Alchemical Recovery out of hell of PSSD after taking similar 5ar pharma drug
Hi guys, great to be part of the group. I've come here to journey my recovery as I am to begin the protocol and to be honest I need some support of some kind in this lonely journey as there is no one who can understand what we're going through and I do not wish to burden anyone with this kind of ordeal irl as I do not want people to feel sorry for me but merely to understand but it's easier to share on a forum with many others going through the same thing.
A bit of back story, Went through a breakdown leading to a psychotic episode back when in early twenties (now early 30's) and took pharmaceutical drug which is a 5h2a inhibitator which I didn't have a clue at the time and a week later shut down everything. it was a hellish experience and knew something was wrong, very similar to the pfs shutdown. Numb genitals, crazy head pressure, anhedonia. It was like a switch just turned off in my body and lost basically everything, job gf and health. I immediately stopped taking it didn't taper, and don't think it would have made a difference, as the damage was already done. The docs lied and said the sides would subside, but I never had any faith in them so never believed them. I only took the pills as I taken to the psyche ward as emergency and so had little choice but to take them
I still have pstd from the whole experience and the mental torture,the regret and missed years just existing still haunts me to this day. I managed to reach a baseline after the initial crashto bring some balance into my state. This was dome through strengthening my adrenals as I found out had adrenal fatigue, which improved my energy as before that I was more or less bed ridden with horrible head pressure where my mind felt like it was frozen. Still it didn't help the sexual and mental sides that much.. many pssd sufferes are going through similar level of symptoms and suffering as pfs's. They also have a forum dedicated to finding a cure very much similar to propeciahelp, where the community is hellbent on convincing themselves that it is permanent with admins dismissing anyone who recovers natually. Meanwhile they are encouraged to experiment with different theories and drugs to reverse the the effects of dopamine antagonistic pharmaceutical drugs instead of going through a holistic approach.
It's nearly been a decade and in between self medicating through chasing sex, porn, smoking and pretending that I'm ok, I've been flirting with different protocols, doing a lot of research in the field of fasting, the gut, regeneration of cells, neuroplasticity but never sticking to one mode of approach as much of the information was scattered and my mind would put me in doubt even though some would have an effect like abstaining from sugar, nofap etc.
I covered books such as ultra mind, the tao of health, sex and longevity and the chinese book of health and healing and they all match up to what is outlined in CD's protocol minus the Qigong which I'm sure can be incorporated without harm. The herbs half of them already have from learning about them through books, cold showers already do from time to time but will make it everyday. Already have chlorine shower filter and don't ever use any deodorants with aluminum or unnatural creams. Nofap already been doing on and off but since I had ocd even before this wholeordeal it's been difficult to stop obsessing about sex even with the dysfunction.
I already have a background in meditation and breathing, however when everything switched off I don't seem to reap the benefits so fast as if you would if your functions were in order. I even done 10 day retreat meditating 10 hours a day and didn't do much of a transformative effect mainly because the food were vegetarian grains which ruined my stomach the whole time I was there. So sadly I didn't maintain my practice and ditched being strict with my diet as the candida made me crave lots of junk carbs.
I've seen naturopaths, muscle biofeedback therapists and nutritionists and all told me different things which were resulting in the issue. First adrenal fatigue, candida, inflammation leaking gut and that much is all true. I react badly to gluten and stupidly because I didn't have that much belief in any protocol that would send me back to my old self, I didn't take too much heed and abandoned the candida style diet.
So when I stumbled upon totatmaleoptimisation, i realised that without doubt that it isn't going to be a shot in the dark and now is the time for no hearted efforts but to go full in and incorporate everything outlined in the protocol. It's great that is all laid out in no uncertain terms, as I am all or nothing and when things are scattered from different people telling you hear and there that this worked, this didn't it gets a bit confusing and disheartening, especially when they do not suffer with identical symptoms
Right now I'm on day 5 on juice fast. I done juice and water fast in the past, but then would slowly eat bad foods that needed to be avoided at all costs, and would lose the benefits quickly. So will go on paleo without much difficulty and its great to know I don't need to go raw as have tried before but couldn't give up the meat for too long.
Apologies for the long post, but I think it's important to give some background, so you understand where I'm coming from and so future pssd suffers can come here comfortably and see that it can work for them also
My symptoms currently.
Numb genitals Big problem but a lot more remeasured hearing others had similar and fully recovered all sensation
Non existent libido unless I no fap for a few weeks or take forma stanzol, or after a gym session next day in morning some libido then fades
Bad short term memory
Weak broken voice with stutter
Brain fog
Disconnected perception and feeling from environment
Mental rumination (this is big problem as has made me give up in the past)
Things that are ok but not great
Energy Levels
Can workout and build muscle
Can laugh and make witty jokes which couldn't do when first crashed but still mind is slow retaining new information
Occasional morning and nocturnal wood
I have a couple of questions regarding the protocol
1)If later on I decide to take the prohomornes, considering I have no genetic disposition to hair loss, would hair shedding still occur?
2]And would doing a 5 day juice fast followed by 3 days water fast be decent enough before refeeding? The reason for this is that currently feel weak and have some business to take care and can't be out of action for 2 weeks
Alchemical Recovery out of hell of PSSD after taking similar 5ar pharma drug
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Alchemy
Thanks buddy.
I'm ready for the ups and downs, it will be better than being in limbo with no fluctuations.
I'm confident that I can manage to stay on the straight and narrow, which is the hard part as I have a history of self sabotage but now I have made an oath with myself from new years that I wlll do whatever it takes to reclaim my former self and then some.
This fast has already toughened me up and shown improvements can be made from small details and cleaning up. I done short fasts before but never beyond a week and would usually stop when it got too tough but I somehow managed to go through the bad stage this time and feeling so much more clarity and confidence already.
I expect another dip in mood as my body goes to work on internal cleansing and repair before the end of it, but I'm definitely seeing it out for the 2 week duration.
Also what is helping is to learning to be grateful over the little things and be thankful that I am in a situation where I can juice and buy organic materials to feed my body.
What got me out of the initial crash and pstd was realising there are people going through all types of traumas/injuries and they still fight on. A marine might become paralysed, another person lose their sight, or there are many sadly who over night become victim to a type of cancer. I've personally seen people get into a accident, fall into coma's and then come out in a vegetable state where they cannot do anything for themselves.
So I reminding myself now that even though I have to plough through these obstacles to get back my health, at least I have the opportunity to do so and it can always be worse.
Well coming from somebody else who always seemed to be into self-sabotage, if I did it anyone can do it
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Alchemical Recovery out of hell of PSSD after taking similar 5ar pharma drug
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Alchemy
The belief in my mind is cemented which will override the doubt and self sabatoge.
Until I stumbled on your protocol I was confused. I have knowledge of individual protocols and tried a few here and there but with no consistency because I was missing the belief that it would work for me, because I thought what I was going through was unique to me.
But every symptom you and others have had, is the same as what I have so the doubt is gone. Path is laid out in simple steps albeit requiring work and sacrifice, but it's a small price to pay for recovery and it's all character building in the process. It has been like trying to solve a puzzle and collecting some of the pieces but never knowing how to put them together. Thankfully you and others here who have recovered have solved it and provided the template.
Everything I've learned over the years through different modalities can finally be synthesised into one ultimate program for regeneration that I know for sure will work given time and consistency. This is an amazing breakthrough for me and I will enjoy the journey in rebuilding myself from the ground up day by day.
I just can't just wait to start eating again, been watching food porn thinking of all the different paleo recipes I'm going to try. There is a great pizza one using eggs and coconut flour for the crust. I use to make pizzas out of cauliflower and it was delicious. I know guys who are afraid of missing out on their favourite takeways, but there is a great adaption recipes that will taste even better and be healthy at the same time. So you can have fries and pizza but with organic paleo friendly ingredients without the gluten sugar,salt and bad carbs.
I just can't fucking wait for it all. I've used the herbs in the past and they spiked my libido up before stopping that as I went back to bad habits, so I know they work.
On a meditation retreat I was informed about win hoff and the guy was a beast at meditating and getting extrasensory experiences, so I know that works.
The rest speaks for itself, just so pumped up, I'm just counting the days before I'm back really hitting all areas like a special marine training for battle. Reading Maxout777's recovery just pumped me up even more if that was even possible lol. I get obessed with things as do have ocd but it's all been on the wrong things. Now I'm obsessed with being in the best possible heath. I will get into this lifestyle and make it second nature as its I'm just automatically remembering to brushing my teeth while I go about my life instead of endlessly searching for answers and a way out of the labyrinth.
Myself and others who have succeeded can attest to the fact that it does become addicting in a good way.
You have the right mindset and like I said before, you will be successful.
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Alchemical Recovery out of hell of PSSD after taking similar 5ar pharma drug
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Alchemy
Funny you post this as I came acrossed it about a week ago
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