Ricky’s Ride to Baseline & Beyond
Figured I’d make one official thread for my progress. Don’t want to start any more threads & keep it all here. Officially..
**as you all already read a few times I crashed late March, but started protocol immediately about 5 days later..Progress has been slim to none so far.. Just riding this thing out. Any upswing is more on the mental & mood side, downswings are depression, anxiety, terrible thoughts.(going through one right now) but this time it’s not as severe as my last time mentioning this where I burst into tears a few times, but still sucks. The physical things I ignore but it’s all there. I have it all.
*As far as my sides go, if I’m being real I’m more of the worse cases of this thing, my nose got smaller & I did not notice this initially ..Weird..
*but I’m glad that I started protocol days after. I’m just thankful I began the process. I know I could have been stuck in limbo for months & years on end, potentially causing me to quit my job or end up in the hospital or something..I got on here ASAP & been on it. So it’s all about perspective on that end.
**There might have been extremely small improvements, maybe..I really don’t know, I really can’t tell, my downswing brain is typing this...but I’m just so level headed with this thing that I don’t really congratulate myself for any minuscule victory I have.
My Struggles—
Putting timelines in my head & comparing my severity of these symptoms to others & seeing how long they been on this. Example below
- Once I saw Durantula’s older thread where he mentioned the thing about the nose shrinkage, I saw that he’s been on this for more than a year, BUT he has felt Herbs early.... So in my head I went “well guess we are gonna have this thing for 3-6 years.” Then that turns to me thinking “will I even be recovered by the time I’m 27, or 30” (I just turned 23) crazy mental game going on. Then I check out Jacknaps thread & see that he’s been having sex from the start & he’s in Good place at the year mark..I sometimes take this whole thing like A 8-10 year jail sentenced based on how bad off I am.. I sometimes ask my dad how he got through his 5 year jail sentence which is like time stopping basically.. not really an accurate comparison to this type of thing but you know what I mean..
-Second Guessing
This is my second struggle but I don’t let it deter me from the regimen. Why do I second guess?? Two reasons besides it just being part of the game..
1. Money is tight so it’s tough buying organic or grass fed or wild caught...But I’ve been following the outline diet wise..I’ve been drinking organic Kefir daily bought from the store, it’s sometimes flavored (Coconut) but it has 15g added sugar. It has tons of probiotic cultures though. Again, i see people making homemeade kefir so I’m thinking that buying this from the store is not good for me. I can’t afford the organics, wild caughts, etc..*
* I eat all the food outlined with pretty much zero regard to timing & portions.. it’s all Paleo w/ Greek yoghurt,kefir, & cheese. Haven’t cheated, haven’t strayed. Obviously won’t..
2. I’m second guessing the way I went about my water fast back in March cause I feel nothing in regards to Herbs. Reminder I did a 21 day unsupervised fast which is not recommended. (225 lbs to 169) The fact that I did not do it at the clinic makes me believe I’ve started the whole thing wrong.. I worked while I fasted but that was it, just rested & cold showers..
I take 3g of Pine Pollen in the morning & sometimes take 1 or 2 of the Pine Pollen capsules at night. (Along with the rotation & daily supps ) Doesn’t the fast help you become more receptive to all this?.
* I see a lot of you feel this stuff early (which adds on to me thinking I’m gonna beat this in 4+ years, not the standard 6 months to 2.5 years) I swear I feel like I’m gonna be fighting this longer than CD did..
-despite lifting heavy, doing 150 yd sprints 2x a week, & one day of jumping & plyometrics, I’ve been gaining weight. After my fast I was 169 lbs. I’m like 185-188 now.. I haven’t started backloading cause of this.. what’s the deal?
* I am performing well in the gym strength wise for my state especially on Lower body lifts, im actually getting close to my pre Fin strength..It seems harder to get stronger on the upper body stuff for me, those gains come slower & I plateau more. All this despite the soft tissues from lack of DHT & less sweating etc..
Intense exercise, cold showers, breathing exercises, & listening to Opie & Anthony radio while I work (it’s comedy) is the only thing keeping me Sane these days. I also have not ejaculated or fapped since the crash.. not that i really had the desire to though. I plan on not busting a single nut for years. It’s a goal..
Lastly..
Look this forum has saved me. But I read a ton of your guys progress/ideas & my head starts to spin.
On one end I’m hearing that the outline is simple & eventually you get there with herbs, cold showers, diet, exercise, meditation, & optional prohormones.. rinse & repeat.. I’d put guys like CD & Maxout on this side of the spectrum. Even that Damn guy in a way is on this side
On the other end, the Jacknaps of the world & others (no disrespect lol) it’s all this outside stuff that makes me lose it. A lot of people make this toooooo cutting edge which leaves the guys who try to keep it as Simple as possible & just getting through the day in a state of doubt & confusion.
Thank you all though...& gauging where I’m at, I think September I’ll start cycling the prohormones . I thought I can get through this with herbs only, but based on my symptoms, I feel like it’s necessary. We’ll get there though..
I get it, damn rick relax.. lol, but your input is much appreciated. At my age, with my whole life ahead of me, the days are LONG..
Ricky’s Ride to Baseline & Beyond
Whassup guys. So I just ordered the R Andro & plan on cycling next month. September 1st exactly. I still want to go on one more 21 day rotation with herbs. Still don’t see much sexually or physically but my mental is just better. I’m social, more stable, cracking jokes , enjoying music, etc..
I haven’t been carb backloading but once I’m in cycle I’ll add that in. Should help..
Currently while eating paleo I tested my max lifts for the first time last week, as I’ve been gaining strength super fast it’s ridiculous, I know these herbs are contributing to this big time. I just worked up to a max & left the gym. These sessions were 25 min max, no point in continuing the workout after this. I’m 183 lbs right now.
Deadlift: 555
Squat: 410
Bench: 280
In addition my performance sprinting seems to be improving slightly.
My only 2 questions are anything else to take with the prohormones? I’m hearing things like potassium. Not worried, just on my P’s and Q’s with this thing.
In addition, I plan on doing a mini juice feast while still taking herbs during the last week of August, my idea is I’m killing 2 birds with one stone
1. Taking a week off from lifting, powerlifters call these deload weeks to rest your nervous system & prevent overtraining. I do it every 3-4 months.
2. Increase receptivity to the cycle.
^ Let me know if I’m on to something about that mini fast or is it a stupid idea.
Thank you all.
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Ricky’s Ride to Baseline & Beyond
Honestly no, but I jumped into the cold shower & meditated for most of the day. Cried a few times though which is good I guess. Emotions are emotions.
Have not been consistent with breathing & meditating. Everything else has been dialed in.
I called out from work today & decided to leave lifting for tomorrow. My energy was so shot. I see the fear in my dads eyes & man it’s rough. It’s a cycle that makes me feel even worse.
Your right about the mental game. It’s easily the Hardest thing for me, the discipline of all this is easy. Lifting, herbs, supps, diet.. it’s no problem for me. I would put my head down for a couple of weeks, & I guess the weight of everything creeps up. The isolation, knowing all my friends are having fun etc. everything i do in my life basically reminds me of my PFS. in everything I do the symptoms come up, especially neurologically. the floaters & the clumsiness.. But I have been consistent since . Unfortunately I broke my nofap streak from March 25th. Frustrated for that moment of weakness. I live in NYC, so everything I want back is constantly in my face.
USUALLY hitting PR’s on lifts was all I looked forward to, if there’s anything I’m grateful for is that I’m physically strong as a bull.. I mean I’m approaching hitting 500x10 on my DL already..I’m becoming a beast pretty quick..today I just did not care for it honestly. It’s wild. I’m searching for something to be grateful for at the moment.
I keep getting caught up in the timeline of things as well. Don’t know why I’m
Thinking about 2020,2021. the way my brain is right now, I can’t fucking stand it. I just want to close my eyes & want it to be 2025. I know Mileage may vary. But holy hell what’s my mileage? I have no idea .I know people get significantly better in a year or so, but man at this moment I see this as a 5 year process for me. Hate that feeling of recovery not being possible to me....on top of it all, me getting into these thought patterns makes me think it’s hindering my progress. I just need to get into that not worrying mode.
^^ I get it, very irrational, borderline whiny, actually extremely whiny..... I know we are not about that, but I had to get my thoughts out somewhere. I’ve been faking it for a bit. My dad is literally the only thing pushing me.
Hopefully this means a new, higher baseline, cause this setback is big.
Hopefully my cycle in Sept gives me a jolt.
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Ricky’s Ride to Baseline & Beyond
Will incorporate it. Thanks again.
Now get outta here & keep fucking 20 year olds for me .
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Ricky’s Ride to Baseline & Beyond
Thanks guys. Appreciate it
Really trying my best at work right now to buckle down. I’m going through the darkest periods of this thing thus far.
Has me confused cause I thought the downswings over time become less severe?
Tired of thinking.
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Re: Fasting destroys mental symptoms for lots of guys.
Mental was worst but I had 30-40 symptoms, so who knows all pretty fkn bad. Fasting a long ass time fixed a lot but not all. Near all, all the 10/10 bad mental symptoms. Well, I mean the refeed too:
---> (estimated: For sure 30-31 days water, and 19-25 juice, but did not break some juice feasts all that great. 14-20 days I did.). So 50+, but maybe 44+ clean refeed, and perfect refeed at end of 20days which was right after 5d or 6days (pre 20days). If you know what I'm saying.
--> From my log. Added it in there, did not initially bc did not want to think about failure.
-"1. Introduction:
Hey everyone. What's happening? I attempted some juice feasting and breuss fasting. Mostly I messed up.
Then I did a 20 day fast - explained in a later post. -As well as 5d and 6d right before. So 31days and 14-21 Juice Feasting (like CD recommends for many).
-so like: 45day to 52. Probably a bit more, but WATER FASTING WAS KEY."
I am working on healing from PFS and getting back my health and mental acuity. I am working on my own protocol with additions from various members here, and eventually getting to something else that will be explained later.
-I was more and more like myself 45 days into refeed. And all else. -Should have just fasted 80 days. JK, hard, would kill a lot of people.
-Excellent job @RickTheRuler, IIRC you fasted 21days on water straight. Damn Good Job Man.
-Trying to help a friend who is a bit taller and way skinnier so he can gain, do raw foods a long time, and then fast or use ARL/TEI.
Ricky’s Ride to Baseline & Beyond
Hey ya’ll. Pretty much having a bad day so I have lots of questions.
I recently ran out of Pine Pollen & been replacing it with the Tincture for now while rotating the rest. Cool? Just waiting for my Potassium Chloride to get here in a few days so I can begin R Andro.
In addition I haven’t been taking Shilajit daily though. It’s part of my 21 day rotation but lurking around I found out we take this daily?
I buy organic kefir from the store (it’s flavored) it has some sugar in it. Is this something I should remove? I have it basically everyday with my dinner.
I know questioning things serve us no good, but did the way I went about my water fast back in March hinder anything for me in regards to my results? Reason I ask is cause mostly everyone did a juice feast. At the time, I thought water fasting was my only option so I kind of blindly did it. (Before I signed up here from March 31-April 20)
I did it unsupervised & for the first part of it I was pretty scared & in a extremely bad state. I also worked for the 21 days. I went from 220-165. My refeed wasn’t so organized as well for the few days after. I just ate watermelon & cantaloupes for a few days., then I got on the herbal rotation/diet & started lifting. I ask cause at times I think that the way I did it potentially hinders any results I’m looking to have. I never took pharms or anything like that through this whole ordeal.. it’s just weird to me cause others here have used pharms, ate like shit & did tons of things & seem to get some type of results rather quickly when they come off. I’ve been clean & I haven’t had that breakthrough type of feeling yet.
other thing is, I eat all kinds of meat, seafood, veggies, & fruit. It’s NOT all organic, in fact most of it isn’t. I simply cannot afford it or have access to it where I live..i see a lot of you guys are cutting edge with the food quality, some of you are 110% organic, grass fed, wild caught etc.. so me not doing that also feels like I’m holding myself back.
Is there a difference between a downswing & crashing? how does it feel to recrash yourself. My downswings seem bad at first which I know is on par for the course but I want to know what’s the difference between that & the bad reaction a PFS guy gets from alcohol, gluten that sets him back. I wanna know that what I go through are downswings & not crashes you know??
Maybe this is all in my head since I’m having a down day. But it’d be great to hear from you guys regarding these points. I’m at the 4-5 month mark so I’m feeling kind of nervous. my impatience is getting a little grip on me.
I’m working so hard.
Thanks!
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Ricky’s Ride to Baseline & Beyond
Hellish downswing.. & this one seems so long. Breathing gives me some relief but only for a bit.
Gotta ride this shit out!
I’m working on trying to just get away from forums & all this talk. It’s easily the #1 thing for me
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Ricky’s Ride to Baseline & Beyond
I’m sick. Past 2 days have a runny nose, pink eye with discharge coming out.. part of the process?? I do sprints today, should I hold out & just lay down?
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Ricky’s Ride to Baseline & Beyond
Fellas.
This is minor, but I do have this skin fungus type thing on my body & it’s widespread (tinea versicolor) it sounds way worse than what it is, but it’s not that serious. I had this pre PFS & people in my race (Dominican) seem to have this a lot especially when it gets hot and humid in the summer ..it’s more noticeable when you tan.. due to the hormonal changes PFS causes it has become more widespread all over. I had left this unchecked for years cause like I said it’s not that serious.. but now it’s looking pretty crazy I admit from a cosmetic perspective. I’m multicolored on my body lol.
I obviously will not take antibiotics or pills or anything, but are there any antifungal paraben free shampoos out there that I could use that won’t affect me negatively? so i could at least keep it at bay.
Thank you hoes
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Ricky’s Ride to Baseline & Beyond
Question for future reference & navigating through this thing.
How is it with PDE5 inhibitors with our condition? Do you still fail sexually with them? I mean, even if it’s numb at times & doesn’t feel pleasurable I would be willing to use it if i can just get a decent rod.
If it’s not a guarantee to work then I won’t even bother.
Sexually I do get some spontaneous semi erections, seems like i have to do a lot of “working up” to get it going.. I do wake up with morning wood if I sleep well & enough hours which is most of the time
Basically would a PDE5 make me have sex successfully even with PFS.
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Ricky’s Ride to Baseline & Beyond
I’ve been ignoring this for sometime. I’ve been having a lot of gas that’s been smelling horrible. I don’t get it though, I really haven’t strayed from my diet. Here’s a typical day for me.
AM: eggs, bacon, salad, broccoli
Yogurt with blueberries, strawberries, pineapple
Lunch: tuna, eggs, mozzarella, salad, broccoli
Pre workout : shake from juice bar w/ spirulina.
Dinner: usually a steak or salmon with salad. Kefir.
Throw in fruits or nuts in between these meals randomly.
Really don’t get it.
Things like this are really frustrating. Is this type of thing holding me back or is it something I have to just work through & it will fix itself once I’m hormonally better? My concern is that me being gassy means that somethings up with my gut & it’s hindering progress.
I see after every cycle Bizzbee’s gut seemed to improve. I’m very confused. I’ve been on the straight & narrow throughout this.
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Ricky’s Ride to Baseline & Beyond
I could do it.
Do these problems hold us back from recovery? Or is it just a result of hormonal imbalances.
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Ricky’s Ride to Baseline & Beyond
Yeah man. I mean I only have real worries with this if it hinders progress.. If it’s just hormonal issues causing downstream effects then I’ll continue forward. It’s just annoying at times.
That’s my real question. Can we even get better if this thing is going on?
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Ricky’s Ride to Baseline & Beyond
Thanks guys. The answer is simple as riding out & make little modifications. But generally stick to the plan.
I’m sick of waiting though.. I’m gonna start carb back loading after heavy deadlifts Friday, & I’m gonna gear up for a Andro run December 1. I mean it this time lol..Then it’s gonna be rinse & repeat with that & the herbs indefinitely. Forever. I’ve had ups and downs thus far but I seem to be better from where I first was...
I’m deff strong enough, I lift 3x a week & my workouts are insane.. (all the more reason to add carbs)
I’m throwing around 300,400,500,600 lbs in the gym & I’ve been straight paleo, maybe my body is craving it big time. & I do 150 yard uphill sprints with a 30 lb vest on. Powerful aggressive shit. Lord knows what will happen on cycle strength wise.
I’m keeping my expectation very low tho..there are some guys who started to feel things on their 4th cycle, but felt nothing the first 3...cause as we all know everything is working behind the scenes. A nice jolt would be great though. Hopefully adding gluten free carbs & hormones shocks my body in a positive way. Miss pasta & all that stuff.
I wonder if there’s some guy out there who needed 10 cycles to recover.
I don’t care how I feel on these runs. I’m running them anyway as the purpose is to regain 5ar function. I’ve read enough of your guys posts to understand the process. Still gotta experience it though for myself.
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Ricky’s Ride to Baseline & Beyond
Did some hiit on flat ground for the first time in a while.. been only doing weighed uphill sprints for the longest to be more of a badass. I got so used to running up hills i forgot how it was to just run.
Tested it out, just me and the football field, no incline l, no added weight ..... & Boy, I’m fast.. .....as fuck. I guess it’s the physics of me being just as strong/powerful as I was pre pfs at 230 lbs but packed in to a 190 ish lb leaner frame instead. I have big man strength in a relatively smaller body which helps with my power in stride, plus I’m just sprinting consistently with the vest and uphills which alone would help of course.. but being very strong for your body weight has a correlation to your athleticism.,
It’s 30 degrees in NYC & I did it shirtless... I credit this to the cold showers making me immune to the winter elements. Cold just does not bother me like it used to. Is this expected for from consistent cold exposure?
Lifting hard for strength & sprints with some type of resistance whether it’s with a vest or uphill is a good combo to get your speed up. Trust me
-Ricky the gazelle
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