Quote Originally Posted by HOPE View Post
I’m not sure man. Really losing hope, not on the protocol, but myself. I’ve seen it work for those with PFS (I’m 100% sure that this is the cure), but now with PSSD I’m doubting again. There are already 2 guys I know of that have PSSD and claim they live extremely healthy lives, but don’t have any improvements in their symptoms. I really didn’t want to reopen this stage, seeing as I thought I had it closed, but once again I’m having suicidal ideation. I have a history of from this sort of thing, was battling DP/DR then like a fucking idiot took an antidepressant, and within 10 days I developed PSSD. I couldn’t take the emotional numbness, and I can’t now, nicotine was my crush and even then, I attempted suicide. Was lucky enough to get admitted and survived, but I explained to the psychiatrist what I had was from the pills, and while she was nice enough not to give me more of these damn pills, she thought I was outright crazy. Couldn’t blame her then, and wouldn’t blame her now. I remember reading the day after I stopped the pills, and subsequently finding out this crap, that this sort of reaction is “incredibly rare”. I still developed it. It’s been hell since, and apart from a few moments of distraction, I’m not sure, the only thing I’m sure of is that the guys here should know that the protocol will work for PFS. It’s hormonal, there’s no way that this protocol wouldn’t work. As for me, I really do believe, as defeating and PropeciaHelp this sounds, I really do think I might just be fucked. The other day, one of the guys with my same symptoms, from an antidepressant, commited suicide. Damn shame, considering he had great success from UltraHard. Protocol would’ve probably cured him.

This log, I know has been a little different, but I couldn’t imagine that this is how much the nicotine has been helping. Day 3 of juice feast, gonna give the protocol exactly 2 years.

I’d like everyone pray for me for the strength just to not go fuck it. I’d even do anything to have my damn anxiety back. Really praying I don’t just fucking kill myself. Might have to reintroduce a bit of nicotine, but if it kills my fast I’m saying fuck it. Might as well die. Right?
Can’t believe just how shit my life is. It’s literally so fucking shit I pray I had PFS. At least there’s a cure then. Fuck. Do I smoke now? Do I commit suicide? Am I fucked for over? Who knows.
Day 3. We’ll evaluate somewhere day 710.

Hope exits. Act 4 Scene 2 ends.

I really believe in you bro, I have faith you will get better. I suspect the way your feeling now could be just connected to ceasing nicotine use. Hang in there