Turnover25's first cycle of Super R Andro

[Turnover25]

Pretty heavy derealization today. I’ve gotten this on and off since February when I had a severe crash, and was met with a few new symptoms that stuck around, including this one. I’m feeling absolutely zero anxiety, which confuses me since derealization is a defense mechanism for when you’re in a fight or fight situation, which I’m not at all.

Anyways, feeling really calm and relaxed, almost too calm to hit the gym like I’m about to. Went a couple rounds with a girl last night so not sure if ejaculation is the reason I’m feeling so calm or if that’s placebo. Memory kinda hazy as well. Going back down to 400 mg today.


Also just smashed by bench PR with ease. This stuff is a trip.

[Ratchet]

I go through the same thing – and you’re right, but it’s not so much a fight or flight response as it is just general anxiety. It’s not the jizz, I can tell you that. If you’re doing well enough to bag a chick, I’d say you’ve made some serious improvements and might actually be in a really good place. And because you and your body are not used to that, it can trigger underlying anxiety because you’re already anticipating the impending downswing. Whenever things are good for me too, I become hyper vigilant and observing of how I feel because I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop. I feel clear headed and anxiety free as I do this too. But putting yourself in that mode of observation will distance you from the moment and keep you in that DPDR state. Just something to consider and be mindful of. I think with enough upswings and mindfulness we recalibrate and become comfortable in the moment, able to feel grounded and fully present. Keep going dawg.

Also, 8 reps at 245 for 145 lbs is strong as fuck. That’s impressive. We’re going to have to hold the PFS olympics in CDs backyard some day, prohormones allowed.

[Turnover25]

I go through the same thing – and you’re right, but it’s not so much a fight or flight response as it is just general anxiety. It’s not the jizz, I can tell you that. If you’re doing well enough to bag a chick, I’d say you’ve made some serious improvements and might actually be in a really good place. And because you and you’re body are not used to that, it can trigger underlying anxiety because you’re already anticipating the impending downswing. Whenever things are good for me too, I become hyper vigilant and observing of how I feel because I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop. I feel clear headed and anxiety free as I do this too. But putting yourself in that mode of observation will distance you from the moment and keep you in that DPDR state. Just something to consider and be mindful of. I think with enough upswings and mindfulness we recalibrate and become comfortable in the moment, able to feel grounded and fully present. Keep going dawg.

Also, 8 reps at 245 for 145 lbs is strong as fuck. That’s impressive. We’re going to have to hold the PFS olympics in CDs backyard some day, prohormones allowed.

Thanks bro, what’s your derealization like? Not to talk about symptoms, but I’m interested. But you’d be surprised man, if you talked to me in real life, you’d have no idea I’m suffering from some condition severe as this. I hang around my friends all the time, and I’ve made a ton of new friends in the past few months that reach out to me to talk, often times girls, and I get more attention from women than any time in the past 10 years, whether flirting or just general comfort around them, so things are great for me besides that through my eyes the world is surreal. I agree it’s probably just general anxiety, derealization is kinda like when someone tells you “in order for the elephant in the room to leave you have to not think about it” then all you can think about is elephants. If I never crashed, I maybe could have just put off the weirdness of DPDR to being sick or tired, then forgot about it. Harder to do in our situation.

But yeah man, it’s kinda nuts how much stronger R Andro has made me so far. I’ve pushed this kind of weight in the past but not in a long time, and I don’t think I even would have been able to hit what I was repping today even once just a month ago. I read on reddit somewhere where I guy took a similar pro hormone and felt like “someone snuck in the gym the night prior and replaced all the weights with lighter ones” which is a pretty good description lol.

[mcbbould]

Are you in a constant state of derealization or does it only hit you once in a while?

[Turnover25]

Day 24, my anxiety has been completely crushed by this stuff. I just feel calm like I used to, instead of having panic attacks at the drop of a pin, hopefully that sticks around.

Still feeling aggressive/alpha-ish. I haven’t experienced any lethargy or fatigue, I’m pretty sure that’s due to potassium wastage which I have been supplementing plenty of through coconut water and “No-salt” which is a version of salt that is just potassium instead of sodium. Easy to go overboard with though so I am sparing with it.

I slept really well the past couple nights and I’m getting some great workouts in. Excited to see what benefits I see after the cycle is done. I’ll probably go 5 weeks.

Still at 400 mg daily, sometimes 500 mg like today.

Edit: also eating a ton of fruit to replenish glycogen

[Maxout777]

Great to hear things are going well, my man! The strength gains on cycle are always pretty awesome, I have had the same experience. I will say you don't keep all of them when you come off, but you definitely reap the benefits of hammering the weight on cycle.

[Turnover25]

Great to hear things are going well, my man! The strength gains on cycle are always pretty awesome, I have had the same experience. I will say you don't keep all of them when you come off, but you definitely reap the benefits of hammering the weight on cycle.

Dude I’m so surprised by the strength gains haha. Crazy how just hormones can make you stronger. But yeah man Im gaining some nice muscle as well. How long are you going to run the ultra hard?

- - - Updated - - -

Are you in a constant state of derealization or does it only hit you once in a while?

It was constant for over a year, now I think it comes and goes.

Until February it was more of a surreal world view, things not feeling real with visual disturbances, after my crash in February it was stuff like not recognizing my friends or families faces, more severe type DPDR. It’s no longer constant.

[The whit wagon]

Jesus man that sounds fucking scary glad to hear its improving keep up the hard work.
Were all gonna make it.

[Turnover25]

Jesus man that sounds fucking scary glad to hear its improving keep up the hard work.
Were all gonna make it.

It's scary stuff but I had/have no choice but to push through it. I agree my man, we will get there.

[Turnover25]

Almost at week 4, I'm going to continue this cycle at 400 mg until my bottle runs out. Should be a little over 5 weeks by the time I'm done. I feel that now I have gotten through the speed bumps of cycle, such as headaches and depression and now it just keeps getting better. The confidence this stuff can give you is seriously awesome. I went to a bar the other night with some friends, and this cute chick actually bought me a drink after I approached her instead of vice versa, then I was flirting with another girl for quite some time and eventually we were like 2 inches from each others faces in our own little world. I'm not trying to sound like a douche at all, it's just interesting to me the difference you see in your surroundings when you feel confident. That's something that was definitely taken away from me in PFS, it's nice to actually feel your manhood run through your veins again. I've been lusting over women this entire cycle which is something I used to do a lot, I used to be pretty popular with women, and I loved going out and flirting or meeting them. The past year and a half I have had zero desire to do that, so it's nice to feel that way again sometimes. I also just feel like I've gotten more compliments in the past month or so then in the entire last year. There's no doubt that when you feel good, you radiate positive energy that people enjoy being around. I feel a bit more positive about the future after this cycle. When I manage to finally beat this thing, I'm excited to see how good I can feel while applying all these things.

I've been sleeping great also. I don't really want to come off this stuff, but I'm excited to see how I feel once I begin the herbs again. I'll update again soon.

Something I haven't mentioned is my head has itched quite a bit. Also noticed I am definitely losing my hair after looking in the mirror yesterday. Right now it's pretty long/curly but my bald spot is starting to really come in I feel like. Honestly I don't even give a shit. I'll eventually just shave it, get a nice tan and work on getting more jacked. I think the bald look is pretty badass. Wish I felt that way back before I took fin, but oh well. You live and learn.