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    SwoleSource Member Feedback Score 0 alphacfi's Avatar
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    The climb out of hell!

    Wanted to share my story instead of just eaves dropping on everyone else's

    I took finasteride 1.25 for only 4 days. The last day being December 30 2018. That night I woke up to a panic attack in the middle of the night which I had never had before and immediately stopped taking the pill and flushed them. The next day was new years eve and I was extremely depressed all day. So i googled "does finasteride cause depression" and the horrors of reality hit me like a freight train. I saw that I was one of the small percentage of people that could have this reaction. I hoped and prayed that I would get better in the next couple of weeks but my symptoms only got worse and worse. On Christmas day I thought I had everything in the world to live for and then a week later I sincerely thought about jumping off my balcony numerous times. I could barely sleep, had panic attacks, head and neck pains all over, sever anhedonia, felt hot and cold, major depression, shaking hands, and then the double vision. This is very bad for my particular line of work. My sexual side effects were watery seamen and numbness but this actually did go away after a couple of weeks. SO I'm left with all the mental crap.

    Around this time I discovered the totalmaleoptimization protocol and jumped on it the next week starting with a juice cleanse. I only went 4 days. I hate even putting that down here I wish I had gone a full 7. But I was already a healthy eater so I told myself I didn't need to cleanse for longer. Coming off of that I jumped in with the herbs. 7 day cycle. Taking the vitamins and supplements every day, Paleo diet.. etc. I have always been in the gym and so this part of the protocol has been the easiest and also my favorite. I was always in good shape and now I am in fantastic shape. I started feeling a lot better around the second half of March. I had no more panic attacks and even had some days that were basically perfect. Then a couple weeks later I would have days that were perfect and even the bad days were only half bad. I could and can sleep through the night a solid 8-9 hours no problem. And my eyes are perfect now accept for floaters

    I was feeling so good I came off the herbs for a week and felt pretty great. I did another 3 day juice cleanse. Symptoms came back kinda hard after that. But then went down again. I was finally feeling like I could go hang out with friends again and be somewhat comfortable with that. This past weekend I had a girl over and I drank for the first time since January. Wow this was a bad idea. I had a panic attack the next day and the anhedonia is back. I should have waited much further for that one. I read that at 80-90% recovered alcohol might be ok but I guess I am not at that point yet.

    I ordered 4 more herbs so Ill be on an 11 day cycle now. Take all the proper vitamins every day including chlorella and spirulina. Also calcium and magnesium. Paleo diet. I take L-theanine, bacopa, and lions mane every day. Do the breathing exercises and some meditation every day. Ice showers morning and night.

    Everyday I wake up I have no idea what kind of day I might have. I have had days that are absolutely symptom free! This is the weirdest part. How can I go from being completely fine back to being a shadow of myself, just like that????????? And it seems completely out of my control. Overall, undoubtedly, my downs are not as bad as they used to be. I just got the R andro pills in today as well. I'm shelving those for a later day. Hope I am doing the right things here and my recovery is coming soon. Thank God for you guys that have posted on here and CD for creating the site. I have no idea where I would be right now on my own.
    Last edited by alphacfi; 04-23-2019 at 09:14 PM.

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