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  1. #1
    SwoleSource Member Feedback Score 0 strato's Avatar
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    Strato's road to recovery

    Hi everyone,

    This is my first post to the forum and introduction to myself and my journey with hair loss, finasteride and healing from PFS.

    *Fair warning, this is a really long post and that's deliberate.* This is going to be more like a complete story of my journey, rather than a simple post. I want to include as much detail as possible so that those experiencing PFS, hair loss or thinking about taking finasteride, can gain insights, inspiration and hope for making it through their own journeys. I also want to make it clear that my key and only intention is to share my authentic experience with finasteride and my recovery journey from PFS for others to see. I am not trying to convince you one way or another in regards to anything and simply don't believe in proselytizing in this way as I will always respect your choice to do with this information whatever you see is best for your life. Again, this is simply my truth and my experience, that's it. So let's begin.

    Brief Thank You To Cdnuts + Positive Members Here

    Firstly, I found out about CDnuts a couple of months ago via Reddit forums and have since been learning all I could on the TMO website + the swolesource forums. I can already say that I have immense gratitude in just finding this self-empowered community for PFS, led by cd. I absolutely fundamentally believe that our bodies have the capacity and intelligence to self-heal (of course with the right habits and practices supporting this process), and as soon as I found out about cd, TMO and this forum, I could immediately pick up on the fundamental energy of positivity, inner strength and self-belief needed to overcome the challenges we face in life. Countless times, I have seen how key the power of attitude is when it comes to the positive transformations we wish to create in our life, and that inner absolute knowing that I can heal from PFS is already unshakable in me right now. I believe this is the absolute fundamental step in any positive goal or vision, claiming it as already yours in the here and now.

    Having said this, it has been and continues to be a tough and hellish road with my PFS symptoms, and so I can only thank the positive members of this forum who have already healed for persevering through their own journeys (I have likely read your inspiring recovery threads already) along with cd himself, for having the courage and strength to not only pioneer his own healing over a decade ago, but then put out this process for others to see and weathering the general doom and negativity that seems to be prevalent around the whole topic of PFS. Anyhow, this is already sounding like a recovery testimonial and we've only just begun - but I guess this just shows how just having the right mindsets, knowledge and community support can be a godsend in and of itself even before the healing journey itself has properly begun.

    My Hair loss Beginnings + My First Encounter With Finasteride - Oct 2014 - April 2017

    Back in Oct 2014, when I was 19, I first noticed the corners of my hairline receding. I rapidly went from having a straight a hairline to a noticeable windows peak in a matters of weeks and naturally it shocked me. I always felt I was decently good looking and I got attention from girls during high school, but my look was always a more refined and softer masculine style, kind of like a Timothee Chalamet or younger Hugh Grant (although I'm not saying I was as good looking as these guys, just that general style). I was also naturally very pale with a skinny ectomorph type of build. Therefore, with all this considered, the prospect of losing my hair and going bald at such a young age was an absolute no-go to me. I felt it would completely negatively change my look and vibes (a view I held for basically all of my 20s too). I was trying to get into performing at the time and was at that age where looks felt so much more important to everyone than they ultimately are - and I did not want to be a 19 year old pale, skinny, dweeby, balding/bald guy.

    So not knowing about the possibility of it simply being my mature hairline coming in VS male pattern baldness (looking back I think it was likely a combination of both as I have the genetic pattern for baldness in my family), I went to my local doctors and he put me on 1mg daily Finasteride without even blinking an eye. At no point were potential side effects even discussed, and to my 19 year old brain all I doing was just popping some kind of safe pill like a supplement or paracetamol that would give me healthy and thick hair and keep it like that. I had no idea about DHT, hormones or anything like that and hardly any further thought was put to it than this (naive and foolish on my for sure, but I was barely 19 and honestly didn't even think to think of the potential consequences of what I was doing).

    So on the same day I had the doctor's appointment, I popped my first 1mg pill. Although it is somewhat of a blur having happened around 9 years ago at this point, my recollection is that I had near immediate side effects over the first week of taking it. I remember clearly my erections definitely becoming weaker and overall feeling off in my body. I actually found old WhatsApp messages during this time with evidence of me and my ex-girlfriend talking about this happening to me - we kept referring to my ED/sexual sides as me still experiencing 'the thing happening again'.

    After a week or two on it, I remember I ended up dropping the dose to 0.5mg (1/2 a tablet) every other day and that seeming to help a bit. And so, for virtually all of my first run on finasteride, my finasteride side effects never really progressed further than this. I mostly had less hard erections at like 85-90%, slightly decreased libido, slightly lower energy etc. But overall the sides were manageable and worth it to me considering my hair sprouted thicker than ever before and my hairline came back in to the point I was able to style it anyway I wanted to. It looked healthy, thick and great and my confidence definitely came back about my hair and overall appearance and lasted for years like this. I was able to push the issue of hair loss to the back of my mind, however, if I was truly honest with myself at the time, I was always faintly concerned about the side effects I was experiencing at the same time.

    All in all, I stayed on finasteride for over 3 years in this cycle until my side effects starting getting steadily more and more noticeable throughout late 2016/early 2017. I started noticing things like my facial shape looking rounder/softer, more fat deposits and even cellulite developing on my body (despite no changes to my diet and fitness regime), and continued lowering libido and erection quality (75-85% strength towards the final months). While I still could have potentially lived with these things, as the weeks and months rolled on, I started to develop this knowing that I had just had to get off finasteride and get symptom free and my body back to normal. And so, despite the risk of losing my hair, eventually my concern built up to such a point that my conscience won out and I tapered off and eventually quit finasteride in April 2017, 3 years and 5 months after first starting it.

    My Life and Hair Off Finasteride - April 2017 to June 2022

    Within a matter of weeks of quitting, I remember noticing how good I started feeling and how much better life in general felt again. My erections came back in fully strength, my muscles and body started looking more masculine and defined, my energy levels shot up, my outlook on life became more positive and goal-oriented, my libido was in full force. Most importantly of all, I felt a lot of peace and relief that I'd decided to get off it. Despite the great hair results, I knew it was not good for my body and to know I was no longer exposing it to a drug for cosmetic reasons, even if it wasn't extremely bad for me, felt like the right choice.

    When it came to my hair, it definitely thinned out quite rapidly. I have photos from the period when I first hopped off and my hair almost immediately looked thinner and less full - but to my delighted surprised the thinning leveled out to a point I was decently happy with. Sure I didn't have the thickest hair, but I could still get nice haircuts, had a decent hairline and overall it looked absolutely fine to the point I still had overall confidence in myself and my hair.

    And so over about the next 5 years I was off finasteride, I was able to just get on with my life. I finished my bachelor's degree, spent time traveling around India and Europe, got super into self-development, got my first corporate job, quit this job to start up my own business, experienced a couple of long-term relationships and went through a spiritual awakening.

    My Hair Loss Crisis + Shaving My Head - June 2022 - July 2022

    Now despite getting on with my life quite well on the whole and having lots of these various life experiences, the one thing that remained very tightly at the core of my ego's fears, insecurities and attachments was my physical appearance. And the biggest part of that, was my hair. Even though it often didn't actively bother me or affect my quality of life during this time, no matter what I did, I couldn't fully put a stop to the subtle, nagging anxiety of eventually going bald.

    Over the 5+ year off finasteride, I definitely notice a slow yet continual progression of hair loss happening when I looked in the mirror. It was slow, but it was happening and deep down, it bothered me. Gradually, month after month, year after year it kept thinning and eventually got to the point where one day, in around late 2020 at age 26, I saw my reflection underneath the elevator lighting in my apartment and could clearly see my skull through my thinning hair and hairline. This was a hugely deflating experience at the time and made me realize I truly undeniably was going bald (I had a Jude Law type of recession).

    And so in this state of desperation, I researched some solutions and decided to hop on topical minxodil (regaine foam). Despite minor tension in the area that I applied it to that lasted a minute or so after application, the regaine was thankfully fine and I had no other side effects. The only downside was that it didn't create any great results or regrowth. It only marginally helped to somewhat thicken and slow down the rate of my hair loss - but given it minxodil does nothing to stop DHT, there's no real surprise here.

    And so finally, after about a year and a half of being on topical minoxidil solo, the increasing anxiety due my progressing hair loss reached a breaking point. I decided something else had to be done because I could no longer live so self-consciously and with a constant sense of impending doom and low confidence over my hair loss. So on a whim, I decided to just shave my head completely and embrace the bald look. I'd seen this channel on YouTube called Baldcafe throughout this time, which had video of countless positive transformations of guys who embraces their baldness and shaved their head and loved it. So this, along with my spiritual and inner healing work I was also doing at the time around my insecurities and issues, definitely helped inspire me to do the same and embrace this natural path.

    However, instead of feeling liberated by my new shaved head, it thrust me even lower into anxiety and depression as I just hated it looked and how I perceived it changed my whole vibe and attractiveness when interacting with others and just living in the world. Of course, even if this was partly true, I now realize that this was hugely overblown in my head at the time due to the anxious and unconfident mess of a state of mind I was in over everything. I now believe anyone can pull off the bald look with the right inner beliefs, authentic self-confidence, self-worth and attitude you put out to others and the world. Sure having a full head of hair is often nicer and preferable for most people (including me if I'm honest), but at the end of the day, I now realize it you truly are in your character that has the ultimate and most powerful, lasting effects in your life.

    So anyway, with my new bald look not working for me at all at the time, I decided to let it all grow back and quickly plunged into researching treatment methods for my hair loss. I obviously knew about finasteride, but was resistant to taking it due to my own fairly negative past experience with it. Yet after an exhaustive and intensive multi-week long research effort into all kind of unapproved research chemicals, alternate cutting-edge treatments, transplants etc. (all with their own set of pros and cons), I arrived at the conclusion that topical finasteride at a 0.025% concentration (equivalent to 0.25mg or 1/4 of a 1mg oral pill) was likely the safest, surest, least likely to cause side-effects option out there for me. There were several studies of topical finasteride at lower dosages suppressing markedly less systemic DHT and yet comparable scalp DHT to oral finasteride and I found several anecdotal reports of guys who previously suffered sides on oral fin having no sides after switching to topical finasteride. Everything pointed to this being a safe and viable option. So after doing my due diligence, I decided to give it a go. In that moment, my mindset was completely determined to try anything to get my hair back and not go through with my current bald/shaved look.

  2. #2
    SwoleSource Member Feedback Score 0 strato's Avatar
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    Quitting Fin + Beginning My Road To Recovery - November 2022 - Feb 2023

    So finally, I hit rock bottom and surrendered. It was a Saturday morning, around just under 4 months after I had taken my first dose. I needed help and so I found myself visiting my parents house to confess what was truly going on with me. They already knew something was up, but not the extent of it. As a generally positive, successful, optimistic, driven 27 year old man, business owner, and someone who has been independently living and making my own way for 5+ years, my parents were very concerned to see me show up in such bad shape and with a lot of my life in tatters.

    And so in the aftermath of me filling them in, they very generously told me they would lend me a little money to help me get back on my feet over the next couple of months (something I tried to refuse but they absolutely insisted I took it and the truth it was I needed it and it was life-saving gesture). They also said they would support me in my recovery in whatever way that was needed. I welled up with tears of gratitude, hugged them, and vowed to never to take finasteride again. My entire life - from my mind, body, emotions, sexuality and spirit to my financial situation, habits, relationships, and business - felt like it had been sucked down a black hole in such a short time, but at least I wasn't going to go down any deeper. With no more finasteride in my system, I could finally begin the process of rebuilding my life. It felt like a dark spot to be in with quite a climb ahead of me to get back to my old life and self. But as I lay in the bed in my parents guest room that day, still shocked and steeped in my symptoms, I also felt deeply relieved that taking finasteride had come to an end.

    In the immediate aftermath of quitting, I noticed some of my symptoms ironing out. Instead of feeling physically pummeled every few days I'd take a pill, I experienced increasing and stabilizing energy. Over the next few weeks following this, I definitely felt my neurological symptoms getting better. My heavy brain fog, negative thinking, low motivation and extreme emotions all started to lift, bit by bit. I could suddenly gain some separation from my thoughts and an awareness of my life situation again in a more objective way (rather than being sucked and consumed by everything that was happening). And as more time and distance from the last pill passed, I began to feel more able to process what had happened to me. I was definitely emotionally traumatized and shocked by everything, and so I felt sad, flat and depressed a lot of the time. However, I also noticed a subtle difference in these thoughts and emotions. They were more normal and not so extreme and blown out of proportion like when I was on finasteride. It felt like they were now only partly due to the lingering neurological and emotional side effects and now partly due to the genuine turmoil and anguish I felt due to the challenging upward climb I faced ahead of me to get my life back on track. Nonetheless, I started chipping away at it all to get my life back on track.

    Within the first 1-2 months post quitting, I built up the habits of eating healthily again, lifting 4-5 times per week at the gym, quitting porn and regular fapping, and getting back into my business work. Despite some very shaky and anxious financial times, I eventually landing about 5 new clients and so things financially started to even out which was such a relief (although at the time of writing this in March 2023, I still don't feel completely out of the waters financially yet but it's far better than where I was at my rock-bottom point). Building these habits and results again was both rewarding and incredibly hard. I still felt mentally, emotionally and sexually impaired everyday, often strongly. I still felt traumatized, shocked and just depressed quite a bit. Yet I also felt hardened and mentally strong in a way I'd never felt before. I was overall glad to be off the finasteride and willing to face the consequences of my own past decisions and to get myself and my life back again. So I just got on with it all as best I could, knuckling down and pushing through from one moment at a time. I wasn't going to be a victim thinker here and would do what it took to get my life back. This mindset definitely led to some lighter and more positive moments, which started to filtering in here and there throughout my week, albeit sporadically. Another great win around this time was that I also rekindled a relationship with a great girl whom I'd previously dated for a short while the year before (pre-fin), and we decided to start dating again. She was an amazing source of support, joy and connection that helped me find greater balance while I was rebuilding the other areas of my life.

    But even going into the 2-3 mark post-quitting, I still had some shocking symptoms I was living with week after week that had hardly budged at all. Chiefly, these were sexual but also emotional, neurological and physical too. To start with, I had literally (and I mean literally) zero libido for weeks and months post quitting. I felt asexual and could easily go weeks without a single sexual thought even though I was well and truly off the finasteride by this point. I'd walk past hot girls on the street or see them on movies and wanted to feel attracted and turned on by them, but I just couldn't. My body just wouldn't generate the turned on feeling. I'd also go over to my girlfriend's house and would be literally moments away from the opportunity to have sex with her and I felt no strong sexual desire or arousal. I was drawing a complete blank, nothing there. It was like the masculine side of the masculine-feminine polarity that creates sexual chemistry and attraction was missing from my experience. I eventually had to have a big chat with my girlfriend where I told her in greater depth what I was going through and why I might seems like I'm acting strange, not initiating things sexually or just being more flirty and fun like my usual self, and why I might struggle to have sex or be sexual with her properly for a while. I remember the night of this talk I was in a downswing and felt so helpless and frustrated as a 27 year old man at the peak of my virility and vitality sitting opposite a stunning girl who was eager to have sex with me right then and there, and literally not being able to do anything about it. But as shitty as this was, I manned up and accepted this as the consequence of my own choices, nobody else's. Luckily, again to my surprise, she was supportive, understanding and willing to be patient with me as I healed.

    My poor erections also persisted basically as much as when I was on fin. I did started getting morning wood again a few weeks after quitting (maybe once or twice a week), but it was at a measly 50-60% strength. At any other point I tried to induce an erection, I just couldn't get harder than 60-70% maximum of what I was pre-fin. I also still felt numb in my legs, soles of my feet, and whole genital area. This was a constant, everyday, moment by moment, unending numbness and sense of disconnection between my dick and brain - unrelenting for months on end. This side effect was the most disconcerting to live with as its in your face all the time from the moment you wake up. It's just strange and quite awful to be constantly so numb down there. I felt emasculated by this. I also felt increasingly concerned that my fundamental masculinity, sexuality, strength, virility, drive etc. wasn't kicking in again in any significant way despite a couple of months passing without touching finasteride. I also felt like my emotional experience was dulled and my overall connection to life simply lacking excitement, passion and vibrancy. Even as I started building up my life again and experiencing a few wins, I felt like my capacity for experiencing happier emotions was just dimmed. Despite meditating again more often, I still felt like a still had a racier mind and was somehow trapped in a kind of reality bubble that separated me from others and life in general, as opposed to truly being able engage with them and able to be fully present with life. This last one was more subtle but still prevalent. In downswing moments, when all of these various symptoms flared up, it often felt like simple things became a struggle (such a simply talking to someone) and I had to exert my willpower a lot just to hold it together, ignore my symptoms, stay present in the moment and keep ploughing forward. All of this wasn't like the last time I had quit fin 5 years ago at all where things just bounced back basically to normal within a couple of weeks. I started realizing something deeper was amiss.

    At this point, I feel it is proper to mention the state of my hair after post-fin. Within 2 weeks or less of quitting, my hair noticeably thinned out to the point where my hair loss became somewhat noticeable again (although not shockingly so). To my delighted surprise, my hair has remained this way 4 months later and I'd say that I have kept a little of my gains from finasteride. My hair definitely looks a little bit thicker than it was before I started fin the second time, but the main thing I've noticed since quitting is that the rate I was losing hairs each day has dramatically decreased. Before taking fin, I could simply run my hand through my hair and many hairs would come out in my hand, whereas now I only notice one or two. The same for when I brush my hair. I know it is still early days and that some guys report continued hair loss progression from around the 6 month mark onward, but I thought this was worth mentioning for those wondering what happened to me once I hopped off fin. I will keep updating my hair situation for those interested as time goes on too.

    So am I confident and happy with my hair right now? I mean not greatly. Coming out of the shower in certain lighting makes it look thin af. When the wind blows up my hair on the street, I can feel cold air on the skin of the receded corners. But I am a changed man now. I know what I have survived. I feel more deeply connected to my inner worth, strength and intrinsic confidence and value than ever before. So much so that while appearance still obviously matter to a degree to us all, my core self has shifted. Honestly if and when my hair goes now, it goes. So be it. If any extremely safe and natural ways are invented in the future for keeping hair, sure I can see myself considering it depending on how I'm doing then. But I will never touch a pharmaceutical drug again for cosmetic reasons. Ever. I will never take anything that fucks with hormones or the body in any way that skews its natural functioning and balance for cosmetic reasons. I'm now even hesitant to take any pharmaceuticals unnecessarily for my health in general, from paracetamol to antibiotics unless I am truly convinced it is necessary and my essential and only recourse for whatever health issue I might encounter in the future. I am absolutely committed to living an extremely clean and holistically healthy life in all ways. And I am also willing to do the inner work to heal any future emotional insecurities and wounds that may arise in me so I can be a truly inwardly confident, worthy, integrated and inspiring person and man in the world. So anyway, that's my current situation and mindset regarding my hair after everything. I feel significantly, genuinely, and deeply free of one of my deepest fears and insecurities. I may not be fully free of It, but it's been a majorly liberating and life-changing shift regarding my attitude to my hair loss and that's a huge gift from coming from this whole experience that I am grateful for.

  3. #3
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    Welcome! Wishing you the best in your recovery! Stay positive.

  4. #4
    Moderator Feedback Score 0 Cdsnuts's Avatar
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    Any reason why there are multiple copies of the same post? What the hell happened to this place when I was gone? Damn...
    Total Male Optimization "People who say it can't be done shouldn't interrupt those that are doing it"

  5. #5
    SwoleSource Member Feedback Score 0 strato's Avatar
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    Hey everyone,

    Thought I'd bring a little positivity to the forum with an update on my progress since last posting. I will do another longer, detailed, full story post/update at some point in the future if people are wanting this too and when more things have happened. We'll see.

    Current Updates - March 2023

    - I finished my 7 day juice feast, it went really well and it definitely feels like my gut health is better and overall health improved after it. Combined with cutting out coffee and also limiting foods I have reactions too (e.g. vegan protein powder or glutenous/processed foods), my IBS symptoms have basically disappeared and I feel way better in my mind/body in general.

    - I am able to have regular sex with my girlfriend now - my libido is still badly shot, but my erections are consistently about 5-10% harder now at 75-80%. As long as I don't push it by having sex too often and only when I feel ready for it/physically capable and in the mood enough to do it (about once to twice a week max), it seems to be encouraging my healing both physically and psychologically/emotionally. Things with my girlfriend are going really well, especially with this issue, and she continues to be understanding and work with me around this (despite her being a very sexual person)

    - I have been able to land multiple new clients for my business - if you read my full story, you will know that my finasteride symptoms were so bad it basically ran my business/financial situation temporarily into the ground as I was not able to properly function to run my business for several months. But after lots of tenacity and persistence, my business is getting back on track and the immense financial stress I was in has lifted for now. I feel deeply relieved about this - almost like I can breathe again lol Got to keep going though as there's lots more to be done here.

    - I celebrated my 28th birthday over the weekend where I got several compliments saying that I looked better than ever, that my skin was glowing etc. I put it down to eating so cleanly and nutritiously, sleeping a bit better, rotating the herbs, hitting the gym, living an engaged/purpose driven lifestyle. This was crazy to me as well because I still feel no where near my full pre-fin self, which goes to show the sheer positive power of these habits and way of life. When done with full health, I can only imagine how incredible life could be. I can't wait for this.

    - I have been especially on point with my diet, eating almost entirely organic, whole foods (nothing processed 95% of the time) with the exception of a slice of birthday cake I had (which I was massively pressured into having by everyone at the birthday celebrations and I caved in lol goddamn it). This had sugar/gluten in it but I didn't notice anything much after having it. I also had one oat milk coffee which was also fine but I decided after it to not re-introduce caffeine into the mix. Also no alcohol (I'm not even slightly tempted to drink to be honest). Other than that I am on track.

    - I also got back on track with the gym after my juice feast in which I lost 5kg / 11lbs in 1 week. Quite a lot. My BMR is insane and I am a crazy ectomorph type build and historically have struggled to put on size/muscle. Having said that, I am eating 3000-3500 calories per day (going for a lean bulk with this) and have gained about 3kg / 6lbs back in just under 2 weeks. I plan to get into the best and most muscular shape of my life this year, so we will see how that goes. I am pounding down food on the daily to make this happen.


    Other Notes + Future Plans

    - After experimenting with carb backloading for one week, I found it really just doesn't resonate with me. It's goes against my natural inclination to eat intuitively not to mention makes consuming 3000+ calories of healthy, organic wholefood daily even more of a challenge. I like to tune into my body at any time in the day and eat whatever kinds of food it is needing - sometimes this is paleo, other times this can include complex carbs. Having the freedom to do both works much better for me and keeps me looking the great physically (lean, ripped etc.). I almost always hit the perfect macros I need by the end of the day when I'm calculating my calories too, so it's a win-win-win. Carb backloading felt cumbersome and forced compared to this. In the TMO website it mentions how carb backloading is optional, so I wonder if CD or others think it is okay that I am doing without this particular part of the protocol.

    - I've just ordered my first bottle of Ultra Hard by Iconic formulations. I did lots of research on the forum into the various pro-hormones out there. I almost went with AndroHard by Musclegelz but after reading recent reports about it's weakened new ingredient formula (especially xxaleksi's) I decided to go straight for the UH. This will take about 3-4 weeks to get shipped to me as I live in Australia before I can then begin my first run (which syncs up well with about 3ish months on the TMO protocol). My hair loss is also still staying steady and has not progressed much now 4+ months off fin, so it will be interesting to see if introducing a DHT based prohormone will change this and revert me to more aggressive thinning/hair loss like before. I hope not, but what can you do. We'll have to see.

    - Overall, although life is definitely improving and I feel like I've maybe gained about a 5%-10% recovery to baseline (at least on a good day), I still feel like 50-60% my pre-fin self on the whole. I still feel very hampered physically / sexually especially with my erections and libido. I also still feel very emotionally numb and disconnected from the fullness of life, lacking drive, pleasure, passion, true alpha male confidence, humor, charm, wittiness, peace, joy etc. But I also feel super positive about everything in general. I am absolutely convinced I am healing and on the upper in life. I can't wait get my business/creative expression even more back on track over the next few weeks, and to continue with all my positive habits on my road to a full recovery. I am staying committed to the protocol and I am going to keep adding in new elements shortly, the next ones being the first prohormone run, HIIT sessions (still monitoring my knee-injury), and bathmate.

    I will do another update fairly soon. Keep going everyone. Keep absolutely backing yourself in life. I'm talking way beyond merely recovering from PFS, that's already a given. I'm talking about what's beyond that: leading a life of higher purpose, creating something meaningful in the world, expanding into your most exceptional self and helping others. To be a beacon of light in the world that demonstrates to others in your own unique way what makes life truly worth living. I am doing this too along side you all.
    Last edited by strato; 03-20-2023 at 11:06 PM.

  6. #6
    Moderator Feedback Score 0 Cdsnuts's Avatar
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    I had to clean this up.......You had almost 20 duplicate posts in this thread. People will be likely to read it now.......well....guys who like to read anyway.....lol
    Total Male Optimization "People who say it can't be done shouldn't interrupt those that are doing it"

  7. #7
    SwoleSource Member Feedback Score 0 strato's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cdsnuts View Post
    I had to clean this up.......You had almost 20 duplicate posts in this thread. People will be likely to read it now.......well....guys who like to read anyway.....lol
    The duplicates were probably due to me refreshing the page during posting - if I didn't do this, it wouldn't post. I could never see duplicates in any case

    However, you've deleted too many posts now so my story is now fragmented and missing parts.

    Please restore them or alternatively I'll start a new thread and you can delete this thread.

  8. #8
    Moderator Feedback Score 0 Cdsnuts's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by strato View Post
    The duplicates were probably due to me refreshing the page during posting - if I didn't do this, it wouldn't post. I could never see duplicates in any case

    However, you've deleted too many posts now so my story is now fragmented and missing parts.

    Please restore them or alternatively I'll start a new thread and you can delete this thread.
    Dude....this post alone was ALOT to clean up, especially seeing as I have to constantly ban and delete that psychopaths threads. Not for nothing, but unless it's for cathartic purposes, most people are NOT reading a books worth of someones story....no offense. They all have their own, they are all similar, and it's not going to effect the outcome of what you are trying to do. And really, what happened to you is over, and moving forward is what you should be focusing on. The HERE and NOW.

    Sorry brother. If you want to start a new thread, I'm fine with it. I'll delete this one if that's what you feel is necessary. I just don't have the time to go back and try and cherry pick the posts that were deleted because of the excessive posting.

    Whatever you do, please only make each post ONCE. Nobody was reading what was there as it was 200K words worth of posts, easy. Too much.
    Last edited by Cdsnuts; 04-04-2023 at 06:38 AM.
    Total Male Optimization "People who say it can't be done shouldn't interrupt those that are doing it"

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cdsnuts View Post
    Dude....this post alone was ALOT to clean up, especially seeing as I have to constantly ban and delete that psychopaths threads. Not for nothing, but unless it's for cathartic purposes, most people are NOT reading a books worth of someones story....no offense. They all have their own, they are all similar, and it's not going to effect the outcome of what you are trying to do. And really, what happened to you is over, and moving forward is what you should be focusing on. The HERE and NOW.

    Sorry brother. If you want to start a new thread, I'm fine with it. I'll delete this one if that's what you feel is necessary. I just don't have the time to go back and try and cherry pick the posts that were deleted because of the excessive posting.

    Whatever you do, please only make each post ONCE. Nobody was reading what was there as it was 200K words worth of posts, easy. Too much.
    I hear you Cd.

    This is the most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me. Having my full story out there absolutely brings me peace. Yes, it's almost certainly just for me, I get it.

    I'll have the new thread up soon. Thanks for bearing with me and giving me a platform to express through my process.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Cdsnuts View Post
    If you want to start a new thread, I'm fine with it. I'll delete this one if that's what you feel is necessary. I just don't have the time to go back and try and cherry pick the posts that were deleted because of the excessive posting.
    New thread is up CD. You can delete this one. I don't think I posted any duplicates, I simply submitted each text post once. If it created duplicates, first I'm sorry - it's unintentional if it's happening. Second, I can't see them - I see 5 stand alone posts only. Thanks again.

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