GoldenSun's Journey to 110% (Minoxidil induced PFS)

[GoldenSun]

So here it is, the beginning of my Journey to freedom. I'll be honest, Propecia "help" convinced me that my life was over and that CD was some master mind health scammer. After talking to a few real people who have got better after being on your protocol my mind started to change.

I wont go over my entire story ( Most of its in my introduction post you can find in my post history) so I will summarize:

I was 19 years old (almost 20) and wanted to grow out my beard using 5% minoxidil. The chemical seemed to have very minor side effects if any, many guys had great success with it so I said "what the hell" and got a three month supply. I used it for only 5 days and around the third I noticed my libido was down (first time in my entire life) and the other side effects followed. I had no idea about PFS or anything so I assumed my sides were just caused by me working out too hard and they would get better in the coming days. I quit the medication out of caution, little did I know these side effects would last for over 5 months! After some research I learned what PFS was and that Minoxidil (in very rare cases) can cause PFS, so I thought I was F'ed for life. Later, I found out about the "CDNUTs" protocol after chatting with a guy in the YouTube comments who was having good results. I found TMO and put it in the back of my head that If time doesn't cure me, I'll try this. I got on TRT for a while with little success and I'm glad to say I'm off now. I told my self if I'm not cured in 6 months, it's all in on the protocol. So here is where I start:

I just finished my 1 week Juice feast. During the feast my body felt physically ill and I felt severely depressed. After suffering with PFS I feel "Numb" and like a robot most days, but during the fast I felt deeply depressed. I think this was my body getting rid of toxins though because the next few days of refeeding I started to feel back to baseline and my erections got a bit better! So after just one week of the feast my erection quality improved about 10-20%! My other symptoms are there but I have already noticed some improvement and that makes me very hopeful!

The week before the feast I bought it all: Ultra Hard, EVERY SINGLE ONE of the herbs on TMO, Bathmate, Skin brush etc. I numbered each herb and marked my calendar to know the rotation. I knew this would be more worth it than spending 1000's of dollars on doctors that would just tell me I'm depressed or OCD and try to give me benzos and SSRIS, no thank you. So the hit to my pocket was worth it.

One positive that I've experienced just by time alone is that my severe constant fatigue and anxiety that I experienced passed away in the first month after stopping. Brain fog and anxiety comes in waves every once and a while but it's manageable. Also I thought it would be worth noting I never went through a "crash", my symptoms all come on gradually in those 5 days and stuck (a few went away but sexually I've been the exact same)

Now, here are my symptoms:

Symptoms (in order from most severe to moderate):

1. Weak erections, I get about 60% hard but not enough to have sex most of the time (when I do no fap they get stronger but after one nut its back to square one) also the head doesn't fill sometimes
2. Low to no Libido (little change if at all since I got off minox)
3. Severe Anhedonia, I wouldn't call it depression because I cant feel true sadness. I just feel like nothing matters and I'm a robot
4. Generally strange penis issues: Flaccid penile shrinkage (lost about an 1-2 inches depending on the time of the day), skinnier penis, grey penis, slight pain in head of penis, dry skin on penis, penis moves differently when I move around naked, penis gets larger when I poop and larger when I sit, it shrinks when I stand and moves like dead meat
5. I either have premature ejaculation or it's extremely hard to ejaculate, never normal
6. Really numb penis, more numb than my arm
7. Muted orgasm and inconsistent sperm color
8. Muscle softening (have not loss strength though)
9. Inability to feel alcohol (I drank about 15 shots in 3 hours and all I felt was dizzy and slower in thought. I didn't have that "buzz", "drunk/high" feeling. I used to feel borderline euphoric when I drank.
10. Dry hands and loss of hair on feet
11. "Weak" feeling hands (comes and goes, not that major)
12. More "shaky" overall
13. I just simply feel unwell, like I am slightly sick all the time
14. More hair on my head (ironically reversed my balding quite a bit and I didn't even use it on my head)
15. Way thicker beard (probably something to do with DHT)
16. Literally 0 social anxiety now (not a negative but I don't feel like my real self and because of this I could talk to a 10/10 girl and not even feel an ounce of anxiety)
17. Tingly nuts (this has went away now but it comes and goes)
18. Numb ball sack (never heard anyone else talk about this)
19. Testicular atrophy (changes all throughout the day)

Ones that I have mostly recovered from over time (thank God)
1. Sever constant fatigue (only happens sometimes now)
2. Depersonalization and derealization (still have short bouts)
3. Constant anxiety (still have certain days)

There may have been a few more that I forgot but they probably aren't that major.

So here I am, I got a drawer full of prohormones and herbs and I'm ready to use them. I pray soon you will see me on that recovery sticky! I'm physically, spiritually and mentally ready to defeat this beast once and for all. Wish me luck and God bless you all!

Also, I would also to say how eternally thankful I am for this website and for all the great work CD has done. Propecia "help" is a death cult and if that was the only forum to "help" men suffering from this, I don't think I could have made it.

[Holistic]

Hold fast brother.

[Outlaw]

Hey man you got this.

At the beginning it's hard to believe people on a message board, but this thing really works. It's just a painfully slow process, so you gotta learn to integrate the protocol to your life and try to forget about it so that you can live life and not think about it.

I made huge progress in the last 6 months. Last winter I had almost every symptom (except for fatigue and insomnia), and now I'm doing good. Not recovered yet, but my symptoms are mild enough that I can enjoy life while my body recovers. It's easy work from here. You'll get there.

[HOPE]

Hey man you got this.

At the beginning it's hard to believe people on a message board, but this thing really works. It's just a painfully slow process, so you gotta learn to integrate the protocol to your life and try to forget about it so that you can live life and not think about it.

I made huge progress in the last 6 months. Last winter I had almost every symptom (except for fatigue and insomnia), and now I'm doing good. Not recovered yet, but my symptoms are mild enough that I can enjoy life while my body recovers. It's easy work from here. You'll get there.

Well, holy fucking shit. Every symptom is mine, even the weird ones like faster beard growth. We got the same shit deck of cards, brother, but we got this. Onwards we go!

[GoldenSun]

So I'm finishing up week one of the protocol and here is my current situation: My erections are a bit stronger, my morning word is more frequent, my hair falls out when I rub it (not like I'm balding but like how it always did before, for the last 5 months before the protocol I could yank my hair and nothing would come out), I am getting a lot of pimples on my face (like how I used to), my armpits finally smell like they should (before the protocol my armpits smelled like catpiss and now they smell like how they always did). These are positives I did not think I would see so fast. I am nowhere near cured but these are the first improvements I've noticed in months! Thank God for this protocol and forum, it really seems to be working. I pray we all here see a quick recovery! I will come with more updates or questions when they come to me. Stay strong everyone, we will beat this!

[LetsGo]

So I'm finishing up week one of the protocol and here is my current situation: My erections are a bit stronger, my morning word is more frequent, my hair falls out when I rub it (not like I'm balding but like how it always did before, for the last 5 months before the protocol I could yank my hair and nothing would come out), I am getting a lot of pimples on my face (like how I used to), my armpits finally smell like they should (before the protocol my armpits smelled like catpiss and now they smell like how they always did). These are positives I did not think I would see so fast. I am nowhere near cured but these are the first improvements I've noticed in months! Thank God for this protocol and forum, it really seems to be working. I pray we all here see a quick recovery! I will come with more updates or questions when they come to me. Stay strong everyone, we will beat this!

STAY STRONG my brother. Remember exactly how you feel right now.

Please understand that you WILL have downswings. The great way you feel right now will only last for a certain number of days and then you will go back to feeling how you were before. Keep doing the protocol and then in some weeks you will feel better than you do now. This cycle will repeat itself over and over again many times until you will eventually fully heal. I just want you to understand that this is not a straight line upwards, it’s a wobbily line upwards with ups and downs and you must be strong when the downswings hit. There is a 100% chance of downswings and also a 100% chance that you will fully recover if you stick to the protocol 100%. It will just take time.

I believe in you. And we are here for you if you need help or encouragement. We’re all in this together bros.

[GoldenSun]

So I just finished my first cycle of herbs and I'm starting on my second tomorrow. Sadly the last week has been rough. I feel emotionally numb and depersonalized. On top of that I cant keep an erection anymore, unlike the first week or so where my erections were decent. I know I'm just here in the begging so there is no need to get depressed, but sadly this is for sure my first downswing. I'm keeping my head up and pushing through. I hope everyone else is doing well here, we will make it!

[GoldenSun]

For whatever reason right after the fast I was feeling a bit better, erections were better and some body functions felt more normal. I would have said I was about 5% recovered in just a week. Now I have been sitting back at my starting point. The one odd side effect that is now 100% cured is having no body odor, now I smell like an average adult male when I get out of the gym so that is good! But everywhere else I just feel the same as a did before I started. I was reaching out to see if anyone has experienced something similar in the begging, I'm just feeling a bit depressed because I was thinking my case would be linear.

Also, for guys on here who have suffered with a shrunken flaccid penis. I've said this before but my penis gets larger when I sit and smaller when I stand, also when I sit on the toilet my flaccid penis gets larger than it used to be before PFS. My question is, should I start doing pelvic floor pain exercises? My main concern is that this isn't part of the program so I'm not sure if its a waste of time. I'm wondering, for guys who have tried: Did it get better with the protocol alone or did you have to do specific pelvic floor exercises?

[GoldenSun]

Minor update! Some positive, some negative. Starting with the positive. I am experiencing moments where my libido will flicker on about 10-20%, instead of it being at 0% almost all the time! Also my erections are stronger than before starting the protocol. Now to the negative. Sadly a few days ago I hit my head on a metal bar and have been experiencing concussion symptoms. I feel heavy brainfog and some loss of coordination. I'm hoping this will go away soon. I am not too worried because I did not black out but it is still concerning me a bit. I guess this is just another stumbling block on my long journey, I hope everyone else here is recovering too!

[GoldenSun]

So after almost two months on protocol I can say things are improving, slowly but surely. Over the last week my libido will flicker on sometimes, not as intense as it used to but it is there. Every few hours I get actual sexual urges, like any healthy young man should. These aren't as intense as they used to be but after almost 7 months of zero libido this feels almost alien to me, and it is amazing. Also I can now maintain erections decently. They fall sometimes and are kinda flakey but I could have sex if I wanted, so I am not completely imponent. I just wanted everyone on this forum to know I am praying for you, I know we can beat this together. With these small improvements I am no longer in a pit of despair but a mindset of recovery, God bless you all especially CD for putting this info out there. I will come with more updates when I have more improvements or another dreaded downturn.

Also, my concussion is about 70% recovered now thankfully

[GoldenSun]

Hello everyone, I hope all of you are doing well. Just jumping in here to say I started my UH cycle. I did two pumps on my chest this morning and I'm excited to see the progress I make on it. I am in a "down swing" right now with my libido gains sadly gone at the moment but I am not too worried. I was also wondering if anyone has some tips on UH and what to expect. I'll make sure to come back with more updates when I'm feeling better. God bless.

[Outlaw]

Most guys here recommend supplementing with potassium. You could drink coconut water, it's efficient.

Do the protocol strictly to make your body as receptive as possible. Some guys like to avoid masturbation too.

Take it relatively around the same time, in the morning to avoid sleeping issues.

Don't fish for improvements, just take it like medecine and live your life. The improvements will come.

Sniff long rails of tongkat ali between sets at the gym to maximize your gains.

Enjoy the cycle man

[Turnover25]

Most guys here recommend supplementing with potassium. You could drink coconut water, it's efficient.

Do the protocol strictly to make your body as receptive as possible. Some guys like to avoid masturbation too.

Take it relatively around the same time, in the morning to avoid sleeping issues.

Don't fish for improvements, just take it like medecine and live your life. The improvements will come.

Sniff long rails of tongkat ali between sets at the gym to maximize your gains.

Enjoy the cycle man

Died laughing at the Tongkat line lol

[GoldenSun]

Quick question about Ultra-hard for anyone who has done multiple cycles.

I am on day 3 of my cycle (now doing 4 pumps) and I don't feel anything. I didn't really expect to feel different in the first week or so, so I am not freaking out because I don't feel an effect. I am more so wondering how long it takes to "feel the effect" from people who have experience with it

[Brooks]

Quick question about Ultra-hard for anyone who has done multiple cycles.

I am on day 3 of my cycle (now doing 4 pumps) and I don't feel anything. I didn't really expect to feel different in the first week or so, so I am not freaking out because I don't feel an effect. I am more so wondering how long it takes to "feel the effect" from people who have experience with it

I find it odd that you, turnover and myself aren’t feeling cycles now. I felt my first two earlier in the year to a large degree. Could the product or ingredient strength have become weaker?

[GoldenSun]

I find it odd that you, turnover and myself aren’t feeling cycles now. I felt my first two earlier in the year to a large degree. Could the product or ingredient strength have become weaker?

I don't think that is the case for two reasons.

1: This is my first cycle so I don't have previous ones to compare to.
2: I bought around 6 bottles of UH back in May and have had them stored in a dark drawer until this week. So I didn't buy the "new batch".

[Brooks]

I don't think that is the case for two reasons.

1: This is my first cycle so I don't have previous ones to compare to.
2: I bought around 6 bottles of UH back in May and have had them stored in a dark drawer until this week. So I didn't buy the "new batch".

Ah, good point on the May batch. Must be a fluke. So weird how some cycles “hit” and some don’t. I wish we understood why

[Outlaw]

[GoldenSun]

I have been in a downswing for a few weeks now, by far my worst one, by far. I started UH about a week ago and haven't felt much yet. The reason this is causing me to despair is because in my head I had it that my first UH cycle would be a huge milestone in improvement, not so much sadly. Recovery just feels impossible. I am currently dating the most beautiful, kind and loving woman I could ever ask for. She is literally perfect. I met her after my PFS situation though and I am just in so much despair. I just wish my sexual performance could be top notch all the time like it used to be, I wish I could feel truly horny and I wish I could feel child like love instead of anhedonia. I love her and I feel it deeply but it's behind this deep dark shadow of anhedonia and PFS. I just want to be better. I know I just need to keep fighting but this is getting hard. I just pray I will be on that recovery sticky. I am asking for anyone here if they have gotten out of pits like this. God bless

[Flapjack]

You have hardly been on the program man, this shit is going to take a long time. One day at a time brotha

[xxaleksi]

Also, you might not feel the ultra hard much while on cycle but you might feel it after stopping it (baseline increase).

[Turnover25]

Also, you might not feel the ultra hard much while on cycle but you might feel it after stopping it (baseline increase).

Do you feel your cycles anymore? I’ve been UH and Alpha 4 for over a month and haven’t felt anything really. Big difference from my previous ones.

[GoldenSun]

I just can't wait until I have a concrete improvement, one that even if it goes away and comes back I can know for certain that it is from this protocol. Last month I had legitimate sexual urges a few times per day for about a week or two. These urges would even stick after jerking off! I didn't feel close to cured or anything but I did have a concrete thing to latch on to and say "this feels better" and you guys have no idea how much of a great feeling that was. In that state I was able to put PFS in the back of my mind as a thing that I will be done with eventually and I just went on with my life without despair. Like the roller coaster recovery is, this improvement vanished.

I was not too worried though, I expected improvements to come and go. What is really causing me to despair again is not that they went away, it was something I remembered. I remember back in may (before I started the protocol) I had a few sexual urges for about a week, they were not as strong as the ones I experienced last moth but they were there. This has had me worried that these urges I experienced recently were not caused by the protocol but they are just my natural "once in a blue moon" sexual urges if you know what I mean. I just wish I could know that they were caused by the protocol and not just my body feeling okay every once and a while. For example, lets say this week said sexual urges came back. That would be proof of the protocol working in my mind because that is a concrete sequence I have not experienced, back to back sexual urges in a short period.

The thing that is hellish and haunting about this condition is not the symptoms. If my dick shrunk, my libido vanished and my brain got consumed by severe depression, but I knew it would only be a year of torment I would just push through. This condition is so horrible because of the life sentence associated with it, the life sentence the entire internet except this forum believes in. This condition is believed to be a personal hell, one that parallels the Muslim/Christian view of hell perfectly. An enteral torment with no hope of ending. This forum is the only place to preach the contrary and It makes me hopeful but sadly still skeptical.

The last thing I am wondering is if I should tell my girlfriend what I am going through. It would just feel amazing to know there is one person I love that I can talk to about this every once and a while. My fear is if I tell her it will be taken the wrong way. My dick is broken but can be used every once and a while, I can fake it until I make it but it just doesn't feel right. I feel like I'm living a lie. I just want to live my damn life. I just want to be happy again.

I know this is a bit of a depressive rant but it made me feel better to say all of this, thank you to anyone who read this or has any advice on my situation. I'm going to force myself off of this site until I notice improvement. I will ONLY post back when I feel a bit better because f5 spamming this forum wont cure me. I wish you all the best of luck, keep fighting.



TLDR: Not sure if improvements are because of the protocol or just because my body will feel better temporarily every once and a while (even if I was not on protocol). Venting about the life-long nature believed about this condition, and lastly venting on how I have kept my condition a secret from my girlfriend and how this makes my life feel like a lie.

[Brooks]

You need to switch your victim mentality to a victor mentality. You’re just a few months in. This is a marathon, not a sprint.

[GoldenSun]

You need to switch your victim mentality to a victor mentality. You’re just a few months in. This is a marathon, not a sprint.

I know brother, it's just tough. I can only imagine the way I'll feel when this is over with. I will feel better than before I had PFS, I know that. I also know once I get that ONE improvement that I know is one from this protocol my mind will be more at ease.

Also, do you know how long it took for you to see some improvement?

[Brooks]

I know brother, it's just tough. I can only imagine the way I'll feel when this is over with. I will feel better than before I had PFS, I know that. I also know once I get that ONE improvement that I know is one from this protocol my mind will be more at ease.

Also, do you know how long it took for you to see some improvement?

I could only tell in hindsight. At the time it didn’t feel like much. Then I’d look back over a span of months and realize I’d clearly moved forward.

The best thing you can do is not ruminate or obsess man. Take a break from forums and get to work!

[Ratchet_V2]

I could only tell in hindsight. At the time it didn’t feel like much. Then I’d look back over a span of months and realize I’d clearly moved forward.

The best thing you can do is not ruminate or obsess man. Take a break from forums and get to work!

Brooks is right. All things in this world seem to have a half life, except for fuckin’ fin I guess (ha ha). It’s true with improvements, at least in my opinion though. If you have a spontaneous improvement, odds are it will fade as quickly as it came. I don’t say this to discourage you; I say it so you don’t become discouraged when it inevitably happens.

The true improvements occur subtly and imperceptibly over time. Others around you will begin to notice it first. If people around you start to remark at a positive change in you – believe them. It’s because it’s true.

Good luck dude, you will receive back as much as you put into this. Hold yourself accountable, but be kind to yourself. Obsession and rumination is really just a maladaptive motivating/coping mechanism, and sometimes it’s even an insidious form of self-punishment.

Ratchet

[GoldenSun]

I was in no way expected to be back on this forum this quickly but here we go lol. My lord, this recovery the biggest emotional roller coaster I could imagine.

Last night I was on here despair posting and what do you know, the very next day I notice improvements. I can officially say I am feeling the UH after about 2ish weeks (I forget the exact amount of time). My depression/lack of emotions lifted a bit today. I don't know how to explain it. I feel like I was present, really in the moment today. I could feel the sun and the breeze on my skin, I felt witty and quick to think and music was a bit more enjoyable. I just feel more like myself, not all the way but I almost feel this nostalgic feeling of "Oh, this is what life feels like!". It's a feeling I cant really but into words, I just felt more like my self, more present.

I expect this feeling to fade but its great to know I am having some relief from my downswing. The way I felt today took me back to March 11th, the day before I used minoxidil. I don't feel cured or all the way better but I do just feel like I am alive again, even if just slightly. It's like my brain got dopamine for the first time in 7 months, great feeling. I just need to stop despairing even when this feeling leaves. I wish you all the best of luck on recovery, I will be back once again when I notice improvement, God bless.

[GoldenSun]

More improvements.
Libido went up a bit over the last day along with some improvement on penile sensitivity.
I am definitely feeling my cycle now. Lets keep going!

[GoldenSun]

Just checking in to say wow, this is my first real up swing. I am feeling horny as a dog today. Not as much as I used to but damn. I'm not expecting this to be the new norm, I know how this goes now lol but seriously I am feeling pretty good in the sexual department.

I will use this to say I am confident that Rogaine/Minoxidil is a 5ar inhibitor. There is a research paper that says it is a light one, some others say its not. I will say, I took that stuff for fourish days and it made my penis shrink, libido vanish and emotions become blunt and hoping on a protocol for PFS is the only thing that is helping. This is all the proof I need that Rogaine is a 5ar inhibitor. If some dudes get PFS from using Saw P for a few days and others get it after dutasteride for 10 years, this makes me think it really doesn't matter on the amount but what your genetics predispose you for. Meaning if I took SSRIS, Accutane, Saw P, Fin I would probably be in the same situation if not worse. All of this shit can cause the same thing and It's looking like CD is the only guy who has a protocol to get us out.

I'm going to roll with this uptick and enjoy some head from my GF for the first time in a while. Godspeed brothers. I just hope I don't fall for the downswing dooms again.

Also, for the people on the forum saying UH could be weaker now, that is not the case for me. I am feeling it on 5 pumps

[John David]

GoldenSun do you have insomnia as a side from minox?

[GoldenSun]

GoldenSun do you have insomnia as a side from minox?

One of the only PFS symptoms I never got was trouble sleeping or insomnia. My main ones are sexual and depression. In the begging I had really bad fatigue and I could sleep all day, so the opposite

[John David]

Same with me. Initially severe fatigue. Even after sleeping 10hrs i didnt feel rested. I didnt have trouble sleeping as well but later it developed into insomnia. Wanted to try UH but afraid that it will make my insomnia worst.

[GoldenSun]

Crazy how much of a roller coaster this stuff is. Sadly my libido is back down. It was crazy, last week my libido was raging. I just have to keep going. It's so odd, It's like my body was remembering how to work again and then out of nowhere it goes back to functioning poorly

[GoldenSun]

Hey guys, just checking in to say my life has been a bit of the mess lately, death of a close family member mixed with other stuff caused me to fall off of the protocol for a little bit, in other words I half-assed the protocol since December. I do still have times where I feel better than before, I feel like my interests in hobbies/music and what not is much better than it was before the protocol. Before I started the cycle and I was suffering from PFS I had absolutely 0 interest in anything that used to make me happy, now that is different on most days.
My sexual function fluctuates but I will never forget how amazing I felt near the end of my UH cycle, my libido was straight up raging. I might do a fast again just to clear my system and start the protocol 100% again.

I know I am not back to square one though, I have learned a lot and definitely had some improvements.

[GoldenSun]

I am in a big downslope in my recovery at the moment, the biggest yet. I fell off the protocol in December for about two weeks, meaning no working out or diet but oddly the downswing really hit about a week or two ago, so the effects of the fall off were felt about two months later.
I just wanted to say now that I am in this downswing I am apricating the times I felt good on the protocol. Especially during my UH cycle, I had amazing moments. Even before I fell off the protocol I was not hitting things 100%.

What I have been doing: Working out, Herbs, Diet
What I have not been doing: Sunning the boys, pumping, cold showers, no fap, meditation, breathing, skin brushing.

I am leaving this here mainly for my self but I would love some input on how to push through the hard times. God bless you all.

[lastnoirking87]

Certainly would advise you to do whatever amount of cold showering you can, even if it's just 15 seconds at the end or beginning of your regular shower (preferably the end though). This in itself will help with pulling through rough patches, and I mean it helps ALOT.

[GoldenSun]

Over the past 3 weeks I have been in the worst downturn of this whole PFS thing. I basically feel like how I did at the beginning. Has anyone exercise this?
I hope I turn back soon because a few months back my emotions and mood were feeling much better. I am sticking with it though!

[xxaleksi]

Over the past 3 weeks I have been in the worst downturn of this whole PFS thing. I basically feel like how I did at the beginning. Has anyone exercise this?
I hope I turn back soon because a few months back my emotions and mood were feeling much better. I am sticking with it though!

The whole journey is a constant back and forth till the end. Just make the protocol a way of life and ignore the constant fluctuations... easier said than done i know. You’ll be healed before you know it!

[Cdsnuts]

The whole journey is a constant back and forth till the end. Just make the protocol a way of life and ignore the constant fluctuations... easier said than done i know. You’ll be healed before you know it!

This^^^^^^^^

[GoldenSun]

Small update. Today I seem to be feeling better now so thats good! I've started my UH cycle again and over the last few days I have small libido boosts here and there along with life feeling a bit more enjoyable again.
What I shouldnt have done is gone back to PH, evertime I go on there it makes me question the whole protocol, so best to stay off. I hope everyone is also doing good, I'll be back to update once I'm feeling even better

[lastnoirking87]

Small update. Today I seem to be feeling better now so thats good! I've started my UH cycle again and over the last few days I have small libido boosts here and there along with life feeling a bit more enjoyable again.
What I shouldnt have done is gone back to PH, evertime I go on there it makes me question the whole protocol, so best to stay off. I hope everyone is also doing good, I'll be back to update once I'm feeling even better

During your previous UH cycle I believe you said you worked up to 5 pumps and found that to be the point where you really felt it. I may have that wrong, but what have you done this cycle, started at 5, or worked up to it?

[GoldenSun]

I'm working up to it. Currently on 4 pumps a day. Started 4 days ago at 3. I will stay at four for a week or so

[lastnoirking87]

I'm working up to it. Currently on 4 pumps a day. Started 4 days ago at 3. I will stay at four for a week or so

Good deal, thanks

[GoldenSun]

Hello all, sadly still in a downswing. I have been on UH for about 12 days now and I am not feeling it yet. I'm planning on doing a longer cycle so I still know I have time. I will come back if I notice improvements.

[GoldenSun]

Anyone else here have a downswing that lasts almost two months? Mine used to mainly last a week or so

[GoldenSun]

Still in a very bad down swing, few months long. Not sure why. I really just cant stress how good I was feeling in November - Jan. Sad I'm back in the depths again

Should I do another fast?

[Thetfordboy]

Still in a very bad down swing, few months long. Not sure why. I really just cant stress how good I was feeling in November - Jan. Sad I'm back in the depths again

Should I do another fast?

I wish I could guide you man but I'm inexperienced, the boards are quite sadly these days so let's hope the recovered pop back in soon yo help us wounded soldiers.

[Cdsnuts]

You have hardly been on the program man, this shit is going to take a long time. One day at a time brotha

This^^^^^^^^

[Cdsnuts]

I just can't wait until I have a concrete improvement, one that even if it goes away and comes back I can know for certain that it is from this protocol. Last month I had legitimate sexual urges a few times per day for about a week or two. These urges would even stick after jerking off! I didn't feel close to cured or anything but I did have a concrete thing to latch on to and say "this feels better" and you guys have no idea how much of a great feeling that was. In that state I was able to put PFS in the back of my mind as a thing that I will be done with eventually and I just went on with my life without despair. Like the roller coaster recovery is, this improvement vanished.

I was not too worried though, I expected improvements to come and go. What is really causing me to despair again is not that they went away, it was something I remembered. I remember back in may (before I started the protocol) I had a few sexual urges for about a week, they were not as strong as the ones I experienced last moth but they were there. This has had me worried that these urges I experienced recently were not caused by the protocol but they are just my natural "once in a blue moon" sexual urges if you know what I mean. I just wish I could know that they were caused by the protocol and not just my body feeling okay every once and a while. For example, lets say this week said sexual urges came back. That would be proof of the protocol working in my mind because that is a concrete sequence I have not experienced, back to back sexual urges in a short period.

The thing that is hellish and haunting about this condition is not the symptoms. If my dick shrunk, my libido vanished and my brain got consumed by severe depression, but I knew it would only be a year of torment I would just push through. This condition is so horrible because of the life sentence associated with it, the life sentence the entire internet except this forum believes in. This condition is believed to be a personal hell, one that parallels the Muslim/Christian view of hell perfectly. An enteral torment with no hope of ending. This forum is the only place to preach the contrary and It makes me hopeful but sadly still skeptical.

The last thing I am wondering is if I should tell my girlfriend what I am going through. It would just feel amazing to know there is one person I love that I can talk to about this every once and a while. My fear is if I tell her it will be taken the wrong way. My dick is broken but can be used every once and a while, I can fake it until I make it but it just doesn't feel right. I feel like I'm living a lie. I just want to live my damn life. I just want to be happy again.

I know this is a bit of a depressive rant but it made me feel better to say all of this, thank you to anyone who read this or has any advice on my situation. I'm going to force myself off of this site until I notice improvement. I will ONLY post back when I feel a bit better because f5 spamming this forum wont cure me. I wish you all the best of luck, keep fighting.



TLDR: Not sure if improvements are because of the protocol or just because my body will feel better temporarily every once and a while (even if I was not on protocol). Venting about the life-long nature believed about this condition, and lastly venting on how I have kept my condition a secret from my girlfriend and how this makes my life feel like a lie.

Ok.......I got to page three of your thread and stopped reading.

Everything I'm saying to you is for your benefit....

You seem a tad manic, which is understandable, but I think you don't have a realistic timeline for this journey. You're going to drive yourself absolutely nuts doing updates every couple of weeks. This thing is measured in blocks of months.

From your first post when you said you're at 70% after being on for a week.........red flag.

You're expecting too much too soon.

[GoldenSun]

Ok.......I got to page three of your thread and stopped reading.

Everything I'm saying to you is for your benefit....

You seem a tad manic, which is understandable, but I think you don't have a realistic timeline for this journey. You're going to drive yourself absolutely nuts doing updates every couple of weeks. This thing is measured in blocks of months.

From your first post when you said you're at 70% after being on for a week.........red flag.

You're expecting too much too soon.

I said I was 70% recovered from my CONCUSSION. Not PFS. I got a concussion a few weeks after starting the protocol, and it went away in a few weeks. I have never made it past 30% recovered from PFS. If I at any point got 70% recovered I would not be full of worry and doubt. Also, I did notice great improvements during and after my first cycle, it’s only now that for the past 3 months I have fell back to all my symptoms raging again.

[Cdsnuts]

I said I was 70% recovered from my CONCUSSION. Not PFS. I got a concussion a few weeks after starting the protocol, and it went away in a few weeks. I have never made it past 30% recovered from PFS. If I at any point got 70% recovered I would not be full of worry and doubt. Also, I did notice great improvements during and after my first cycle, it’s only now that for the past 3 months I have fell back to all my symptoms raging again.

I see.

So then what have you been doing, or not doing, differently?

[GoldenSun]

I see.

So then what have you been doing, or not doing, differently?

I would say the main thing I am not doing that could help my recovery is I slack on HITT and I still have a lot of stress. I will say, I was not doing HITT often even when I was feeling good in that Nov-Jan period. I think my down might just be caused by the roller coaster that recovery is.

[Cdsnuts]

I would say the main thing I am not doing that could help my recovery is I slack on HITT and I still have a lot of stress. I will say, I was not doing HITT often even when I was feeling good in that Nov-Jan period. I think my down might just be caused by the roller coaster that recovery is.

Typically if you're not getting the results you want, it's because something is missing or being left out. This has been my experience 99.99% of the time with ALL men.

[GoldenSun]

I consume way too much nicotine (been smoking a pack a day over the last few weeks).
I am an obsessive mess constantly checking symptoms/ browsing SS/PH/Hack stasis discord/Whats app chats.
I don't get out in the sun often, I don't do breathing exercises, I don't do HIIT, I don't skin brush, I don't take cold showers, I don't do no fap, I don't pump, I don't backload, I don't eat paleo

I do: Lift heavy four days a week, Cycle ALL herbs, take the daily sups, eat gluten free

And I wonder why my upswings don't stick.

I will be hitting this shit fully and I really think I should to another cleanse, it only feels right.

I will: Follow the protocol 100%, quit nic, and come back when I'm feeling good..



Also, fuck Propecia help

[GoldenSun]

Following the protocol 110% for the last two weeks. Had very good energy over the weekend and felt the least depressed I've been all year. Also my body odor is the strongest and most masculine its been since getting PFS.

I have a long way to go but I'm no longer slacking on diet, good luck everyone

.

[Cdsnuts]

Following the protocol 110% for the last two weeks. Had very good energy over the weekend and felt the least depressed I've been all year. Also my body odor is the strongest and most masculine its been since getting PFS.

I have a long way to go but I'm no longer slacking on diet, good luck everyone

.

Good. It makes that much of a difference. I can only convey this so much until the guy has an "ah ha" moment.

[GoldenSun]

Some news to report: Starting mid day Friday and going to Saturday evening I had an amazing upswing (after feeling down for a while). Felt that euphoric/nostalgic feeling where my depression and Anhedonia lifts massively (last time I had this was about 3 months ago) and just enjoyed a great weekend with some friends and my gf, truly felt great and really reminded me of pre PFS days. Sadly that feeling faded later but it is always good to have those out of the blue massive upswings.

Well all good things come to an end and like the irony life can be at times I woke up Sunday with a MASSIVE stomach ache (Worst I have ever had). And it turns out my appendix was inflamed and I needed to get it removed asap (this could explain some of the GI issues I have been having lately) so I got emergency surgery and I am feeling much better. Sadly though I was put on anti-biotics, an injectable dye for the x ray and some pain killers (I think oxy) I'm off all the meds now (so that's good) but sadly I cant work out or take supps for the next week, I will still eat healthy and get sun and go for walks though. Hope everyone is doing well! and I hope none of those meds "set me back", it was an emergency though.

Also: all of my organs in my stomach (excluding my now removed apendix) were healthy. This is great because I have heard those "horror stories" over on propecia help about how sups "destroy your liver" so luckily my liver function and all is fine!

[Zerolibido]

The whole journey is a constant back and forth till the end. Just make the protocol a way of life and ignore the constant fluctuations... easier said than done i know. You’ll be healed before you know it!

Do THE GODDSPAAM MKTHERFUCKING PROYOCOL BITXH FO.IT BITXH DO IT BITXH DO NOT BITXH DO.IT NITCH

DO IT BITCH
do it gimp