Helpisontheway to recovery log

I think my problem stem back from 2010 when I was masturbating with a condom and gripped the base to climax and felt a short pain next day I had a meet up with my out of state gf at the time & tried to have sex and it was hard to keep an erection thought it was from anxiety tried days later and still couldn’t penetrate and penis seem different in flaccid state. Went to gnc got multiman vitamins with saw palmetto in it. after she left town was nervous about my sexual health scheduled doctor appointment for hormone panel & went to urologist who all said that nothing was wrong with me. have ALL the symptoms of PFS kept going to doctor about hormones with the same outcome. find out about sexual exhaustion, no fap, etc kept thinking my issue was because of low hormones. had hair analysis to say I was missing mineral and adrenals etc

fast forward to 2013 & 4k in debt got tired of going to doctors & looking at forum post with no hope. just said fuck it went on with life met my now current gf 2013 started sex back up 2015 and till 2018 . even when I tried to forget about issue I still had constant pelvic pain & my flaccid penis has steady been shrinking more. I have moved in with gf and never told her about this issue. she never seen my pre pfs flaccid to think otherwise. I looked into drenal fatigue info which lead me to nofap & updated links about people who cured HF/pfs/

I been so many routes , sexual exhaustion, nofap over masturbation, hormone panels naturopaths, nutritionist. 8 years im 33 now. Think im gonna tell my gf whats goin on with me because im all out of options.

here’s old labs from 2010-11 , I even had more test ran for hormones & minerals etc in 2014
Aug 2010
Total Testosterone
410 Range 300-1080
SHBG
20 Range 11-80
Testosterone Free
96 Range 47-244
Testosterone % Free
2.3 Range 1.6-2.9
TSH
0.63 Range 0.36-43.9

Sept 2010
Estradiol 55pg (13-54)
FSH 3.5 (1.6-8.0)
LH 6.3 (1.5-9.3)
Free T3 1.27 (0.93-1.70)
TSH 0.67 (0.27-4.20)
Prolactin 5.2 (2.0-18.0)
Free Testosterone 117.2 pg (35.0-155.0)
% Free Testosterone 2.47 % (1.5-2.2)
total test 475 (250 - 1100)

Nov 2010
Estradiol 67 (13-54)
FSH 3.4 (1.6-8.0)
LH 6.6 (1.5-9.3)
Free Testosterone 106.8 (35. - 155.0)
% Free Testosterone 2.15% (1.5-2.2)
total Testosterone 497 (250-1100)
Vitamin D 25h 33 (30-100)
magnesium 1.96 (1.6-2.2)
Cortisol am 20.11 (6.2-19.4)
DHEA Sulfate 293 (110-510)

started bioidentical testosterone cream in Jan 2011 stopped after 3 weeks made shrinkage of penis/scrotum/and testicles worser.
FEb 2011
Testosterone total 322 (241-827)
Free Test 9.0 (6.0-27.0)
SHBG 16 ( 13-71)
Gonadortropin 5.0 (4.0-8.0)
PSA 0.5
Cortisol 5 (2-25)
FSH 6.9 (1.3-11.4)
Progesterone 0.5 (.15-1.15)
Prolactin 2.5 (3.0-30.0)
Free t4 1.26 (.73-1.95)
TSH 0.8 (.3-5.1)
Free t3 3.3 (2.3-4.2)
estradiol 22.1 (10 - 42)
estrone 10.7 (9-36)
total estrogens 32.8 (19-69)

March 2011 Saliva Test
progesterone 89 (5-95pg/ml)
androstenedione 480 (151-350 pg /ml)
testosterone >200 (60-110 pg/ml)
dht >125 (22-72 pg/ml)
estrone 88 (30-58 pg/ml)
estradiol 7 (1-3pg/ml)
FSH >750 (<125 uiu/ml)
LH >250 (10-25 uiu/ml)
cortisol
6-8 am 10 (13-24)
11-1pm 11(5-10)
4-5pm 6 (3-8 )
10- midnight 3 (1-4)
dhea >25 (3-10 ng/nil)

March 2011 bloodwork 300iu shot, then 200iu of hcg daily for about a week, 2 weeks later
total test 584

April 2011 one 400mg shot of Test E
total t 1490 (250-1100)
free t 410 (35.0-155)
tsh 0.400 (0.340-4.820)

May 2011
free t4 1.46 (0.73-1.95)
TSH 1.3 (0.3-5.1)
Estradiol 38 (<63)
FSH 6.2 (1.3-11.4)
LH 8.0 (1.2-7.8 )
prolactin 5.7 (3.0-30.0)
testoosterone 511 (241-827)
shbg 23 (13-71)
free t 13.0 (6.0- 27.0)
IGF-I 333 (116-358)
dhea 288 (240-549)
vitamin d3 93 (30-100)
psa 0.6 (<4.0)

here are some out of range items
cholesterol 214 (<200)
LdL chol 153 (<100)
ratio LDL/HDL 3.72 (<3.55)

blood count
rbc 6.52 (4.10-11.0)
hematocrit 51.8 (37-49)
MCV 79.4 (80–100)
MCH 25.9 (27-34)
neutrophils 38 (40-74)
lymphocytes 49 (19-48 )

when my penis was semi still decent when I first started having problems.

my penis currently now seem like my testicles and penis are going inside my body on a daily basis

current flaccid penis december 2012

Link removed

nov 2018 linked removed