If anyone can relate.. I’m just bored at work & gonna use this thread on some therapeutic shit.

CD is correct in that PFS is isolating. But, I don’t really have a hard time making the transition, although i do well in social situations, I just like being alone more. Just me.

But when explaining my situation to some friends even family members, the vibe I get is “this motherfucker completely lost his mind”.. you then explain to them the mechanism of the drug blocking DHT & how it affects everything for a small group of men ; as well as your steps to recovery & still they think your symptoms are not real & your a nut case.. they may not directly say it, but you know. You just feel it.

I moved out my moms to live with my dad cause of this. We kept arguing, she kept setting up doctors appointments that would not help. Even at the doctor, she did not even let me speak my peace.. like I’m so on the deep end I should not even be allowed tontalk.. She even set up cognitive therapy appointments. When I went to see the psychologist in the waiting room, I looked around at people who were just fucked up, & I felt so ashamed to be a part of these people (no disrespect, you know what I mean) & felt even worse that this is how people are viewing me.. like I’m one of these people...She was giving me shit for fasting everyday non stop.. stressing me the hell out. Even eating in front of me & going “mmmmmm” .. this is at a time where estrogen is going bananas so the little annoying things that your parents do that’s not a big deal would set me OFF to the point that I was tearing. the change of mood was wild.. that’s when I knew I had to get away from mom & all stressors..

I will use the therapy sessions though cause therapy is useful for everyone healthy or not, but her doing that shows that she thinks this whole PFS thing is BS, I’m just reading through the lines here.. I’m not going cause of her, it’s for ME.

Me blindingly jumping into fasting unsupervised just made their belief about me belonging in a psych ward stronger, since they are ignorant on the benefits of fasting. ESPECIALLY in a Hispanic home where there is ALWAYS food everywhere you turn, they get offended when you don’t eat..through their eyes they are seeing a kid who use to eat to the point of force feeding now not eat at all. This is when they really thought I was insane.. my grandmother getting all voodoo religious on me. Praying cause she thought i was turning schizophrenic or something...ESPECIALLY in a Hispanic home where there is ALWAYS food everywhere you turn, they get offended when you don’t eat..

My whole gripe is, when I come out of this, it’s gonna be really different with these people. I think I may have to find entirely new set of friends,only ONE of my buddies who is in the military acknowledges it.. I feel like cutting everyone the fuck off cause you really see who is in your corner during these times.. I know I will be better than pre PFS on all facets, & these people don’t deserve me when I’m great.. Seeing how they view me & not only be ignorant to my situation, but completely refuse to acknowledge it & chalk it up as Ricky has mental illness makes me want to cut them off when I’m at my best, cause at my best they WILL switch up & think it’s all good again. & “hey Ricky’s Back now, he has his brain back!” They will be in for a surprise..Nope, go that way, I’m still crazy right?? Keep it that way.. why would I lie about this? Did I show ANY sign of mental illness prior? It was clearly the drug, fucking idiots. & I have no attachment to anything but improving myself, Recovering from PFS really puts you in that zone where nothing matters... you lose your entire masculinity, your dick, your balls, your peace of mind, sanity etc.. what’s cutting off people gonna really do to you?

Even while recovering folks at my job seeing me switch up to eating eggs, meat, variety of veggies, olive oil on everything, yogurt/fruit & they even comment making jokes on how I eat. It’s hilarious & I crack back at them & tell em “yeah keep eating that greasy shit & tells me about how your gonna one day lose weight but never do etc”.. it’s jokes, but every good joke has truth in it, & I Read between the lines... EVERY time someone makes an effort to improve themselves & they go ALL IN on it, people judge them on it , almost like it makes them feel inferior cause they don’t have that discipline themselves, even if they tried..I’ve been noticing.

My father is the only guy in my family who in some way gets it.. even though I still think he does not understand the whole protocol & my condition, he supports me fully on the protocol everyday with juicing.. sometimes he’ll help out cooking.. although he may think I’m crazy like everyone else, he’s Helping & listens to what I have to say & sees that doing all this puts me at a better place day by day slowly. for that I’m grateful.. VERY grateful, that’s all I ask..

This is what fuels me almost as much as getting my health back.. may not be the best type of energy but along with getting my vitality back it’s a good motivator..

& nothing recently happened, this is just stuff that I notice in this journey very subtly . I’m in a decent mood.. I’m feeling how much mentally stronger I’m getting with this whole thing. The isolation is where the magic happens people, embrace it.. I’m alone enjoying sunsets, enjoying Central Park. Walking around with no shirt getting sun all day, lifting, sprinting. In a crazy way I enjoyed time with my buddies, but they DID hold me back in some way from productivity.. the ISOLATION & uncomfort in isolation is where the growth happens!

Maybe this whole mindset I have about cutting everyone off will change. Forgiving everyone after all this will probably be just as hard as bouncing back from PFS.. I’m trying to see it from their eyes too. I get that it’s something only WE get..


People share your experiences on this topic about how friends and family react to your situation. I’m sure it will help others too.. & I’m sure it’s one of the difficult parts for people to go through, especially those who aren’t as introverted as me