In need of serious help

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04-22-2022
GoldenSun

In need of serious help

For the past 3 months, the protocol stopped working on me. I was feeling so much better in November - Jan, Serious improvements on depression along with a very predictable libido up and down. I felt like I had control over my life again and my body would have ups and downs but with a general trend up. I had moments with great libido and moments of euphoria while on my first cycle. But ever since around 2-3 months ago it has been a downward trend. I still have had days with good libido but my lord I don't know what is going on. Symptoms of extreme depression and anxiety creeped back in.

During my second pro hormone run I felt nothing and so I stopped pre-maturely. I have been in hell over the last 3 months. My improvements in the beginning were amazing. I went from hopeless to hope filled. I was actually at a point in December where I worried because my life felt livable (just muted) and I was worried I would "put up with it" and kinda just let PFS fade to the back of my memory. I worried about this because while life was livable again, it wasn't as good as before PFS and I didn't want to put up with mediocrity. Now PFS is on my mind 24/7 because I am truly suffering again.

I recently talked to some people who have gotten cured from the protocol, so I know it can happen. This protocol is seriously my only hope in life. I pray I see an upswing because living in the hellish depressed state I am living in is not life at all.

Let me explain, the libido and ed are one thing but the anhedonia is another beast. When I had my upswing in Nov-Jan my libido was not as good as before PFS and I still had ED, but what made life livable was how I felt. I could enjoy music again, I could enjoy gaming again, I could enjoy books again, I could enjoy sun and nature again. Though I enjoyed these things through a "blurry filter" I still had feeling again. For whatever reason for the last few months I had that soul crushing anhedonia hit again and it makes life unbearable. I have read so many logs on this site they all kinda blend, but I cant remember anyone else who has suffered through a multi-month down swing. This makes me worry that the protocol is not going to work for me. But for every negative thought I do remember those who were cured. I'm just in a horrible spot right now. I just want to feel like I'm making progress again.

On a good note. My erectile shrinkage I mentioned in the past has gotten better again.
04-22-2022
PashaSolid

Quote:

Originally Posted by GoldenSun

For the past 3 months, the protocol stopped working on me. I was feeling so much better in November - Jan, Serious improvements on depression along with a very predictable libido up and down. I felt like I had control over my life again and my body would have ups and downs but with a general trend up. I had moments with great libido and moments of euphoria while on my first cycle. But ever since around 2-3 months ago it has been a downward trend. I still have had days with good libido but my lord I don't know what is going on. Symptoms of extreme depression and anxiety creeped back in.

During my second pro hormone run I felt nothing and so I stopped pre-maturely. I have been in hell over the last 3 months. My improvements in the beginning were amazing. I went from hopeless to hope filled. I was actually at a point in December where I worried because my life felt livable (just muted) and I was worried I would "put up with it" and kinda just let PFS fade to the back of my memory. I worried about this because while life was livable again, it wasn't as good as before PFS and I didn't want to put up with mediocrity. Now PFS is on my mind 24/7 because I am truly suffering again.

I recently talked to some people who have gotten cured from the protocol, so I know it can happen. This protocol is seriously my only hope in life. I pray I see an upswing because living in the hellish depressed state I am living in is not life at all.

Let me explain, the libido and ed are one thing but the anhedonia is another beast. When I had my upswing in Nov-Jan my libido was not as good as before PFS and I still had ED, but what made life livable was how I felt. I could enjoy music again, I could enjoy gaming again, I could enjoy books again, I could enjoy sun and nature again. Though I enjoyed these things through a "blurry filter" I still had feeling again. For whatever reason for the last few months I had that soul crushing anhedonia hit again and it makes life unbearable. I have read so many logs on this site they all kinda blend, but I cant remember anyone else who has suffered through a multi-month down swing. This makes me worry that the protocol is not going to work for me. But for every negative thought I do remember those who were cured. I'm just in a horrible spot right now. I just want to feel like I'm making progress again.

On a good note. My erectile shrinkage I mentioned in the past has gotten better again.

Remember how good you felt for those 3 months. That means it’s achievable. It’s been only 7 months since you started this journey. I’d advise you to Stick with it
04-22-2022
Turnover25

Quote:

Originally Posted by GoldenSun

For the past 3 months, the protocol stopped working on me. I was feeling so much better in November - Jan, Serious improvements on depression along with a very predictable libido up and down. I felt like I had control over my life again and my body would have ups and downs but with a general trend up. I had moments with great libido and moments of euphoria while on my first cycle. But ever since around 2-3 months ago it has been a downward trend. I still have had days with good libido but my lord I don't know what is going on. Symptoms of extreme depression and anxiety creeped back in.

During my second pro hormone run I felt nothing and so I stopped pre-maturely. I have been in hell over the last 3 months. My improvements in the beginning were amazing. I went from hopeless to hope filled. I was actually at a point in December where I worried because my life felt livable (just muted) and I was worried I would "put up with it" and kinda just let PFS fade to the back of my memory. I worried about this because while life was livable again, it wasn't as good as before PFS and I didn't want to put up with mediocrity. Now PFS is on my mind 24/7 because I am truly suffering again.

I recently talked to some people who have gotten cured from the protocol, so I know it can happen. This protocol is seriously my only hope in life. I pray I see an upswing because living in the hellish depressed state I am living in is not life at all.

Let me explain, the libido and ed are one thing but the anhedonia is another beast. When I had my upswing in Nov-Jan my libido was not as good as before PFS and I still had ED, but what made life livable was how I felt. I could enjoy music again, I could enjoy gaming again, I could enjoy books again, I could enjoy sun and nature again. Though I enjoyed these things through a "blurry filter" I still had feeling again. For whatever reason for the last few months I had that soul crushing anhedonia hit again and it makes life unbearable. I have read so many logs on this site they all kinda blend, but I cant remember anyone else who has suffered through a multi-month down swing. This makes me worry that the protocol is not going to work for me. But for every negative thought I do remember those who were cured. I'm just in a horrible spot right now. I just want to feel like I'm making progress again.

On a good note. My erectile shrinkage I mentioned in the past has gotten better again.

Hey bro! I can weigh in here. Same thing happened to me. After one of my cycles I got nailed with severe anhedonia, extreme empty feeling with zero libido or anything, and it lasted months. I don’t run prohormones anymore because it happens each time I run them.

You’ll get out of it eventually, it lasted more than 3 months for me. Hang in there bud, I’m feeling a lot better now.
04-23-2022
Ratchet_V2

Just dropping in as well – I had periods of months @ a time where I felt exactly as you do right now. I even mention it in my thread, I believe it was Jan - Apr last year. You still have some time to go – it was 1.5 years before I started to truly experience general, consistent improvement. It also took significant changes and improvements in other areas of my life i.e work, relationships, etc. to move me in that direction. Don’t forget that PFS is not your only enemy, and that life comes with all of its other challenges as well. It’s easy to chalk those difficulties and problems up to PFS, as if you would be easily able to deal w them if you weren’t sick from fin. That’s not the case, and everyday, healthy people go through them all the same. Don’t neglect the other parts of living, and improving those areas will improve your health and well-being too!
04-23-2022
Thetfordboy

Quote:

Originally Posted by Turnover25

Hey bro! I can weigh in here. Same thing happened to me. After one of my cycles I got nailed with severe anhedonia, extreme empty feeling with zero libido or anything, and it lasted months. I don’t run prohormones anymore because it happens each time I run them.

You’ll get out of it eventually, it lasted more than 3 months for me. Hang in there bud, I’m feeling a lot better now.

How close do you think you are to full recovery? Whats your lingering symptoms?
04-23-2022
Turnover25

Quote:

Originally Posted by Thetfordboy

How close do you think you are to full recovery? Whats your lingering symptoms?

I’m doing great, but it doesn’t matter where I’m at. Don’t compare yourself to me cuz I’ve been here for years and have seen the worst of it, and I’m fine. And you will be too. Get out of your head and don’t think about it so much.
05-02-2022
Cdsnuts

The time line is the same for all men .....usually 6mo-2yrs.......@ 100%.....everyday......until it doesn't exist anymore. That's it...........longer if you fuck around.
08-11-2023
Zerolibido

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cdsnuts

The time line is the same for all men .....usually 6mo-2yrs.......@ 100%.....everyday......until it doesn't exist anymore. That's it...........longer if you fuck around.

What if you take seroquel erratically, your dock and balls shrunk and die and you !is a twenty kg? Like alongside everywhere