Quote Originally Posted by Turnover25 View Post
Why do you regret it so much? Has it had a chance to work yet? It might work out in your favor
Part of it is that I’m a naturally high-anxiety person. I should have cancelled it the same reasons that I initially cancelled it back in March 2021; I never tried doing short haircut alternatives because I had never done that in my life and it seemed too unlike me. I was always afraid of not looking like myself anymore and I think that was what led me to take fin back in 2009, and what led me to get a hair transplant in 2021. So I feel like I haven’t grown as a person and that I’ve just made things more difficult for myself with this transplant.

I should’ve tried doing progressively shorter buzz cuts to get used to it, there was no need to rush into the transplant like I did.

The transplant could still work in my favor at least for awhile, but I’m now realizing that the amount of grafts that were put in won’t be enough, long-term. And I don’t really know how I’d feel about getting a second surgery, both financially, and cosmetically. There’s not going to be enough grafts to cover the bald spot in the back - ever. I thought that that wouldn’t bother me, and I still don’t feel self-conscious about it, but still. He did tell me going into it that I’d end up needing a second surgery, but for some reason I still pushed ahead. I underestimated the emotional toll this would take on me, all the stress and regret it would cause me.

Longer-term, especially if I need to do more prohormones, it’s going to look too thin in the front/middle, and the “shave your head” option will now be flawed because I'll have a surgical scar from ear to ear. I won’t know how it will look until it fully grows in, but as my remaining native hair goes, I’m not going to be able to do my normal hairstyle with just this transplant.

However, there is some promising news. According to a NY Times article from April 2021 (wish I’d read this when it was new,) there’s an FDA-approved drug that has worked on mice and pigs that removed scars without a trace. They’re expecting to start human trials later this year and if the early results come back showing that it works, some doctors will start doing it off-label in 2022. They’d cut out the scar, suture it closed, and inject this medication. If it works in humans, and we should hopefully find out in 2022, then that would be an option to allow me to shave my head or do any length buzz with no scar. This is kind of the holy grail option that I’m hoping for. Some people hope it’ll let them cut out, transplant, and regrow infinite hair but I don’t want to spend infinite money and have a million surgeries.

Another possibility is getting scalp micropigmentation dots over the scar so it blends in with a very short buzz (#0). If you do that, then you can’t shave it down bare skin or you’d have this strip of dots. Other people have the dots all over their scalp and the pictures I’ve seen seem realistic, but I would rather just be able to shave it completely or just have a #0.

I just can’t afford, mentally, to be worrying about this as I need to focus on my business. I just feel tremendous worry.

Also, I threw away the klonopin - it affects GABA receptors so it should have the same negative effects on PFS as alcohol does. I’m sure that that’s part of why in my PFS state, I felt even worse and had a massive downswing. But I feel so much suspense worrying about whether that new drug will work in humans - if so, then I should be in the clear. I will feel so relieved if I’ll have the option for a full head shave or a short buzz, with no scar… The suspense is killing me.