Dknighten's Road To Recovery

[Turnover25]

Thanks for the response man. I have yet to do the full protocol. I'm starting it with a fast, as long as I can go. I've been saying it for a while but it has taken this long to get a medical leave approved and get the fuck out of this graduate program.

And I'm only asking because I have seen very few that have the fluid retention and total skin changes I'm talking about. It's like Finasteride triggered Ehlers Danlos disease and broke my lymphatic system. If you've seen a ton of guys with similar symptoms, I must have missed them.

What is so bad about the graduate program if you don't mind me asking? I had issues with school such as bad anxiety while studying, and kinda like an information overload where I got panic attacks while trying to remember stuff. Sound kinda similar?

The fluid retention I've seen Jacknap talk about how he walked around with a moonface from water retention, I also had water retention and it comes and goes. Maxout and CD and some other guys said the same stuff about skin where they couldn't feel it or it was soft and rubbery I think, someone said something about having imprints in their legs after getting out of chairs, but I don't remember where I saw that.

Bottom line is I really don't think you're a special case man, if you could trade places with me you'd see how fucked I am/was too, especially mentally. I just don't really play it up on the forum because this is a place of positivity. I think your symptoms will go away once you get to work. I don't think your lymphatic system is broken man, just like I don't think I have brain damage. This month out of nowhere my memory started flickering on and off randomly. I did my fast almost 8 months ago and started the herbs in January.

[DKnighten]

What is so bad about the graduate program if you don't mind me asking? I had issues with school such as bad anxiety while studying, and kinda like an information overload where I got panic attacks while trying to remember stuff. Sound kinda similar?

The fluid retention I've seen Jacknap talk about how he walked around with a moonface from water retention, I also had water retention and it comes and goes. Maxout and CD and some other guys said the same stuff about skin where they couldn't feel it or it was soft and rubbery I think, someone said something about having imprints in their legs after getting out of chairs, but I don't remember where I saw that.

Bottom line is I really don't think you're a special case man, if you could trade places with me you'd see how fucked I am/was too, especially mentally. I just don't really play it up on the forum because this is a place of positivity. I think your symptoms will go away once you get to work. I don't think your lymphatic system is broken man, just like I don't think I have brain damage. This month out of nowhere my memory started flickering on and off randomly. I did my fast almost 8 months ago and started the herbs in January.

The anxiety and cognitive issues certainly make it hard, CD describes it as thinking through a blanket and that's pretty accurate. It's like looking out through a dull window constantly. But what makes it unbearable is not being able to feel my muscles and my body swelling. Sitting in a chair or standing is like being supported by rubber. All I feel is the contact of my joints with the ground. Like my muscles are not even online. Even my feet and hands are puffy & my skin is thin as shit everywhere. I'm not doubting your symptoms or trying to say that I need some kind of extra attention or whatever. I have just always been in tremendous shape my whole life and now a simple walk around the block is like walking in an obese dead body. In my previous post I said I wouldn't update until after the fast was underway or completed and I should've stuck to that. The veterans have stated that the pathway for recovery is the same for everyone affected by Finasteride and I should just trust that. There's honestly nothing else I can do.

I am very glad to hear that your situation is improving man.

[Cdsnuts]

The veterans have stated that the pathway for recovery is the same for everyone affected by Finasteride and I should just trust that. There's honestly nothing else I can do.

I am very glad to hear that your situation is improving man.

Correct, and correct. The blind faithers are the quickest to recover.....always. And the main reason why? Not just because they are doing what is laid out for them, moreso they are not getting in their own way by thinking they can change this or tweak that, etc.

Just do it man. The sooner, the better.

[DKnighten]

I'm ordering my herb rotation and I noticed that the Rhodiola link is down and I'm not able to find it on the LEH website. Can anyone recommend a quality Rhodiola supplement? Thanks in advance.

[DKnighten]

@Cdsnuts
CD, I had some questions i've been wanting to ask you & anybody else willing to chime in about general symptoms with PFS. I got fucked hard by a single pill I took over 2 and a half years ago and it led to basically everything about my body changing. Chatted with you in the WhatsApp group and you recommended for me to post my questions here:

Did your actual skin texture and complexion change when you got PFS?
Within days of taking that first pill, I felt something shut off inside of my body. All of my muscles were instantly weak, foreign, and shaky. All of my skin gradually got very rubbery, elastic, thin, etc. Just like an old guy. It is like I lost the texture of my skin and my body got very soft. Prior to PFS, I was always very muscular, dense, lean, and vascular. All of my veins disappeared, I lost all of my muscles, the muscles got very soft, and my skin aged. This hasn't improved. I also started gaining weird, numb fat on my thighs and around my stomach, my hands got puffy, and basically all of my body is like something shut off. I can take and pull my skin anywhere on my body and it's stretchy, pale, does not tan, and has very little sensation anywhere.

During your recovery, was there a major turning point where you went from seeing zero improvement for an extended period of time to beginning to notice improvement in your symptoms?
I've seen you describe your first water fast as a "hail mary". Was this because you tried the waiting game, took medicines, supplements, etc. without seeing improvement? How long was it after you stopped taking Finasteride did you start thinking that just time wasn't going to heal you? Were the first improvements you ever experienced during your fast? and what were they?

The Crash
I never experienced a "crash" like many guys do who get PFS. I took a single pill and by the next morning it was like my brain was completely empty. My vision was so screwed that it looked like staring through a fishbowl, it was like being inside of a dream. I couldn't feel my body or anything. This just got worse as more time went by, I noticed my hair was getting more dry, my skin was starting to stop producing oil and start having this scaly, pale texture, and I just gradually kept losing muscle and my body was becoming more foreign. I couldn't understand what I was reading or looking at, my body odor started to smell like cat piss, etc. That was 2 and a half years ago. Now it feels like I've lost so many things that I probably can't ever get back. It just seems like many guys have this initial crash when they take the drug or come off the drug where things go to shit all at once and then gradually improve from there. In my case, it took like over a year and a half for me to even reach a baseline of PFS, it that makes sense. What are your thoughts on this?


Diet-wise, what were your personal go-to's for meal preparations and snacks?
I posted a thread about general food tips and I've taken note of most of the recipes posted here (like the goat kefir w/ collagen & berries, soup, etc), but I wanted to ask during your journey with PFS, were there certain recipes and combinations that you went to pretty often, did you keep it simple? Asking because i've just been kind of running low on ideas lately.

Thanks in advance.

[Queens1984]

@Cdsnuts
CD, I had some questions i've been wanting to ask you & anybody else willing to chime in about general symptoms with PFS. I got fucked hard by a single pill I took over 2 and a half years ago and it led to basically everything about my body changing. Chatted with you in the WhatsApp group and you recommended for me to post my questions here:

Did your actual skin texture and complexion change when you got PFS?
Within days of taking that first pill, I felt something shut off inside of my body. All of my muscles were instantly weak, foreign, and shaky. All of my skin gradually got very rubbery, elastic, thin, etc. Just like an old guy. It is like I lost the texture of my skin and my body got very soft. Prior to PFS, I was always very muscular, dense, lean, and vascular. All of my veins disappeared, I lost all of my muscles, the muscles got very soft, and my skin aged. This hasn't improved. I also started gaining weird, numb fat on my thighs and around my stomach, my hands got puffy, and basically all of my body is like something shut off. I can take and pull my skin anywhere on my body and it's stretchy, pale, does not tan, and has very little sensation anywhere.

During your recovery, was there a major turning point where you went from seeing zero improvement for an extended period of time to beginning to notice improvement in your symptoms?
I've seen you describe your first water fast as a "hail mary". Was this because you tried the waiting game, took medicines, supplements, etc. without seeing improvement? How long was it after you stopped taking Finasteride did you start thinking that just time wasn't going to heal you? Were the first improvements you ever experienced during your fast? and what were they?

The Crash
I never experienced a "crash" like many guys do who get PFS. I took a single pill and by the next morning it was like my brain was completely empty. My vision was so screwed that it looked like staring through a fishbowl, it was like being inside of a dream. I couldn't feel my body or anything. This just got worse as more time went by, I noticed my hair was getting more dry, my skin was starting to stop producing oil and start having this scaly, pale texture, and I just gradually kept losing muscle and my body was becoming more foreign. I couldn't understand what I was reading or looking at, my body odor started to smell like cat piss, etc. That was 2 and a half years ago. Now it feels like I've lost so many things that I probably can't ever get back. It just seems like many guys have this initial crash when they take the drug or come off the drug where things go to shit all at once and then gradually improve from there. In my case, it took like over a year and a half for me to even reach a baseline of PFS, it that makes sense. What are your thoughts on this?


Diet-wise, what were your personal go-to's for meal preparations and snacks?
I posted a thread about general food tips and I've taken note of most of the recipes posted here (like the goat kefir w/ collagen & berries, soup, etc), but I wanted to ask during your journey with PFS, were there certain recipes and combinations that you went to pretty often, did you keep it simple? Asking because i've just been kind of running low on ideas lately.

Thanks in advance.

I remember my crash 2012. I woke up and had no Emotion. Told my friend he thought I was CRAZY. All
Your symptoms I have had and more. Your not alone brother

[Turnover25]

@Cdsnuts
CD, I had some questions i've been wanting to ask you & anybody else willing to chime in about general symptoms with PFS. I got fucked hard by a single pill I took over 2 and a half years ago and it led to basically everything about my body changing. Chatted with you in the WhatsApp group and you recommended for me to post my questions here:

Did your actual skin texture and complexion change when you got PFS?
Within days of taking that first pill, I felt something shut off inside of my body. All of my muscles were instantly weak, foreign, and shaky. All of my skin gradually got very rubbery, elastic, thin, etc. Just like an old guy. It is like I lost the texture of my skin and my body got very soft. Prior to PFS, I was always very muscular, dense, lean, and vascular. All of my veins disappeared, I lost all of my muscles, the muscles got very soft, and my skin aged. This hasn't improved. I also started gaining weird, numb fat on my thighs and around my stomach, my hands got puffy, and basically all of my body is like something shut off. I can take and pull my skin anywhere on my body and it's stretchy, pale, does not tan, and has very little sensation anywhere.

During your recovery, was there a major turning point where you went from seeing zero improvement for an extended period of time to beginning to notice improvement in your symptoms?
I've seen you describe your first water fast as a "hail mary". Was this because you tried the waiting game, took medicines, supplements, etc. without seeing improvement? How long was it after you stopped taking Finasteride did you start thinking that just time wasn't going to heal you? Were the first improvements you ever experienced during your fast? and what were they? I also didn’t see improvement during my water/juice fast, I felt a million times worse during and after for a while.

The Crash
I never experienced a "crash" like many guys do who get PFS. I took a single pill and by the next morning it was like my brain was completely empty. My vision was so screwed that it looked like staring through a fishbowl, it was like being inside of a dream. I couldn't feel my body or anything. This just got worse as more time went by, I noticed my hair was getting more dry, my skin was starting to stop producing oil and start having this scaly, pale texture, and I just gradually kept losing muscle and my body was becoming more foreign. I couldn't understand what I was reading or looking at, my body odor started to smell like cat piss, etc. That was 2 and a half years ago. Now it feels like I've lost so many things that I probably can't ever get back. It just seems like many guys have this initial crash when they take the drug or come off the drug where things go to shit all at once and then gradually improve from there. In my case, it took like over a year and a half for me to even reach a baseline of PFS, it that makes sense. What are your thoughts on this?


Diet-wise, what were your personal go-to's for meal preparations and snacks?
I posted a thread about general food tips and I've taken note of most of the recipes posted here (like the goat kefir w/ collagen & berries, soup, etc), but I wanted to ask during your journey with PFS, were there certain recipes and combinations that you went to pretty often, did you keep it simple? Asking because i've just been kind of running low on ideas lately.

Thanks in advance.

1. Yes, skin was/is messed up. A lot of changes in skin, muscle, eyes, and veins. But my veins were opposite than yours where all the sudden they all bulged out of my body, especially in my head. Also varicose veins. I don’t really want to go into specifics because that isn’t what this forum is about.

2. Yes, it was recent, after suffering nearly 2 years. This shit takes time. I didn’t improve much until my 2nd pro hormone cycle, where I no longer felt like I was 80 years old with dementia, walking through life feeing my way around like a blind man. I was neurologically destroyed, it’s improved slow, I’ve been doing the protocol for over a year. I basically did the protocol for all that time, with 0 improvement wondering if I’m fucked forever, then improvement began randomly. I also felt way worse during and after my water fast and juice feast. Kept trucking anyways.

3. I didn’t have 1 crash, I had multiple. I had I my initial one, where I took fin, sat back down to watch tv, then maybe an hour later noticed my vision looked like I was underwater, I had derealization, colors were extremely vivid and I felt like I was in a dream. Then came the massive panick attack that sealed my fate because some idiot from propeciahelp wrote a legit article about how fin destroyed his life and how he sees the world through a “thick fog”, I truly believe that article helped in my demise by putting my body through an obscene amount of stress, could have probably saved myself a lot of derealization and trouble without people like that. But then I had smaller crashes in the months following, I’d get “the flu” randomly then after it was gone I’d have more symptoms that just started. They’re all documented in my thread. My crash lasted a long time. If I hadn’t started the protocol, I would have been slowly deteriorating.

I eat veggies (squash, asparagus, avocado, onion, garlic, spinach), nuts (pistachios), meat (ground turkey, chicken breast, eggs), fruit (apples, bananas, grapes, blue/strawberries, raspberries, kiwi, pears), high quality olive oil and that’s it. Sometimes cheat meals if I go out somewhere, like nachos. My backloads, or when I eat carbs are dates and potatoes only. Usually for meals I’ll just cook some chicken or turkey and sauté the vegetables along with it in a frying pan. Easy. Hard boiled eggs are easy too. I also drink this tea I make while boiling lemon, cinnamon and ginger root to fight inflammation. I work full time, so my daily routine is wake up for work, cold shower, work, gym, then cook dinner and cook lunch for the next day at work. I eat the same stuff everyday and don’t ever get cravings, because Med-jool dates are basically candy and have so much natural sugar that they destroy any artificial sugar craving I get. I never want ice cream candy or any of it.

But it sounds like you’re just looking for reassurance man, which you shouldn’t be. That’s an endless cycle and your mind is tricking you. Reading your story or how you describe things it doesn’t seem all too crazy to me after everything I’ve been through. I promise, there are guys here who are just as bad as you, just do the things that you’ve seen done time and time again to heal, and you will. I don’t say this to be a dick, but usually when you post, you say something like “I took 1 pill X amount of time ago, and my whole body shut down blah blah” but the X amount of time keeps increasing, and it won’t stop increasing until you really buckle down and do what you need to. I’m not saying you’re not doing that, I would just say the same to anyone. I’ve never been too concerned with people’s symptoms, crashes, any of it, that’s why I’m here on this forum and once I’m healed I’ll probably be done with all of it. You can heal, no more symptom comparing just go out and kick this things ass. I say this because I care about you and the pfs community, and if I’ve improved anyone can.

[Cdsnuts]

@Cdsnuts
CD, I had some questions i've been wanting to ask you & anybody else willing to chime in about general symptoms with PFS. I got fucked hard by a single pill I took over 2 and a half years ago and it led to basically everything about my body changing. Chatted with you in the WhatsApp group and you recommended for me to post my questions here:

Did your actual skin texture and complexion change when you got PFS?
Within days of taking that first pill, I felt something shut off inside of my body. All of my muscles were instantly weak, foreign, and shaky. All of my skin gradually got very rubbery, elastic, thin, etc. Just like an old guy. It is like I lost the texture of my skin and my body got very soft. Prior to PFS, I was always very muscular, dense, lean, and vascular. All of my veins disappeared, I lost all of my muscles, the muscles got very soft, and my skin aged. This hasn't improved. I also started gaining weird, numb fat on my thighs and around my stomach, my hands got puffy, and basically all of my body is like something shut off. I can take and pull my skin anywhere on my body and it's stretchy, pale, does not tan, and has very little sensation anywhere.

Yup. A switch went off inside my brain and I felt it for sure. Could just feel I wasn't right. Skin issues also.

During your recovery, was there a major turning point where you went from seeing zero improvement for an extended period of time to beginning to notice improvement in your symptoms?
I've seen you describe your first water fast as a "hail mary". Was this because you tried the waiting game, took medicines, supplements, etc. without seeing improvement? How long was it after you stopped taking Finasteride did you start thinking that just time wasn't going to heal you? Were the first improvements you ever experienced during your fast? and what were they?

Yes in regards to the fast. This is all documented on PH. All of this. You have to remember...you're asking questions that I've answered many, many times before, not too mention I've been recovered for almost ten years already to it's almost impossible to remember every single little thing.

The Crash
I never experienced a "crash" like many guys do who get PFS. I took a single pill and by the next morning it was like my brain was completely empty. My vision was so screwed that it looked like staring through a fishbowl, it was like being inside of a dream. I couldn't feel my body or anything. This just got worse as more time went by, I noticed my hair was getting more dry, my skin was starting to stop producing oil and start having this scaly, pale texture, and I just gradually kept losing muscle and my body was becoming more foreign. I couldn't understand what I was reading or looking at, my body odor started to smell like cat piss, etc. That was 2 and a half years ago. Now it feels like I've lost so many things that I probably can't ever get back. It just seems like many guys have this initial crash when they take the drug or come off the drug where things go to shit all at once and then gradually improve from there. In my case, it took like over a year and a half for me to even reach a baseline of PFS, it that makes sense. What are your thoughts on this?

I never had an initial crash. Just a slow gradual decline into madness.


Diet-wise, what were your personal go-to's for meal preparations and snacks?
I posted a thread about general food tips and I've taken note of most of the recipes posted here (like the goat kefir w/ collagen & berries, soup, etc), but I wanted to ask during your journey with PFS, were there certain recipes and combinations that you went to pretty often, did you keep it simple? Asking because i've just been kind of running low on ideas lately.

Thanks in advance.

I ate simply. Anything and everything on the Paleo list.

I know you're trying to compare where you're at to see how you stack up recovery wise with others. You can't do that. It will come when it comes. Everyone's journey is different. The only thing that remains the same is what you have to do to get yourself back. Comparing yourself to others is just going to cause unnecessary anxiety.

[Cdsnuts]

1. Yes, skin was/is messed up. A lot of changes in skin, muscle, eyes, and veins. But my veins were opposite than yours where all the sudden they all bulged out of my body, especially in my head. Also varicose veins. I don’t really want to go into specifics because that isn’t what this forum is about.

2. Yes, it was recent, after suffering nearly 2 years. This shit takes time. I didn’t improve much until my 2nd pro hormone cycle, where I no longer felt like I was 80 years old with dementia, walking through life feeing my way around like a blind man. I was neurologically destroyed, it’s improved slow, I’ve been doing the protocol for over a year. I basically did the protocol for all that time, with 0 improvement wondering if I’m fucked forever, then improvement began randomly. I also felt way worse during and after my water fast and juice feast. Kept trucking anyways.

3. I didn’t have 1 crash. I had I my initial one, where I took fin, sat back down to watch tv, then maybe an hour later noticed my vision looked like I was underwater, I had derealization, colors were extremely vivid and I felt like I was in a dream. Then came the massive panick attack that sealed my fate because some idiot from propeciahelp wrote a legit article about how fin destroyed his life and how he sees the world through a “thick fog”, I truly believe that article helped in my demise by putting my body through an obscene amount of stress, could have probably saved myself a lot of derealization and trouble without people like that. But then I had smaller crashes in the months following, I’d get “the flu” randomly then after it was gone I’d have more symptoms that just started. They’re all documented in my thread. My crash lasted a long time. If I hadn’t started the protocol, I would have been slowly deteriorating.

I eat veggies (squash, asparagus, avocado, onion, garlic, spinach), nuts (pistachios), meat (ground turkey, chicken breast, eggs), fruit (apples, bananas, grapes, blue/strawberries, raspberries, kiwi, pears), high quality olive oil and that’s it. Sometimes cheat meals if I go out somewhere, like nachos. My backloads, or when I eat carbs are dates and potatoes only. Usually for meals I’ll just cook some chicken or turkey and sauté the vegetables along with it in a frying pan. Easy. Hard boiled eggs are easy too. I also drink this tea I make while boiling lemon, cinnamon and ginger root to fight inflammation.

But it sounds like you’re just looking for reassurance man, which you shouldn’t be. That’s an endless cycle and your mind is tricking you. Reading your story or how you describe things it doesn’t seem all too crazy to me after everything I’ve been through. I promise, there are guys here who are just as bad as you, just do the things that you’ve seen done time and time again to heal, and you will. I don’t say this to be a dick, but usually when you post, you say something like “I took 1 pill X amount of time ago, and my whole body shut down blah blah” but the X amount of time keeps increasing, and it won’t stop increasing until you really buckle down and do what you need to. I’m not saying you’re not doing that, I would just say the same to anyone. I’ve never been too concerned with people’s symptoms, crashes, any of it, that’s why I’m here on this forum and once I’m healed I’ll probably be done with all of it. You can heal, no more symptom comparing just go out and kick this things ass. I say this because I care about you and the pfs community, and if I’ve improved anyone can.

Good post. I posted something similar before reading what you had written.

[Turnover25]

Good post. I posted something similar before reading what you had written.

Thanks bro.