My road to recovery

[Maxout777]

happy to report another upswing. i'm having days where my aggression and drive to succeed in life are pretty much back. also i find myself getting mad at things again which is refreshing after being completely apathetic for so long. also libido and dick numbness fluctuate from bad to decent. though in the grand scheme of things the thing i care the least about is sexual. give me a good mental state and i'll be happy like im recovered lol.

one thing i have a problem with though is OCD-ness about following the protocol. seeing as the protocol is pretty much routine for me now, it doesn't feel like i'm "following a protocol to beat pfs". i just feel like i'm living normal life. so i keep constantly checking the quick start guide on TMO to make sure i'm doing everything everyday. sucks but just gotta trust the process lol.

I struggled with this as well - and it's a good struggle. I attribute this to my recovery being within two years. I only slipped up and drank a few times, was rigorous with no gluten and diet, worked out religiously, sprinted, cold showers, etc..... and again, I credit this to making my journey relatively simple. However, near the end (say, around 90% back) - it got bad. I would literally decide to have a drink and then BOOM massive anxiety and doubt crept into my mind.....no matter if it had ill effect or not. Separating from that is hard, and you don't want to entirely - a lot of that doubt will help you maintain good health the rest of your life.....but you've got to adapt back to normality a little bit or else you're never truly "back".

[xxaleksi]

I struggled with this as well - and it's a good struggle. I attribute this to my recovery being within two years. I only slipped up and drank a few times, was rigorous with no gluten and diet, worked out religiously, sprinted, cold showers, etc..... and again, I credit this to making my journey relatively simple. However, near the end (say, around 90% back) - it got bad. I would literally decide to have a drink and then BOOM massive anxiety and doubt crept into my mind.....no matter if it had ill effect or not. Separating from that is hard, and you don't want to entirely - a lot of that doubt will help you maintain good health the rest of your life.....but you've got to adapt back to normality a little bit or else you're never truly "back".

Thanks for the advice Maxout. Off topic, but what are your opinions on AndroHard by Muscle Gelz? IIRC you used it at one point. I'm considering running it for my first cycle during the summer, as that'll be four months on the protocol. R Andro seems to be out of stock on pretty much every website that ships to Europe, and AH is much cheaper. Just wondering if it'd be safe to run it for my first cycle. Would also be interested in hearing CD's opinion on this.

And @Rick yeah it seems like the people who recover here do so in one and a half to two years. Has allowed me to stop obsessing over the condition and focus on the long term.

[Cdsnuts]

Thanks for the advice Maxout. Off topic, but what are your opinions on AndroHard by Muscle Gelz? IIRC you used it at one point. I'm considering running it for my first cycle during the summer, as that'll be four months on the protocol. R Andro seems to be out of stock on pretty much every website that ships to Europe, and AH is much cheaper. Just wondering if it'd be safe to run it for my first cycle. Would also be interested in hearing CD's opinion on this.

And @Rick yeah it seems like the people who recover here do so in one and a half to two years. Has allowed me to stop obsessing over the condition and focus on the long term.

That's why I always tell people 6 months to 2 years. Just depends on how bad off your are and your ability and will to follow instructions properly. Most people will inadvertently add time to their recovery by tweaking the protocol which for most people is un-necessary.

AH by Muscles gelz is a good product. Go for it.