Beginning of my recovery story

[Outlaw]

I would not do a 14 day waterfast as my first ever water fast. But thats just me. I'd recommend 7 days to start.

Important stuff would be:
1) only drink water (with a pinch of himalayan salt)
2) don't exercise/coldshowers/stress.. just focus on resting
3) I supplemented with magnesium and potassium, but not everybody does that
4) Break the fast super slow. I did juice for a day, then fruits 1 day, and then steamed veggies and a little chicken

[Thetfordboy]

Thanks. I am finding this all so overewhelming.

[Thetfordboy]

Ok update, I had my 1st erections yesterday and today-not full but mild erect. My 1st bits of libido returned and I was able to masturbate. Had very sore testicles last night in ned and awful anxiety dreams. Testicles are still sore/burning today and their physical feeling have changed- what does this mean?

By the way I am eating junk food the past few days since I realised I messed up the 9 day juice fast. 4 weeks off the propecia tomorrow.

[lastnoirking87]

Buddy, stop the junk food immediately. It is only throwing off your hormonal health even further. From now on, whether you do the water fast, proper juice feast, whatever you do, switch your diet over to whole foods, fruits, veggies, meats, no junk food at all.

My experience with testicular pain is that it is sometimes indicative of them starting to work again actually. Look at it as a good sign, and they to not masturbate much right now.

[Thetfordboy]

Thank you, I don't smoke, drink or do drugs but my problem was always binge and restrict cycles so food was always something I turned to in times of hardship.

I am currently taking time off work due to the stress of this all and staying with my parents back in my native Ireland as my mental health had deteriorated even further the last few days and I was getting pulled at work over bad performance. I am really finding this all very hard to deal with and often get paralysed with fear. I plan to eat normally until next week and then do the 7 day water fast and start again. What threw me off is that I did the 9 day juice fast and put in such effort and then when I realised I'd done it wrong my whole fragile mind snapped.

To me my biggest fear/psychological issue is my ed and loss of libido, my libido has totally gone again and ed has returned firmly and it feels like anti freeze is on my penis and I can't describe how psychologically that affects me. It's like I can't walk or move my arms and it just terrifies me. It just really scares me, I have started getting panic attacks-I never had these before. Even on the plane home last night, I had one and the staff had to move me. I don't understand what is happening.

[lastnoirking87]

Thank you, I don't smoke, drink or do drugs but my problem was always binge and restrict cycles so food was always something I turned to in times of hardship.

I am currently taking time off work due to the stress of this all and staying with my parents back in my native Ireland as my mental health had deteriorated even further the last few days and I was getting pulled at work over bad performance. I am really finding this all very hard to deal with and often get paralysed with fear. I plan to eat normally until next week and then do the 7 day water fast and start again. What threw me off is that I did the 9 day juice fast and put in such effort and then when I realised I'd done it wrong my whole fragile mind snapped.

To me my biggest fear/psychological issue is my ed and loss of libido, my libido has totally gone again and ed has returned firmly and it feels like anti freeze is on my penis and I can't describe how psychologically that affects me. It's like I can't walk or move my arms and it just terrifies me. It just really scares me, I have started getting panic attacks-I never had these before. Even on the plane home last night, I had one and the staff had to move me. I don't understand what is happening.

Well, my friend, you are among similar company here. I dont think theres one user on this forum who didnt experience recurring panic attacks and crippling anxiety at the beginning of their journey.
Go and read through my introductory post in the introduce yourself sticky as well as my recovery log. I was in a nearly identical position as you. I will tell you for sure that when I wrote that introductory post I was a lot more stressed out and scared than it seems just by reading the post.
What you have here in this forum is a priceless accumulation of many peoples' experiences while working through the same situation you find yourself in. You will find we geberally all started out where you are, and most or all of us that have stuck with the healing protocol laid out on totalmaleoptimization.com have made totally dramatic improvements and/or have been healed. If it helps you any, I'm only nearing 3 months on the protocol myself, and Im enjoying life like I havent in years. Aside from sexually, I feel better in every facet of my being than I did prior to getting PFS. Sexually, I am making leaps and bounds towards recovery since beginning the protocol. Prior to that, things felt like they were stuck in the mud, moving at such a slow pace that I'm not even sure I would have gotten to where I am now in 5 years. I regularly have days where I'm 95% normal now. This will eventually stick and I'll be healed. Until then, I'm enjoying the fuck out of life, getting out in the sun, exercising, cleaning and repairing my body and getting it into top shape.
Be careful with the stress, as it throws your hormones further out of whack. As cortisol rises (which it does when stressed), testosterone lowers, and your desired goal of male health is pushed further away from you. You have to forget about the PFS worries, implement the TMO lifestyle changes at whatever pace is comfortable for you financially or physically or mentally, and just focus on the here and now as you slowly but surely bring your body back to, and beyond, your previous state of health and sexual function.

[Malibu]

Well, my friend, you are among similar company here. I dont think theres one user on this forum who didnt experience recurring panic attacks and crippling anxiety at the beginning of their journey.
Go and read through my introductory post in the introduce yourself sticky as well as my recovery log. I was in a nearly identical position as you. I will tell you for sure that when I wrote that introductory post I was a lot more stressed out and scared than it seems just by reading the post.
What you have here in this forum is a priceless accumulation of many peoples' experiences while working through the same situation you find yourself in. You will find we geberally all started out where you are, and most or all of us that have stuck with the healing protocol laid out on totalmaleoptimization.com have made totally dramatic improvements and/or have been healed. If it helps you any, I'm only nearing 3 months on the protocol myself, and Im enjoying life like I havent in years. Aside from sexually, I feel better in every facet of my being than I did prior to getting PFS. Sexually, I am making leaps and bounds towards recovery since beginning the protocol. Prior to that, things felt like they were stuck in the mud, moving at such a slow pace that I'm not even sure I would have gotten to where I am now in 5 years. I regularly have days where I'm 95% normal now. This will eventually stick and I'll be healed. Until then, I'm enjoying the fuck out of life, getting out in the sun, exercising, cleaning and repairing my body and getting it into top shape.
Be careful with the stress, as it throws your hormones further out of whack. As cortisol rises (which it does when stressed), testosterone lowers, and your desired goal of male health is pushed further away from you. You have to forget about the PFS worries, implement the TMO lifestyle changes at whatever pace is comfortable for you financially or physically or mentally, and just focus on the here and now as you slowly but surely bring your body back to, and beyond, your previous state of health and sexual function.

Very encouraging to see you’re doing well. We’re on a similar time frame and though my progress has not been as dramatic, I can second a lot of what you’ve said. Keep it up!

[Malibu]

Hang in there Thetfordboy, you’re going to be fine my man. What you are describing is familiar, perhaps the most vulnerable stage of PFS, where it’s early on and a crazy storm of psychological and physical dysfunction that’s hard to describe. But guess what, like everyone else you’ll get to the other side, you’re in the right place with this forum, and sadly a lot of other pfsers can’t say the same. Your fears are understandable but don’t be fooled into thinking what you fear is permanent.

And also, this might sound crazy, but a bit of anxiety and fear might actually be a good sign. I remember in my early days, I was a complete anhedonic zombie. No emotion at all, if I was to see someone get hit by a car I probably wouldn’t feel anything. It was only after starting on the protocol that a few months later I started getting some anxiety, fear, and anger again, (and thankfully some positive emotions too.)

[lastnoirking87]

Very encouraging to see you’re doing well. We’re on a similar time frame and though my progress has not been as dramatic, I can second a lot of what you’ve said. Keep it up!

Trying to provide some support here, because Thetford is in the same boat I was in about 4 months ago. Once the mental stuff cleared up, it was all mainly sexual issues...and they were bad. If I had one day a month that I functioned sexually at like 80% normal, I was so thankful back then, and now that, and better, is occuring multiple days a week, or sometimes for part of the day...the specific symptoms are still flaky, and not consistent, but the underlying progress is definitely consistent, undeniable, and dramatic. Im figuring I probably still have 6 months-year before I feel totally healed, but the point is that getting on this regimen has allowed me to enjoy life again, and get in the best shape I've ever been in, and if I can do it, Thetford, you can too...anyone can really. I regret not stumbling onto TMO prior to getting PFS actually...

[Thetfordboy]

Thank you, my situation seems to have got worse as my testicles are really hurting this past 48 hours-so bad that I can't sleep. It's really worrying me.