yeah I guess I'm one foot in the door, one foot in the grave. I have no needle anxiety, did growing up something fierce then army and about 10 hours of tattoos killed that. Ironically my current doc for some ungodly reason wont let me do home pin and wont check E levels which is pissing me off.

Before that I didn't use PH or think about "gear" as I went to drug tested meets (that actually did have testing) so I had a reason not to. Now though even though the HRT is just supposed to get me to normal levels you get the stigma associated with you. And I've found I'm not invited back to some of those meets (most) which prompted the recent PH cycles. And "guest" lifter status as I respect that its intended to be as natural as possible and I don't want to stomp somebody who may be following the rules. BEsides theres lots of guys who are way better then me and I prefer to be at those meets. I just feel the competition brings out the best in me.

A few of the guys have tren, which it would be between tren, or just straight test. Possibly trest in there as well. With some kind of AI. I still need to learn some more and I know my composition isnt optimal. Plus I'm still making good strength gains without so... we shall see.