Kurse's Journey to 200% Peak Human Performance

[Kurse]

Hello all! I will first give some background about my life and where I am now.

I have always been relatively active since I am a competitive Target archer winning a few competitions. *applause*. My diet would consist of Chicken, Fruit, Veg and rice for about 5 out of the 7 days a week. I am low Body-fat but also not bulky, A sort of lean-skinny type with wide shoulders.

Monday 7th November 2022

Now let’s begin. I first took finasteride 1mg on Monday 7th November 2022, at 13:46 pm (I logged it). I felt instant relief as soon as I took it. I thought to myself “I’ve finally stopped my hair loss!” and had a mini celebration with my housemates for 30 minutes after I took it…

2 hours after my first dose of finasteride I tried to masturbate since I was a “horny freak” and I could get it up, although much slower than before which spooked me a little bit so I assumed it was a nocebo effect since everything else was fine. Here is where it goes downhill. Tuesday morning rolls around and I experience things I have never experienced before… These include:

Impotence
Loss of sensitivity in the tip of the Penis
No Libido
Insomnia (1-3 hours of sleep)
Testicular Atrophy or I suppose a shrivelled and less full look and more retracted.
Penis was hard when soft. Almost like I was erect but in flaccid size. (This one really confused me because I have not heard this before)
Fatigue (Probably due to Insomnia)
Brain Fog (had the worst short-term memory loss I’d ever heard of)

Fast Forward… Monday 21st November 2022

Able to get an erection if watching porn or touching myself for an extended period. libido is almost non-existent also it’s a little bit harder to maintain an erection. The penis is still moderately numb but not cold to the touch. The refractory period is slower than before and at about 30% baseline.

Fast Forward… Friday 2nd December 2022

the erection wouldn’t always be able to stay at 100% hardness and would go from 70-100% but could maintain. After ejaculating pre-fin I would keep an erection for about 5 minutes but after fin, I seem to lose it about 1 minute after ejaculating. Morning wood is rare but happens still and I don’t have a decent rigidity in my flaccid penis (very floppy like it’s hollow). Still have horrible Insomnia and Fatigue.

The Regimen I was taking PRE-FIN which is not the way to go according to TMO so will be cutting it out and cycling herbs.

Test booster containing:
Vit D3 - 25μg
Vit B6 - 10mg
Zinc - 20mg
Selenium - 100μg
Tribulus Terrestris - 10,000mg
Ginger Root - 2500mg
Maca Root - 1,500mg
D-Aspartic Acid - 960mg
Ashwagandha Root - 500mg
Fenugreek Seed - 500mg
Caffeine Anhydrous - 80mg
Black Pepper Extract - 5mg

Omega-3 Fish Oils - 2000mg (600mg EPA, 400mg DHA)

Before GYM:
BCAA’s - 1000mg
L-Leucine 500mg
L-Isoleucine 250mg
L-Valine 250mg
Beta Alanine - 1000mg

Improvements I am Looking to make:

I want to begin a Fast or Juice Feast however, I am already fairly light so I don’t want to lose a serious amount of weight in calories since it could send me to the hospital. Still doing research on the TMO page though so I am still trying to figure out the plan!

Herb Changes:
I need to cycle herbs and not take them in bulk so I am tossing the T-Booster and looking to add Pine Pollen since many people have said it helps a lot. Royal Jelly and Tongkat Ali seem to work for most so I will also be adding those and the rest of the herbs recommended provided I can find them in the UK.

I was taking Melatonin before bed for insomnia but stopped due to it having Aromatase inhibiting properties which would make things worse.

Dietary Changes
Currently adapting my diet to fit the Paleo Diet and adding fish into my weekly meal plan. Adding veggies to my lunchtime meals.

I am also studying Carb Backloading and how it helps. Along with a Mass Gainer with some creatine, however, I may not do this since It can upset the stomach.

GYM + Training
Adding in a HIIT session during gym training and going more consistently. Looking into lifting heavier.

Brain / Sleep / Wellbeing
I began breathing exercises for 15 mins in the evening and attempted meditation although I am not great at it so far.

I am also going to attempt a 5-minute cold shower a couple of hours before bed and shut off all blue-light devices 1 hour before sleep. Also looking into L-Theanine. I have also looked into Magnesium 30 minutes before sleeping seems beneficial, I will have to test it.

No more alcohol!

Sexual
I am going to try and do no-fap for 1 week periods and develop it into 2 weeks etc. It’s a marathon not s sprint. Since I know that Testosterone seems to spike up to the 1 week period of no-fap from anecdotal studies and some input from MorePlatesMoreDates.

Will start going to the GYM 3x per week (Push-Pull-Legs) split and a HIIT session with sprinting 2x per week.
And still do archery for 3x per week 2-hour sessions pulling/holding 42lbs * 6 arrows every 3 minutes or so.


Things I don’t want to try just yet:

Pro-hormones - This is sort of a last-resort approach for me. I don’t want to mess with hormones any more than I already have.

Sunning - I live in the UK, and the sunlight is a rarity which is why I supplement Vitamin D. Also sunning my “boys” is impossible since I live in a residential place where neighbours would have a lovely view.

Fasting - I am a lightweight individual with lean mass. Fasting might cause me to become lightheaded and non-functional should we say although I am not completely opposed to Juice Feasting but will need to invest in a blender and some research.


I am able to keep normal composure for most of my day especially after reading SwoleSource and being advised to stay away from Propecia Help or Tressless >:( fucking silly Redditors! It was the biggest lifesaver in terms of anxiety.

I believe 100% this is a way out and I believe it’s a journey that could last anywhere from 1-5 years but I am prepared! It’s almost like life is forcing me to get my life in gear and not be so lazy and silly with drugs and vanity.

That’s all I have to say. I will try and keep everyone updated monthly for Upswings/Downswings and progress.

Copper, Master Mal, Chi, and English all had wonderful recovery stories. Helps me stay positive :)

Also, I am still reading and preparing TMO plans because I don’t want to get them wrong so any help would be appreciated!

Thanks All,
Kurse

[Mjw1999]

Welcome mate. Wishing you a speedy recovery and hopefully the support this forum can offer.

[Maxout777]

Welcome man. Just stick to the script and keep at it and this will all be over before you know it!

[LetsGo]

Hey, welcome to the board!

I would avoid the “test booster” supplement, fenugreek isn’t on the list for example, so it’s best to get the individual herbs and cycle them daily. (Go down the list with one herb each day, in the same order.)

I would very strongly recommend doing the fast rather than the juice feast. It was actually easier for me to do the water fast, because you’re just drinking water and after about day 5, I stopped feeling hungry. I went for 21 days and would have done 30 days if I didn’t have a friend’s wedding that I needed to attend.

As for the idea of not wanting to lose too much weight since you’re not fat, almost everyone has a lot more body fat than they realize. If you told me you’re 5’10’ and weigh 7 stone — fair enough, you’re skeletal. If you weigh 10 or 11 stone, you can easily lose half a stone without endangering your health. Or a full stone by going for two weeks. You can always regain the lost fat if you want.

What I didn’t realize about going the juice route is that it is extremely annoying to have to drink 4 liters of extremely sweet juice every day. It made my teeth feel awful. Also orange juice was the only remotely filling juice, which meant that I was ravenously hungry the entire time, but all I had was juice and water. You also fill up your entire fridge with fruits and vegetables, only to find that it’s 1 - 2 days worth of juices at most. So you’re going to be shopping for groceries almost daily.

CD recommends using a blender and a nut milk bag to make juice, and I believe he said it took an hour or two every morning. When I tried it, it was profoundly messy and I felt like the juice yield was insufficient, and it made a mess every time. Personally I hated that method, and a Breville juicer ended up being a better option for me. You just put the fruit and veggies in and juice comes out, then you disassemble and clean it which takes 1 - 2 minutes. So much easier than the nut milk bag (in my opinion,) but a high-quality juicer can cost >$250 and you might not use it much afterwards. It also takes up a lot of countertop space.

So with all that in mind, I’d definitely recommend doing the water fast route, unless you’re basically anorexic, or you have a very strenuous physical job like a construction worker, or if you work at an Amazon warehouse where the slowest 10% get fired every month and you can’t afford to lose the job. The water fast gives better results and could lead to faster healing.

I would be careful with the Mass Gainer and probably set it aside until after you’re recovered. Most of those products are filled with fillers and chemicals, which is not what your body needs in this state. CD has a recommended protein powder if you want to go that route.

If you need help putting on size, the key is to eat more meals. Never skip breakfast, have a post workout shake, have lunch, have an early dinner right after work, and have another meal before bed. If you’re awake about 16 hours per day, you will have time to digest at least 5 meals if you time it properly — but start with 4 meals and that may be enough. You don’t want to pile on tons of fat by going too far in the other direction.

[LetsGo]

Continued…

With the cold showers, I would take it a little bit easy at first. 5 minutes isn’t harmful but it’s a lot harder to do, and the most benefits come with the first 2 minutes. Wim Hof says that 2 minutes is enough and everything beyond that is just for mental benefits. Make sure to do a Wim Hof breathing round and do not turn the water to cold until the retention breath. If you do this, it’s not very bad at all.

Search Wim Hof Guided Breathing on YouTube for a guided breathing session video. I do it twice per day.

One other thing is that the TMO website has a “quick start” page that pretty much sums up the entire protocol and lays out what a day of the protocol looks like. So that’s, IMO, the main document and the rest of the website is for the finer details.

Stick to the protocol very tightly, to get out of here faster. I took gaps because of the pandemic and was also missing elements and that’s why I’m here and not recovered yet, so don’t make that mistake.

[AltRoute]

Welcome Kurse -

You sound like you got a good mindset on you which is half of this battle, your going to get through this!!

Use the board as reference and don’t hesitate to reach out to any of us with help or a supporting hand!

-Alt

[ihateit]

you ra every brave to woithstand that insomnia

I had "mild" pfs for years and when I gpt slight insomnia medicated on quetipaine which has basoically made me worst case pfs with severew muscle wastage, insomnia, suicidal ideation etc

you seem to have avoided the worst stuff so keep doing wht you are doing

[Kurse]

Hey, all I want to thank you for the welcome, Tips and Suggestions I really appreciate the help!

I have just reached a point where I can begin the water fast I am planning 7 days and will only continue to 14 days if I feel up to it and with supervision (I live with a Med Student).
I am 170cm and 56KG which I believe is a safe weight but please let me know if I am too light.

Herbs/Supplements that I have bought so far include:

L-Theanine, Ashwaganda, Maca, Pine Pollen, Goji Berry, Royal Jelly, Iodine, Tribulus, Suma Root, Magnesium and Cordyceps

Other:
Vitamin D
Organic Whey Protein

I have looked for the others but they seem difficult to source in the UK.

I have also reduced my cold showers to 2 minutes with wim-hof breath work alongside the Skin Brushing, This is done 5x per week.

I have also changed my diet around to fit into the Paleo Diet including some Dairy such as Yogurt, Butter and Cheese.

The gym has been good. I have been taking it slowly since I don't want to injure myself mainly light weight in the Push/Pull/Legs Routine with short ab circuits.

Also, my Fatigue has slightly improved. I am able to get around 5 hours by taking steps such as;
Working out Earlier,
Turning off all screens 1 hour before bed,
Taking Magnesium 30 minutes before bed,
I also bought a weighted blanket which seems to have a calming effect, similar to that if I had a partner. It's a little bit sad but I would recommend it if you don't have a partner.

I am also considering getting a bathmate since I have heard that it can prevent penile shrinkage due to lack of erections, will be looking at buying one soon but am just a little embarrassed because I know it's seen as a sex toy and I live with other students so I wouldn't want them seeing it.

I won't go into other symptoms since you all know the answer to that thanks again for keeping me positive!

[LetsGo]

Hi Kurse,

I’m really glad to hear that you’re doing the water fast! You will lose about 500 grams of fat each day during a fast, but if you try exercising, you will lose more muscle. Right now you’re at the low end of a “normal” BMI (18.5 to 24.9), and 1 week would put you around the borderline of being underweight (which is okay if you’re just barely underweight.)

Doing a second week would put you around a BMI of 17.3 (50 kg.) At 13.5 (39 kg) BMI organ damage starts happening, and somewhere around 12 (35 kg) you’d literally starve to death. Soooo… you don’t want to get into the mid-40 kgs even though it shouldn’t cause any long term issues. I’d say that 2 weeks would be the most to consider, definitely do not do 21 days like I did. Or you could do 10 days, or stop when you dip below 50 kg.

For the herbs; L-theanine and magnesium aren’t on CDs’ list so I would probably not put those in the rotation. Magnesium is listed as a sleep supplement to take at night if you think you’re going to have trouble getting to sleep. (In my experience it also causes explosive dirrhea, so just a heads-up on that. I’m not saying don’t take it, but be prepared to need to RUSH to the bathroom multiple times the next morning if you do take it.)

For the workouts, one great resource is Arnold Schwarzenegger’s Encyclopedia of Bodybuilding. There’s some irrelevant info (history of bodybuilding) but he shows photos of different exercises for the different muscle groups, and gives you advice on how to do them. This is really important so that you don’t hurt yourself by doing the wrong exercises or doing them the wrong way. He also explains the fundamentals of bodybuilding, like the critical concept of progressive resistance and the need for sufficient calories.

There are four muscle groups: chest, shoulders, legs, and back. One strategy (not the ideal strategy for professional bodybuilding, but good enough for our purposes) is to focus on one of those muscle groups during each workout. If you’re doing 3 sets of chest, 3 sets of legs, etc, in the same gym session you’re not getting enough of a workload on any one muscle group to make great progress. Some people swear by full body workouts (all 4 muscle groups in one session,) to do it properly (at least 12 sets per muscle group) you’re looking at some multi-hour gym sessions 3 to 4 days per week. If you focus on one muscle group per workout, you can bring maximum intensity to it, and it should only take about 45 minutes (with 2 minute rests in between sets.)

Arnold recommends bringing a notepad into the gym with you, and keeping track of what exercises, weights, reps, etc you’re doing, so that you can check to see that you’re increasing the workload over time. You don’t want to settle into a routine where you do the exact same workout (same weights, etc) every time, or else you will stop making progress. As you get bigger and stronger, you will need to slowly increase the weights you lift.

I used Arnold’s book to identify exercises for each muscle group that I wanted to do, and that helped me put together a workout routine for each muscle group. You could do 1 or 2 sessions with a personal trainer to have them teach you the exercises that you want to do.

Working out your abs can help you get “six pack abs” which could be nice to have. Arnold recommends doing an ab workout after working out whatever muscle group you’re working on. In other words, there’s no “ab day,” and you don’t have to give your abs X days of rest in between working them out. The abs are small muscles so it’s okay and best to work them out more frequently if you want to get visible abs.

[LetsGo]

continued…

Another weightlifting instruction book, not as comprehensive as Arnold’s, is “Starting Strength” by Rippletoe. It illustrates how certain exercises are done, so it’s good for that. It’s considered one of the classic books in the world of weightlifting.

The weighted blanket is a good thing as well. It helps promote sleep and it feels like the blanket is hugging you.

Be careful to follow the proper instructions with the Bathmate, that’s extremely important.

Anyway, it sounds like you’re on the right track and I hope I was able to offer you some helpful tips. You got this!

[isseo]

Hi guys. You are on the right track, keep going. For L-theanine it's on the protocol and it helped me a lot. You can put it in your coffee. Magnesium be careful, mine contained B6. Magnesium is great for sleeping, but B6 can be dangerous if it builds up in your body. So make it pure.

[Kurse]

Hello all, Here is a Small update!

So I did a little bit of research about Hard-Flaccid Syndrome that I am experiencing and all symptoms linked to this are the exact ones I am undergoing funny enough. The treatment for it is a lifestyle overhaul so the Protocol seems to be precisely what I need. It sort of suggests that calming the nervous system and gaining some muscle control in the form of Pelvic floor relaxation alongside breathing exercises are the current treatments alongside a few others like yoga/meditation.

Feeling very motivated but also drained as hell, really hard to exercise with Fatigue and Insomnia. The Insomnia got a little bit worse because I was an idiot and had an early archery tournament and forced myself to wake up after a few hours of sleep which seemed to have set me back a bit.

I believe that insomnia relief will relieve some of my symptoms including Anxiety, Fatigue and Nausea. since I am sure it's elevating my cortisol levels.

what am I doing to relieve insomnia?
As previously mentioned the weighted blanket makes me feel a little more relaxed.
I have recently (today) switched to a pure form of magnesium which I will be taking before bed with 3g of Glycine.
I have also bought some noise-cancelling earphones and a blackout sleep mask since even before fin I struggle to sleep with noise/light.

Negatives :(
1) I am still struggling with Exercise/GYM since I just don't have the energy to do it often.
2) The Fast/Juice Feast. I think the fast will make me lose too much weight in the end so I will opt in for the juice feast.
3) Fapping is also very hard for me to stop sometimes. Pre-fin I used to do it multiple times a day... just stopping it cold turkey puts me off but I am determined to stop for at least a week and then after that I will try and go for longer and longer!

positives :)
1) Paleo diet seems to be going well. Feel like I have a little more energy than before and feel a little better in a well-being sense.
2) Cold-Showers are so fucking good like what the hell?! Why have I never done this before? Yes, it does suck when I am in there but coming out feels amazing!!!
3) Skin-Brushing is also FUCKING AMAZING like why is this stuff not promoted more?! fuck body wash/scrubs this thing leaves my skin clean and smooth as hell!
4) Breathing exercises are good but I am still not great I feel small benefits from them but I am not quite used to them.
5) L-Theanine works like my concentration is much better than even pre-fin for a couple of hours until it starts to taper off.

Future Reference:
1) I've been waking up with some nausea that lasts for like 2 ish hours. Seems to go away with a cold shower, toilet break and some food.
2) When I get a good sleep I will most likely have morning wood. When I don't get a good sleep I won't.
3) Coffee seems to give me a great initial boost in energy but creates worsening fatigue later on in the day so I am going to try a few days off it, however, this doesn't happen if I add sugar into the coffee which I shouldn't do?

Strange Things To Note
1) I think my libido is 80% back?! I still want a girlfriend and want sex (just a lack of spontaneous thoughts) but it's held back by the fact my Penis isn't up to the standard which I don't know If I'd call this a positive since I'd rather not want it so I wouldn't think about it in this condition.
2) I feel like in the future when my penile health is returned my libido may also return to full force. If I am a hyper responder to the herbs I am afraid I may become a walking sex fiend :eek:

Anyways that's all,
Thanks for your support people I will probably be updating you every 2 weeks instead since I've been reading some stories and staying off anything related to the condition can ease the mind so I will see you all then!

[Mjw1999]

Hi Kurse, thanks for the update.
From experience, sorting out your sleep will recover at least 50% of your symptoms if you can get that sorted to the point your getting 5 or 6 hours you will soon be crushing it in the gym too and at that stage your recovery will start to accelerate. As regards breathing, i always take advantage of a walk beside nature, in the park or something. That’s 3 stress relievers at the same time, exercise, mindfulness of surroundings and breath work.
Just work on increasing those five positives, trying to add one more each week. The achievement will breed positivity which is key.
Keep working hard and stay positive, you’re doing well. Most of this is a psychological recovery once the physical aspects of the protocol are in place.

I crashed in April this year and i would say im 90% recovered having done the protocol 100% since June. It’s only sleep (im at about 6 hrs a night but want 8), libido and erection quality to recover and im sure it’s just the psychological battle left here.

[Kurse]

Thanks for the tip!

I haven't thought about going for walks to clear my head so will definitely start that! I also agree that most of my symptoms are caused by insomnia so I am trying my best to get it sorted, I know it will take a while to get back to a nice baseline but I am just hoping that I can fix it a little bit quicker with some tools. Once sleep is fixed I feel like it will be smooth sailing in terms of recovery!

I'm glad to hear you're 90% recovered!! Only a little while longer for you then, Keep at it I'll be waiting for that recovery post :cool:

I will gladly share tips If I can discover something that may help along my journey!

[Mjw1999]

Well life already feels back to normal apart from the few remaining symptoms and the protocol is just part of my life now without thinking about it. I’m positive in the next 12 months ill be at full recovery.
You will be sharing tips soon, im sure of that.

[Kurse]

Small Side Note

I've had a few AHA moments where I have discovered a few things so this is just to document them so I don't forget!

Essentially, I started NoFap and around Day 5 my flaccid size Has been fluctuating between average size and slightly narrower and having better rigidity 70% of the time! Also, my testicles seem to be slightly bigger but I didn't measure so I couldn't tell. Therefore, me being human thought I would try fapping I bet you can guess what happened... It went back to how it was before. So A note would be NEVER to fap! It seems to be a game-changer for me!

Also, I tried coffee again today and am coincidentally having worse fatigue than I had before which I hadn't experienced to that degree since I stopped drinking it so I will have to cut this out completely until I can tolerate it.

Finally, Goji Berries seem to do wonders for my mental health. Soon after taking them, my anxiety eases up quite a considerable amount and I actually feel kind of euphoric and am able to laugh more and forget the situation I am in. Definitely another game-changer for my recovery.

[Kurse]

Quick question, This may be random but I might try it unless a Vet advises me not to.

So I'm sure you guys have heard about Turkesterone (an ecdysteroid) I've heard that it has absolutely 0 suppression and helps with fatigue, anxiety and brain fog and gym strength and is similar to Ashwagandha but it's backed by very limited data in terms of the benefits it provides.

Hoping it would help my fatigue and maybe help me with my GYM progress.

Do you think it's worth exploring? What are your thoughts?

[LetsGo]

NoFap is pretty big and important. It’s important to resist the urge to “test” things out, and even a little edging tends to lead to ejaculating.

It’s unusual that coffee made you fatigued, I wonder why that would happen. Maybe try decaf and see if that has the same effect?

For the anxiety, it’s important to do the breathing exercise in the morning and evening. Also meditation. I think anyone who is feeling major/medium anxiety every day, will struggle to recover. The breathing exercise manipulates your vagus nerve into calming down, and meditation slowly (over 4 - 6 weeks) builds up your emotional strength so that you’ll feel less anxious in general. Sounds like the goji berry is helping you as well, which is great.

As for Turkesterone, it has been around since the 1970s but doesn’t have strong evidence behind it, in terms of having steroid-like effects with no side effects. I would personally stay away from it because it makes more sense to stick with CD’s list, which is tried and true. Worst case, it could cause a crash or de-rail your progress.

If you want help in the gym, I recommend creatine. (Some guys say it has given them negative effects with PFS, so your mileage may vary.) I take “German Creatine” pills, which are very convenient. Creatine occurs naturally in meat (including your muscles) but by taking the supplement, you can load up with the maximum amount your muscles can hold, which gives you extra strength and endurance in the gym. (Estimated to be 5% - 15%.) This translates into more muscle growth, and therefore more hormonal healing. So if you don’t get negative effects from creatine, take it. Creatine is one of the only supplements that has been researched a lot ON HUMANS (not just mice,) and it definitely works.

Your body’s fuel source is ATP, which turns into ADP as it’s used up. Creatine helps recycle it back into ATP, so you’re able to squeeze out one more rep, or move up to a higher weight sooner. It’s good stuff.

And then as for fatigue, I wouldn’t give up on coffee too quickly. I have my own coffee grinder and stuff, so I can mix the ratio of decaf to regular, which might be an option for you as well.

[Kurse]

Yeah, I won't try fapping again. The urges get quite strong around day 4 but I believe I have enough discipline to stop and think about what I am doing. The last slip-up was a "test" to see how I would feel afterwards. Won't happen again.

I have been doing 3 rounds of wim-hof breathing when waking up and going to sleep. I have been doing meditation about 3x per week only on days when I am feeling particularly bad but I will be increasing the frequency soon. I have also been able to stand in cold showers for 2 minutes on the coldest setting 7x per week which does leave my skin a little red but I feel great so I see no complaints there.

Yeah, I find it quite strange coffee has the opposite effect on me. I will try decaf as per your suggestion and see how it goes.

Will definitely try creatine. I noticed CD once said on someone's post before that he recommends HCL instead of Monohydrate. Is there a particular reason? I see the monohydrate ones seem to be much more available for me to purchase and stock up on. I have also bought a foam roller and begun mobility work and I feel very loose and it's refreshing.

Good News!

For 1 week straight, I have regained morning erections at dare I say 90-100% Quality that would stick around for 5-10 minutes. They began on the day I took the Goji Berry and I have done my Herb cycle only 2x so far but I can say for certain symptoms ease up when I take it.

Glycine & Magnesium have helped my sleep so much as well. I have gone from about 1-3 hours per night to 5-6 and can get back to sleep for another 1 hour usually which is always nice. Still have a little bit of fatigue but it's not as drastic as it was previously!!!

Mental health wise I am still anxious but not to the level I'd call unbearable as I had before starting the protocol.

Thank you for helping me so far @LetsGo I really appreciate the help!

Edit:

I am also looking at buying some pro-hormones for future use and would like some input if that's okay.

I was looking at Ultra Hard by Iconic Formulations. I have heard about R-Andro being the best but I can't find a supplier in the UK so I will probably get Ultra Hard. I've also been looking at Alpha Four too but it seems to be on back-order at the moment so I will buy it in the future.

I obviously will not use these Prohormones for a couple more months on protocol but I think having them stocked would be wise since I believe they are bought up fairly quickly.

Thanks again :)

[Kurse]

Hey guys I know I have been posting a little bit frequently and I am sorry about that but I just wanted to update my regimen:

* Means recently added

Herbs I Own So Far:
Tongkat Ali*, Horny Goat Weed*, Rhodiola*, Tribulus, Goji Berry, Suma Root, Cordyceps, Maca, Suma Root, Ashwaganda.
Royal Jelly - 1500mg - Every Other Day
Pine Pollen Powder - 1-2 Teaspoons - Every Day
Iodine - 1x Per Week - Low Dose

Supplements:
Vitamin D3 - 4000IU - Every Day
Fish Oil - 2000mg - Every Day
L-Theanine - 400mg - Every Day
Magnesium - 400mg - Every Night
Glycine - 3g - Every Night
*Creatine - 5000mg - Every Day

Exercise:
Heavy Lifting - 3x Per Week - 8-10 Reps Per Set
HIIT Hill Sprints - 1x Per Week - 6-8 sets
Foam Rolling - 3x Per Week - Before Workout

Wellbeing:
Wim-Hof Breathing - Morning/Night - 3 Rounds
Mediation - 3x Per Week - 15 minutes - using the App "Balance" since I got 1 year free.
Cold Showers - 2 Minutes - Coldest Setting - Every Day
Skin Brushing - Every Day

Diet
Altered Paleo - No Gluten - A fair amount of Dairy (Mostly Milk), No Sugar or Very Small quantities if I can't help it.

Things I am working on:

1) I am planning to get a Bathmate soon but I am aware that you have to be incredibly careful so I will be taking it very slowly.

2) Still swapping out Xenoestrogens from my collection and have slipped up on a few but I did remove a product with SAW PALMETTO!!!

3) Sunning My Body & Boys - Honestly still waiting on more sunshine. Winter in the UK sucks.

4) I still haven't been able to complete a proper Water Fast. I managed 3 days but had to head home to my parents for Christmas and am trying to be secretive about this since I know they will blow it out of proportion. Will probably carry out a proper water fast around mid-January is my next available date.

5) NO FAP is going quite well. I had one slip up or I suppose a "Test" to see whether I would crash and It didn't seem to affect me terribly but I did notice some benefits while doing it so will be going strong for at least 1 month this time!

6) Looking at purchasing ULTRA HARD from Iconic Formulations for future use (Not for another 3 months on protocol and I plan to get labs before I start)

That's it from me, If I am doing anything wrong or if there is anything I could add please feel free to let me know! Thanks again all and Merry Christmas!

[Kurse]

Hey all, I am going to be completely transparent with my journey so I will be Logging downswings and upswings.

Status: Downswing

So I will admit over Christmas I was able to act normal in front of friends and family for the most part but I indulged in some Christmas Pudding since I didn't want to seem rude or different in any way and it definitely triggered a downswing.

I finally realise what it's like to be a woman lol. I have been crying for no reason almost daily for a solid 4 days. Really trying to push through it. Luckily I haven't regressed sexually but my mental state has definitely taken a hit. I am also having long bouts of Anxiety and Depression that last for a long time. For some context pre-fin, It was incredibly rare to find me in a depressed state Like probably once or twice per year if that! Cold showers and Breathing/Mediation help but they don't help for very long at the moment.

Sorry for venting... I know everyone goes through the same stuff I just feel a bit vulnerable right now.

[algernon]

Hi Kurse,

The fun part about all this is the immediate effect food sensitivities will have, as you know. Shit sucks. Rejecting food from friends and family becomes like a hobby for those recovering. And downswings are fucking awful. I'm in one at the moment, too. Genuinely crazy how quick PFS depression can change your thoughts and amplify anxieties. Just gotta push through them. Once you're out the other end, life becomes manageable again. Great work and merry xmas.

[Kurse]

I appreciate the support man. It's a big thing to go through without letting people know what is happening to you. In all honesty, I am still partly in shock from all this but the progress I made gave me hope and reading recovery stories always brings my mood up. I am glad we have a place to help each other when times are tough. Just going to have to tough this one out for a bit and then we shall both be in upswing heaven haha. merry xmas man!

[Kurse]

Status: Upswing

Downswing Lasted: (Night of 25/12/2022 --> Morning of 04/01/2023) - I am from the UK so date/month/year is flipped

Hey guys just want to drop in and say I am feeling quite good. Anxiety and Depression have lifted massively and my junk is hanging normally more often (still fluctuates throughout the day) also my libido seems to be up a tad bit, as I keep getting random urges which are always reassuring. Sleep is still at a consistent 5-6 hours not sure how to break through this. Might increase my Glycine intake and have cold showers at night but it's okay for now. I am also finally able to tolerate caffeine! Thank god! I had my first coffee with L-Theanine and my god, concentration went through the roof. Smashed out a University project in less than a day haha.

I also recieved my bathmate today and before I was going to use It I mascaped and... gave myself a nasty cut at the bottom of my shaft somehow. Will wait for that to heal before I use it also a good deterant from masturbating haha. Shocked me a little bit but I will be okay.

Also the protocol has cleared up my skin quite a bit. Before this I had a poor diet and always had super hot showers along with a shit skincare routine causing moderate acne on my face and back and the protocol has cleared up my skin! and yes I still have oily skin/hair so it's not due to lack of sebum.

I still have hairfall so I know my DHT is still working which is nice. I definately have it easier than some people here... but I did realise that before I took Finasteride I was also taking Fenugreek and using Nizorol Shampoo and a Saw Palmetto shampoo so I am guessing I just completely nuked my system which is why it freaked out so much (Binned all those products now)

Also considering adding NMN/NAD+ to the supplements I am taking. Has anyone had a positive experience with these? I am seeing them recommended more than creatine recently in the bodybuilding scene. I am also really liking the weightlifting... like a lot, do recovered people still run Ultra Hard and does it help with gains?

Improvements:
Moderate ED --> Minor ED
Low Libido --> Fluctuating Libido
Crippling Anxiety --> Slightly Increased Anxiety (Random Panic / Minor Brain Fog)
Always Hard-Flaccid or Rubbery --> (Fluctuating Between Hard Flaccid/Normal/Rubbery) always normal upon waking
Major Sleep Issues --> Minor Sleep Issues
Moderate Concentration --> Brilliant Concentration (I think I must be a hyper responder to L-Theanine + Coffee or something haha) (note: I try to limit caffiene to when I really need it)

That's all from me. Will update you all when I get my next downswing/upswing.

p.s. HIIT is a bitch, absolutely wipes me out haha

[Zerolibido]

Gimp

[Zerolibido]

You're not a gimo.you have done well

All.I need to do as rise out mikd.insomnia
For years I slept eight plus hours and recovered
Then hit eased by bullying
Went to.six hours I panicked but instead of leaving and resetting in 2019 I started smoking and taking seroquel here and there

Fuck man that shifty citizens advice energy-efficient murdered me
I up in court for sending threateningbemeoal

I can't believe it man I had recovered for eight
What's
I should have done TRT

[Zerolibido]

How the fuck Am I meant to.live like this I lived a completely nor.All life between twenty thirteen and Trent y twenty one then first f w months of last year things went downhill
All because undereducated ducking seroquel instead of.leaving that shifty unpaid job and resetting sleep.
Now I have axo level.pfs and I'm too.old
To get better

I'm forty ducking six and there has been no improvement in research they are ducking starting from scratch useless ducking cunt s

I feel like I never had pfs for a decade and now I have extreme pfs

- - - Updated - - -

I.mean I literally went to about one hundred concerts footballlmmatches trips abroad got drunk could sell it off an waank.allday

- - - Updated - - -

I fuck it hate that awor cunt

Ducked off.for five years and only came back when. Untangling through thatbhell at that shifty charity

[Zerolibido]

Do you think this is reversible for eberyone?

[Zerolibido]

Should I off myself.butch?