’re also sort of being a pretentious jackass who just so happens to be asking for help and then giving shit to those giving it to him.

We started this the same time, my man. I’m long on the other side and you’re still dealing with this. Mainly due to your ability to fight off good advice. You wouldn’t run hormones due to wanting to be “natty” due to what some dumbass in the gym might think of you. Who the fuck cares? You answer to yourself everyday in the mirror - not some random asshat.

I’m not saying accept everything as gospel, but your attitude is exactly why people on this forum treat you as they do. I understand your issues are important to you as do others - however when you behave as a grade schooler with snide remarks like “nice sermon anyway” and other passive aggressive bullshit - well, don’t be surprised when the big dogs actually bite, Astro.

I wasn't giving shit to anyone in this forum except CDN after he came in with this -



I know you put alot of your identity as a person in your looks, so I could see how that would worry you. But myself, and many guys after going through this nightmare, could careless about their hair as long as they get their health back. It really puts things into perspective.

Maybe I just took that wrong, but that's where the whole "sermon" comment came from. "You put alot of your identity in your looks" - again, I was signed to a modeling agency when this went down and worked a job where I had to be greeting and talking to customers everyday, so yea, it kinda felt important then. And now, I'm on camera doing youtube/streams... yea, still feels kinna important. I'm not trying to look tired or sickly all the time. And the whole going into "us other guys could care less about their hair, we're just trying to get our health back. Puts things into perspective" thing... I wasn't sure what the dude really meant by that but it certainly didn't seem like it was meant with good intentions towards me.

And yea, I wanted to stay natural..?? lol sue me? I wanted to stay natural to be able to inspire others and not have a physique tainted by prohormones or steroids. I also was NASM certified like a year prior to the Finasteride incident, so maybe that'd help you understand another reason why I didn't wanna go taking anything like that, even after my hormones being thrown totally off.

Anways, again if I took CDN's original comment out of context and came off snide, that's on me. My bad - but if not, I'll put it just like I did years ago man - I'll gladly take good advice from people here, but I'm not stroking some dude's internet ego to get it. Talk to me civilly and it'll come in return.

[jacknap]

honestly atticus I'm with you on valueing looks still it's actually a bigger deal but people often sweep it under the rug especially Americans. You're from UK right? Europe values aesthetics much more then Americans. I'm Canadian and the 'men shouldn't care about looks meme' is very big here but I'm also a European citizien in Greece where aesthetics is valued much more for thousands of years.

There's literally a halo effect and people treat you and attribute good qualities to you that you may or may not have if you have good aesthetics. On a forum it's very easy to discount that because it's all words lol

CD and maxout though are solid guys and true inspirations so try to bite your tongue a bit :P most of the protocol max's out your looks naturally anyways because looks are primarily health indicitators so you improvd your health you improve your looks

I don't agree with the natty thing you should really research the prohormones I actually don't get any suppression from r-andro and most people don't and the herbs are so powerful when you rotate them that you'll be back online in no time. If you're really concerned used the time to research it on the forum and other places in stead of argueing with people who are only trying to help. cd and maxout dont need to be here anymore they're recovered!

[RickTheRuler]

Prohormones aren’t even that serious to be honest...they’re honestly like a step above high quality t boosters, creatine, or whatever stuff you buy.. they are NOTHING close to real steroids.. the whole mechanism of how prohormones work tell you it’s nothing close to the real stuff like a masteron, anavar, Winstrol, turinabol etc... not even in the same ballpark...

I played college ball, I seen what legit roids can do up close, the real shit is illegal for a reason. I seen guys get 2 year results in 6 months.

& technically if people with pfs are running below their natural baselines, taking prohormones in a pfs state would put you close to your natural baseline had you never got pfs, which puts you equal with everyone else, you don’t have an advantage over other normal people on this.... so the whole moral stance on them is silly to me to be honest, ....you shouldn’t care what people think cause they don’t know nor understand your situation. This is to get better at the end of the day, which is the most important.

My opinion


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Atticas]

honestly atticus I'm with you on valueing looks still it's actually a bigger deal but people often sweep it under the rug especially Americans. You're from UK right? Europe values aesthetics much more then Americans. I'm Canadian and the 'men shouldn't care about looks meme' is very big here but I'm also a European citizien in Greece where aesthetics is valued much more for thousands of years.

There's literally a halo effect and people treat you and attribute good qualities to you that you may or may not have if you have good aesthetics. On a forum it's very easy to discount that because it's all words lol

CD and maxout though are solid guys and true inspirations so try to bite your tongue a bit :P most of the protocol max's out your looks naturally anyways because looks are primarily health indicitators so you improvd your health you improve your looks

I don't agree with the natty thing you should really research the prohormones I actually don't get any suppression from r-andro and most people don't and the herbs are so powerful when you rotate them that you'll be back online in no time. If you're really concerned used the time to research it on the forum and other places in stead of argueing with people who are only trying to help. cd and maxout dont need to be here anymore they're recovered!


Prohormones aren’t even that serious to be honest...they’re honestly like a step above high quality t boosters, creatine, or whatever stuff you buy.. they are NOTHING close to real steroids.. the whole mechanism of how prohormones work tell you it’s nothing close to the real stuff like a masteron, anavar, Winstrol, turinabol etc... not even in the same ballpark...

I played college ball, I seen what legit roids can do up close, the real shit is illegal for a reason. I seen guys get 2 year results in 6 months.

& technically if people with pfs are running below their natural baselines, taking prohormones in a pfs state would put you close to your natural baseline had you never got pfs, which puts you equal with everyone else, you don’t have an advantage over other normal people on this.... so the whole moral stance on them is silly to me to be honest, ....you shouldn’t care what people think cause they don’t know nor understand your situation. This is to get better at the end of the day, which is the most important.

My opinion


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Appreciate the respectful replies.

Yea, I'm about to the point now where taking prohormones just to fix myself won't really bother me. I'm not gonna be a personal trainer anymore, and even if I did want to motivate people in the future with natural fitness, I can just show them pics of how I've progressed naturally twice from skinny, to big, back to skinny, and back to bigger again.

And thanks jack for letting me know about you getting no suppression from the prohormones. I willlll probably be a little worried about side effects if/when I go on them, but I really just want to get my pre-PFS health completely back to normal again. Could be the final nail in the coffin to finishing it.

[Cdsnuts]

I wasn't giving shit to anyone in this forum except CDN after he came in with this -



Maybe I just took that wrong, but that's where the whole "sermon" comment came from. "You put alot of your identity in your looks" - again, I was signed to a modeling agency when this went down and worked a job where I had to be greeting and talking to customers everyday, so yea, it kinda felt important then. And now, I'm on camera doing youtube/streams... yea, still feels kinna important. I'm not trying to look tired or sickly all the time. And the whole going into "us other guys could care less about their hair, we're just trying to get our health back. Puts things into perspective" thing... I wasn't sure what the dude really meant by that but it certainly didn't seem like it was meant with good intentions towards me.

And yea, I wanted to stay natural..?? lol sue me? I wanted to stay natural to be able to inspire others and not have a physique tainted by prohormones or steroids. I also was NASM certified like a year prior to the Finasteride incident, so maybe that'd help you understand another reason why I didn't wanna go taking anything like that, even after my hormones being thrown totally off.

Anways, again if I took CDN's original comment out of context and came off snide, that's on me. My bad - but if not, I'll put it just like I did years ago man - I'll gladly take good advice from people here, but I'm not stroking some dude's internet ego to get it. Talk to me civilly and it'll come in return.

You definitely took it wrong. As a model, whether you want to believe it or not, the truth is you put alot of concern into your looks.....othewise, you wouldn't be a model. And if you think you have to "stroke my internet ego" to be here, then you really don't get me at all. I'm not that guy. Maybe that's something that you're internalizing and then projecting here.

[jacknap]

You definitely took it wrong. As a model, whether you want to believe it or not, the truth is you put alot of concern into your looks.....othewise, you wouldn't be a model. And if you think you have to "stroke my internet ego" to be here, then you really don't get me at all. I'm not that guy. Maybe that's something that you're internalizing and then projecting here.

thing is though all guys care about their looks there's just an ethos to pretend amongst many that it doesn't matter but if it doesn't matter why don't men just wear womens dresses LOL

[Cdsnuts]

thing is though all guys care about their looks there's just an ethos to pretend amongst many that it doesn't matter but if it doesn't matter why don't men just wear womens dresses LOL

Well yeah, most people care up to a certain point, some more then others. Once you realize that looks don't matter as much as you think they do when it comes to getting laid things get alot easier. I look back at myself and am embarrassed at how worried I was about my hair. Especially now. When it comes down to it, looks will certainly get you in the door, but after that if you dont have any conversational skills to back it up, you're just a pretty face which doesn't really get you to far past the initial meet and greet.

I also look horrible in a dress.....don't ask me how I know.

[DKnighten]

I also look horrible in a dress.....don't ask me how I know.

Send pictures or it never happened


;]

[Cdsnuts]

Send pictures or it never happened


;]

Got em.....lol.