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  1. #61
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cdsnuts View Post
    That was a good response. I got you.

    And Quebec......damn...you guys get like one month of summer, lol. Beautiful country though. I would go on a ski trip to Tremblant every year for about 20 yrs or so when I was younger. That's where I learned to ski. Cold AF in January.....-40...ever try to ski in -40? Don't.....lol.
    Yeah if "Freezing the boys" was part of the protocol I would probably already be recovered. The winter temperature is brutal but it really makes you appreciate the summer. The vibe in Montreal is crazy during summer. People speak english and french and there's this mix between european and american culture. Ahhh don't get me started I love my city hahah

    I'll do a bloodtest soon and if my E is still low I will order some Alpha Four and run a cycle in July. If my E is in range I will order UltraHard.

  2. #62
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    Hey figured I would an update. Won’t do those frequently but it’s gonna serve as a reminder when I’m in a downswing. It will also give new guys an idea of the progression, rather than simply posting a recovery post at the end.

    In the last week I hung out with 3 different group of friends, and honestly mentally it felt like prePFS. I was relaxed, cracking jokes and had fun. When people asked why I wasn’t drinking I just said it’s because I’m on antibiotics for the summer. People didn’t give a fuck.

    Coopersock’s recovery post really resonated when I was with my friends this afternoon: even if I have PFS, I can have fun with people. Life doesn’t end with PFS, and PFS seems like a much bigger deal when you stay at home focusing on it. Covid clearly doesn’t help, so I would advise people to just dive into plans and hobbies, it really makes you understand that although you are clearly not where you need to be, you are still closer to it than you think.

    And damn, the protocol sure works physically lol . One of my friend sees a girl from Tinder and she came with 6 of her friends, we spent the afternoon at the park. I have always been in good shape but I never received as much compliments. Legit had a girl walk up to me to tell me I’m her type, asking if I squat and saying she loves that I also train my legs. Not saying that to brag or whatever, but just to reinforce the fact that life goes on despite PFS and that good things can happen and I have to appreciate every small thing. Was also vibing with a gorgeous blonde, I preferred chasing her than the other girl. I might have made a mistake tho, she applied tanning lotion on my body, is it fine? First time ever using this stuff, it didn’t contain parabens but maybe it’s still not good protocol-wise. My mom used to tell me it was really bad for your health. I hope it fine lol.

    In the same vein, I was wondering if any OG’s had advice regarding having sex for the first time after PFS. I am at this weird spot where I don’t really have ED, and libido wise I guess I would like to have sex 1-2x/week. However the texture of the skin is still a bit weird, I feel the orgasm coming way too fast, and I don’t know if I have enough libido/mental arousal to get non-contact erections in a real-life situation. I frequently read that getting a ‘’practice girl’’ can be beneficial for recovery, so I would be curious to know how to tackle this situation. The 2 girls from this afternoon would be perfect practice girls lol, they are from British Columbia and spending the summer here.

    Tinnitus is the only symptom I am afraid I might never fix, as I read many people keep it. I could live with it if it's the only thing, it got lower for the last 2 months but I'm striving for greatness so I'd like to kill it.
    Last edited by Outlaw; 05-15-2021 at 08:58 PM.

  3. #63
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    Quote Originally Posted by Outlaw View Post
    Hey figured I would an update. Won’t do those frequently but it’s gonna serve as a reminder when I’m in a downswing. It will also give new guys an idea of the progression, rather than simply posting a recovery post at the end.

    In the last week I hung out with 3 different group of friends, and honestly mentally it felt like prePFS. I was relaxed, cracking jokes and had fun. When people asked why I wasn’t drinking I just said it’s because I’m on antibiotics for the summer. People didn’t give a fuck.

    Coopersock’s recovery post really resonated when I was with my friends this afternoon: even if I have PFS, I can have fun with people. Life doesn’t end with PFS, and PFS seems like a much bigger deal when you stay at home focusing on it. Covid clearly doesn’t help, so I would advise people to just dive into plans and hobbies, it really makes you understand that although you are clearly not where you need to be, you are still closer to it than you think.

    And damn, the protocol sure works physically lol . One of my friend sees a girl from Tinder and she came with 6 of her friends, we spent the afternoon at the park. I have always been in good shape but I never received as much compliments. Legit had a girl walk up to me to tell me I’m her type, asking if I squat and saying she loves that I also train my legs. Not saying that to brag or whatever, but just to reinforce the fact that life goes on despite PFS and that good things can happen and I have to appreciate every small thing. Was also vibing with a gorgeous blonde, I preferred chasing her than the other girl. I might have made a mistake tho, she applied tanning lotion on my body, is it fine? First time ever using this stuff, it didn’t contain parabens but maybe it’s still not good protocol-wise. My mom used to tell me it was really bad for your health. I hope it fine lol.

    In the same vein, I was wondering if any OG’s had advice regarding having sex for the first time after PFS. I am at this weird spot where I don’t really have ED, and libido wise I guess I would like to have sex 1-2x/week. However the texture of the skin is still a bit weird, I feel the orgasm coming way too fast, and I don’t know if I have enough libido/mental arousal to get non-contact erections in a real-life situation. I frequently read that getting a ‘’practice girl’’ can be beneficial for recovery, so I would be curious to know how to tackle this situation. The 2 girls from this afternoon would be perfect practice girls lol, they are from British Columbia and spending the summer here.

    Tinnitus is the only symptom I am afraid I might never fix, as I read many people keep it. I could live with it if it's the only thing, it got lower for the last 2 months but I'm striving for greatness so I'd like to kill it.
    Looks like you’re coming along good my guy. And right here from Ottawa, Vancouverish girls don’t come here often (at least in my city), so I’m saying go for it. I’m in also in a similar spot, where ED isn’t as big of an issue, but have low libido, that weird rubber texture, and as you said, a weird feeling that develops as you’re about to go, but Ima say go for it as it will also help build confidence, you don’t go from get better season to hide your daughter season overnight. Get your feet in the water - the earlier the better.

    As for the tinnitus, as I told you in chat, prepare for the worst, hope for the best. Try to delve into it, so as to prepare for living with it for the rest of your life, but also doing everything for it to go away. I think it will.

    On a personal note, though, my brother I fucking feel you. I’ve been treating this as some sort of mandatory military time or prison sentence, but we mustn’t do that. If the opportunity presents itself... I say we go for it. Fun. Girls. As long as it’s in or doesn’t mess up something on the protocol.

  4. #64
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    Quote Originally Posted by HOPE View Post
    Looks like you’re coming along good my guy. And right here from Ottawa, Vancouverish girls don’t come here often (at least in my city), so I’m saying go for it. I’m in also in a similar spot, where ED isn’t as big of an issue, but have low libido, that weird rubber texture, and as you said, a weird feeling that develops as you’re about to go, but Ima say go for it as it will also help build confidence, you don’t go from get better season to hide your daughter season overnight. Get your feet in the water - the earlier the better.

    As for the tinnitus, as I told you in chat, prepare for the worst, hope for the best. Try to delve into it, so as to prepare for living with it for the rest of your life, but also doing everything for it to go away. I think it will.

    On a personal note, though, my brother I fucking feel you. I’ve been treating this as some sort of mandatory military time or prison sentence, but we mustn’t do that. If the opportunity presents itself... I say we go for it. Fun. Girls. As long as it’s in or doesn’t mess up something on the protocol.
    Yeah mindset is everything with this condition, that why this forum's vibe is such a lifesaver.

    I guess I'll try to go for it. It's just gonna be weird going into a sexual encounter and not knowing if you're gonna perform/want it. Oh well. Because even though everything ''works'', I have no primal urge to have sex. What a weird life, will keep this thread updated lol.

  5. #65
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    Bad news. I want my log to reflect my journey so letsgo.

    Got overzealous on Monday and rubbed one out , and 2 days later and I still feel like absolute shit; anxiety, anhedonia and suicidal thoughts are back. Can't believe 1 pill wrecked my sexuality, personnality and sanity. Lockdown is being lifted here and it makes me feel even more abnormal. Started a new law internship and I don't give a shit, I focus on my tinnitus allday long. Normally I love starting a new job and meeting people.

    But this downswing is all my fault. From now on, I am going on the ultimate Nofap. 50 years from now, people will be talking about Outlaw's legendary no fap. I am keeping every ounce inside until my balls are tickling my ankles.

    Even if I'm in a big downswing, I am still confident I will recover mentally and sexually. The only doubt killing me is the tinnitu. Turnover said his 1st cycle killed his, I really hope it does the same for me. It got fairly lower for 2 weeks in March but it never completely left. I can always hear it during the day no matter what I do. I also have intermittent cracking ear canal and crunching noises when I move my jaw sideways. I am beyond scared it might never leave.

  6. #66
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    Quote Originally Posted by Outlaw View Post
    Bad news. I want my log to reflect my journey so letsgo.

    Got overzealous on Monday and rubbed one out , and 2 days later and I still feel like absolute shit; anxiety, anhedonia and suicidal thoughts are back. Can't believe 1 pill wrecked my sexuality, personnality and sanity. Lockdown is being lifted here and it makes me feel even more abnormal. Started a new law internship and I don't give a shit, I focus on my tinnitus allday long. Normally I love starting a new job and meeting people.

    But this downswing is all my fault. From now on, I am going on the ultimate Nofap. 50 years from now, people will be talking about Outlaw's legendary no fap. I am keeping every ounce inside until my balls are tickling my ankles.

    Even if I'm in a big downswing, I am still confident I will recover mentally and sexually. The only doubt killing me is the tinnitu. Turnover said his 1st cycle killed his, I really hope it does the same for me. It got fairly lower for 2 weeks in March but it never completely left. I can always hear it during the day no matter what I do. I also have intermittent cracking ear canal and crunching noises when I move my jaw sideways. I am beyond scared it might never leave.
    It's the "downswing doubt" talking to you. I think I just coined a new phrase......anyway, when you're in this type of mindset, everything sucks and it feels like the end of the world.

    All I can add is this.....you're worrying about something that may or may not happen. Ask yourself, does this worrying serve any purpose? Is it going to help me in any way? NO. Let it go. Will the tinnitus go away? Maybe, maybe not, but I can tell you if that is the only thing that you're dealing with concerning pfs, you're LUCKY.

    I'm telling you now, this is how it's gonna be in your head for the whole ride. So you have to get used to dismissing unhealthy thoughts. Otherwise they get a foothold in and grow. You gotta nip that shit in the bud.

    Not that it's a contest, but as far as pfs goes, you didn't get that destroyed, so for that, you should have gratitude. Dealing with some noise in your ears is like taking a walk on a nice sunny day compared to what could have happened to you.

    BE THANKFUL. Live in gratitude. Study mindset and how it effects EVERYTHING.

    Regardless, use this log to write whatever you want. It helps to get it out. And it will help others coming in behind you because when they read your thread and subsequent recovery, it will give them the push they need to keep going.

    Breathe man, breathe.
    Total Male Optimization "People who say it can't be done shouldn't interrupt those that are doing it"

  7. #67
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cdsnuts View Post
    It's the "downswing doubt" talking to you. I think I just coined a new phrase......anyway, when you're in this type of mindset, everything sucks and it feels like the end of the world.

    All I can add is this.....you're worrying about something that may or may not happen. Ask yourself, does this worrying serve any purpose? Is it going to help me in any way? NO. Let it go. Will the tinnitus go away? Maybe, maybe not, but I can tell you if that is the only thing that you're dealing with concerning pfs, you're LUCKY.

    I'm telling you now, this is how it's gonna be in your head for the whole ride. So you have to get used to dismissing unhealthy thoughts. Otherwise they get a foothold in and grow. You gotta nip that shit in the bud.

    Not that it's a contest, but as far as pfs goes, you didn't get that destroyed, so for that, you should have gratitude. Dealing with some noise in your ears is like taking a walk on a nice sunny day compared to what could have happened to you.

    BE THANKFUL. Live in gratitude. Study mindset and how it effects EVERYTHING.

    Regardless, use this log to write whatever you want. It helps to get it out. And it will help others coming in behind you because when they read your thread and subsequent recovery, it will give them the push they need to keep going.

    Breathe man, breathe.
    Hey thanks for taking the time.

    Downswing doubt is the perfect term. When I feel good and I look back at my downswings, I can't understand how skewed my mindset was.

    I just have a hard time with the tinnitus because it's potentially permanent, and I associate that adjective with a lot of anxiety. However, I think if I were 100%, I wouldn't really care about the T. What kills me is the combination of PFS + Tinnitus + too much time to think.

    I totally agree some have it worse. However I still feel unlucky in some way, as I got hit with sexual/mental sides and tinnitus from a single 1mg pill.

    But you're right, I gotta march forward. As my brother tells me, there's a recovery date somewhere on the calendar, and I have to do everything in my power to avoid having it pushed back.

    Going to my bloodtest tomorrow, will order some Alpha Four if my E is still low.

    Thanks for the encouraging words. I will buckle up for the ride and report when things improve.

  8. #68
    Moderator Feedback Score 0 Cdsnuts's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Outlaw View Post
    Hey thanks for taking the time.

    Downswing doubt is the perfect term. When I feel good and I look back at my downswings, I can't understand how skewed my mindset was.

    I just have a hard time with the tinnitus because it's potentially permanent, and I associate that adjective with a lot of anxiety. However, I think if I were 100%, I wouldn't really care about the T. What kills me is the combination of PFS + Tinnitus + too much time to think.

    I totally agree some have it worse. However I still feel unlucky in some way, as I got hit with sexual/mental sides and tinnitus from a single 1mg pill.

    But you're right, I gotta march forward. As my brother tells me, there's a recovery date somewhere on the calendar, and I have to do everything in my power to avoid having it pushed back.

    Going to my bloodtest tomorrow, will order some Alpha Four if my E is still low.

    Thanks for the encouraging words. I will buckle up for the ride and report when things improve.
    Your brother sounds wise....and he's right.

    It is crazy how it can disrupt our reality. But just knowing this, is the key. That, and doing the right things consistently.
    Total Male Optimization "People who say it can't be done shouldn't interrupt those that are doing it"

  9. #69
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    Got my bloodtest prescription, I will take the test this week and order the right prohormone depending on my E level (Ultrahard if high, AlphaFour if low). However I wanna do things right and I have a few questions.

    I started my juicefeast on March 2nd, so July 2nd will mark 4 months on the protocol, which should be good. However, there are certain variables that make me doubt whether I can consider this an adequate 4 months:
    - my juicefeast was only 5 days (couldnt
    afford more)
    - I ran out of Pine Pollen in April, causing a
    small crash
    - I masturbated 7 times since starting,
    occasionnaly causing mini crashes

    Given all of this, would you guys still recommend to start a cycle on July 2nd? Aside from that I'm golden. Might seem stupid but I just wanna make sure everything is good to go before I take the plunge with the prohormones.

  10. #70
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    Hey while I wait for an answer I figured I'd give an encouraging update.

    I feel depressed that 1 pill completely fucked me. I feel depressed that lockdown is lifted and regular life resumes. I feel depressed that my libido is low, my dick is rubbery and that I may keep tinnitus forever.

    But I'm gonna beat this crap. I'm still a student, I have all the time in the world to do the protocol, I have enough money to buy supplements and food, I have all my friends encouraging me, and I have the will to never stop this protocol until I'm perfect. If others recovered I sure can.

    The legendary nofap is still going strong

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