7 months! it's been a fkcin while!!!

Hope you are doing good friends, I mean, everyday closer to recovery. This forum is quite quiet now days. Maybe one of the reasons is that you all are doing graeat and moving on with your lifes!!!
I'm here again just for the record.

When I first started my journey, back in february 2020, my main motivation was FEAR, I was fckin scared of loosing my manhood, and all that comes behind it. So I jumped on TMO with body and soul, and stayed like that for at least 6 months. By July 2020 I had vanished all my mental sides and was sexually functioning once again, not like pre PFS but I Was there. The more confiedence you gain, the more courage you have to induge some cheating here and there (me, at least). And there I was, Passed from July 2020 to July 2021 doing some minor cheating, still avoiding gluten, but going closer to my old lifestyle, I kept herbs and lifting nonstopping.

Slowly progressing with gains that we obviously cannot see from one day to another, only in months timeframe. By September, and after a couple of PH cycles I kinda was feeling my old self, with NO diference at all, mean it, good sex drive, rocking moring woods, ramdom boners, boners from tought that could stand for 5 minutes, all that kind of stuff we once were used to. lived September and October like that. I even got away from here, mean it, i love you boys don't get me wrong, but once you are feeling on the other side, 90% of what we discuss here is more of the same thing. And it is SO important, im just sayng it has different pertspectives depending from where you are looking at.

10 days ago..BAMMMMMMMM!!! some unexpected downswing happened, making me feel like I lost one year or more of progress.....Where did go that intense life inside my pipe?! I Felt so much difference that for the 1st time I realized how far I was on my recovery. Anyway, this episode (that I'm still living) will pass, fast I hope. And it has teached me somethings...

- we can cheat, but everything has a limit, if you are not fully recovered, PFS might give a Hello.
- no matter how far you are, takes time to get USED to what you once were, and further, to consider yourself recovered.
- no more FEAR as the main motivator, I saw the promissed land, I felt it, It's perfect after going through all of this we experienced.